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Shared Jan 3, 2021 comment

Sign up for my 10 Days to a Happier Mom Challenge (it’s FREE!)

Published: by Crystal Paine on January 3, 2021 | This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.

Recently, so many of you have asked if I could talk more about motherhood and parenting and the radical journey I’ve been on the last few years that has completely transformed the way that I parent.

I have such a passion to help moms parent from a place of rest and peace and joy instead of stress and frustration and exhaustion.

With this in mind, I created a free 10-Day Challenge for you moms called 10 Days to Be a Happier Mom.

Sign up for the challenge here for free.

Here are more details:

I will be sending you a daily video to encourage you on your journey to enjoying motherhood more. Each video will be less than 5 minutes long and is designed to give you hope, inspiration, and practical help to fall more in love with motherhood.

In addition, I will be giving you a daily challenge. This will be a simple but actionable project/challenge for you to complete that day — usually something you can do in around 5 minutes — to help reframe your focus and parent from a space of joy.

Want to join me? Sign up here!

Shared Jan 2, 2021 comment

My Goals for 2021

Published: by Crystal Paine on January 2, 2021 | This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.

Some Reflections on 2020

I look at this picture, I look back on 2020 and my heart is full.

It was the year I learned to value community and face-to-face relationships like never before.

It was the year I began appreciating my three older kids and my relationships with them more than ever.

It was the year I discovered anew that I really, really like my husband and we are not only best friends but we make a great team, too.

It was the year of experiencing God’s faithfulness in a tangible way as we navigated so many unknowns and had to just take one day — or even one hour — at a time… and trust Him for whatever the future held.

It was the year of shaking my head in amazement at the fact that — after years of infertility — God gave us the gift of sweet Kierstyn Michaela. She has been the wildest surprise of our lives and getting to be a brand-new mom all over again has been such a profound gift.

It was the year we said yes to opening up our home and hearts to a precious, tiny preemie boy who has forever changed our lives.

It was the year of great grief and loss as we said goodbye to this boy who captured each of our hearts at the deepest level, but also the year that we got to be a small part of a beautiful redemption story with him and his mama. We wouldn’t trade that for all the world!

It was the year I took my first-ever 6-week maternity leave — and then ended up deciding to cut way back on my work hours and responsibilities when it was done… and it’s been so amazing to realize that I truly do not find my worth in my work (something that has been one of my biggest life struggles).

2020 challenged many of my core beliefs. A lot of what usually fills my time was stripped away. And in the stillness and the quiet, in the unknowns, in all the weirdness of the year, in all the constant changes, in the multitude of cancellations, in the ups and downs and highs and lows, I got to cling to Jesus like never before. And I learned yet again that He is Enough.

On the hard days and the good days, in the grief and the gratitude, He was and He is and He will be faithful.

Why I Didn’t Set Yearly Goals Last Year

In 2020, because I knew I was going to be writing a book and having a baby and likely fostering another child or more, I decided against setting yearly goals and just set weekly goals instead.

Little did we all dream what 2020 was going to hold! I look back and am so thankful I didn’t set big yearly goals because I would have likely not been able to accomplish a number of them.

I had thought that I would continue on with just doing weekly goals in 2021 because there are still so many unknowns in the world. However, the more that I thought about it, the more that I felt like setting some goals — mostly around things that would really be life-giving (such as lots of reading!) and family time, would be motivational to me and would be just the fire underneath me I need right now in my life.

I’m still planning to break these down into weekly goals, which I plan to update here every week.

My Goals for 2021

You’ll notice that my goal list is shorter than usual and that my goals are simpler. I think this is the perfect balance of motivating me in the season of life I’m in while also not setting me up for pushing too hard or exhausting myself in the process.

Plus, I want to allow plenty of wiggle room in my schedule and calendar and on my daily to do list for being able to live out my phrase for the year: Show Up.

I’ve broken these goals up into the four areas of priority in my life right now:

Myself

1. Go through all of the She Reads Truth studies for the year. (Jesse and I decided to sign up to go through these again this year — after taking a break for a few years. I’m so excited!)

2. Finish 3 books a week. (At the end of the year, my goal is to have finished: 52 audiobooks, 52 fiction books, and 52 non-fiction books. I know that this goal is a little audacious, but it excites me, so I’m just going for it! I’ll be sharing my list of books I plan to read next week!)

3. Fill out my habit tracker every week. (This idea was something I learned a number of months ago from Atomic Habits and it has made such a difference for me. I got out of the habit and want to get back to it! If you are interested in me sharing more about this, let me know and I’ll try to put together a post about it.)

4. 8,000 steps a day = 56,000 steps/week. (I track my steps daily with my FitBit Alta HR.)

5. Complete at least 1 craft per month. (I plan to use some of the craft kits that I’ve gotten from Annie’s Creative Girls’ Club and Annie’s Creative Woman Craft Club. Since so many of you purchased the fantastic deals I posted from them, they signed me up for both subscriptions as a thank you! While crafting is not something I’m really gifted at, I find that it is relaxing for me and something that challenges creative parts of my brain that I don’t use very often!)

Motherhood

5. Have a monthly date with each of the three older kids. (I’m planning on having the kids help me decide what they’d like to do each month. I love hanging out with my kids and I cherish our time together even more as they get older.)

6. Read 5 books aloud as a family. (After taking a break from reading aloud for a few years, we brought it back this past year and finished a few books together. I’m committing to do a little more of it this coming year — even if it’s just a few pages from a book a few times per week.)

7. Read 12 chapter books aloud to Kierstyn. (I’ve been reading a chapter from a classic children’s book + a chapter from the Bible every morning while I nurse her. While she’s still little and much of it is over her head, I love to establish this habit when my kids are tiny so that it becomes an important part of their family culture for the most formative years of their life. Plus, it’s fun for me! I’ll be sharing the list of books I plan to read aloud to her next week.)

Marriage

8. Have a monthly date with Jesse. (While we hope to occasionally get an actual date night out, since we will likely be saying yes to another foster care placement soon, we plan to at least do one Date Night in a Box kit at home every month — even if we can’t get out for a real date every month).

MoneySavingMom

9. Launch my new book, Love-Centered Parenting. (It launches March 16, so the next few months a big portion of my online time will be focused on media interviews and promotional stuff. I’ve never been more excited about a book launch!!)

10. Decide on the topic for my next book. (I signed a 3-book contract with Bethany House in 2019 and we have some possible topics for the next two books, but I wanted to wait until I had launched the first book to nail them down. But I would like to have the topic and premise for the next book finalized by the end of 2021 and then plan to write it in 2022.)

There you have it! My 10 goals for 2021. I’ll keep you posted on how things go with my weekly goal check-ins. 2021: let’s do this!!

Did you set goals for 2021? If so, I’d love to hear what they are!

Photo by @emilyasheyphoto

Shared Jan 1, 2021 comment

My Word for 2021

Published: by Crystal Paine on January 1, 2021 | This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.

Usually, my word for the year comes to me around mid-November. It will typically be the result of prayer, thought, conversations I have with others, and books that I read.

Normally, I will mull on it for a few weeks and then, by mid December, I’ll share it with Jesse and a few others and start mapping out what it looks like to live out that word for the next year.

This year, it didn’t happen like that at all.

November was an emotionally exhausting month for me. We knew we were in the final days of fostering Champ and there were so many emotions to process with that. I couldn’t think much beyond just savoring the moments and loving well and walking with my family through this loss.

He went back to his mom full-time the beginning of December and I spent the next few weeks wading through grief, putting one foot in front of the other, and trying to adjust to a new normal with just one baby instead of two.

All of a sudden, it was three weeks into December and I realized that I didn’t even have a word for 2021. And I didn’t have any sort of direction as to what an over-arching theme for the year would be.

I’ve talked to a lot of foster parents in recent weeks and they all tell me this is completely normal. That the grief of saying goodbye is intense, that the emotional toll that foster care takes on you deeply impacts you, and that it’s hard to explain what it’s like to lose a child who is still alive — and to hold the tension of it being both thrilled and devastated at the same time. (Thrilled they reunited, devastated they are no longer with you.)

About three weeks into December, the fog began clearing and I felt myself slowly starting to experience motivation again. I wanted to read and bake and think about 2021 and what it might look like. And I felt less sadness and heaviness and more joy and hope.

At the same time, though, I realized that the events of this past year — of having my eyes opened to the great needs in our own community, of falling in love with this sweet little boy, of the countless doctor’s appointments and therapy appointments and meetings with social workers and middle of the night feeds and tears and prayers on his behalf, of the many conversations with other foster parents, of getting to cheer on his birth mama and see the joy and transformation in her life — it changed me deeply.

I know I won’t be the same again. I know I can’t ever go back to who I was before foster care.

I feel like my heart is more raw and tender and my resolve and passion for making a difference is much more intensified. As Jamie from Foster the Family says: “I could be sitting on the sidelines, in blissful ignorance of the brokenness that surrounds me, enjoying the whole-ness of a sweet and sheltered life. Missing out on the beauty of breaking off pieces of my heart and my life to make another whole.”

I can’t go back to sitting on the sidelines again. I can’t go back to blissful ignorance.

And so, as I contemplated these changes in my heart and thought about what it meant for 2021, the word I was supposed to choose came to me. I sat on it for a few days, talked to Jesse, and mulled it over some more, and it kept being reiterated to me in multiple ways. It didn’t take long for me to know that it was the word I was suppose to choose.

Well, it’s actually not a word, it’s a two-word phrase: Show Up.

Two simple words… but they pack a punch!

How I Plan to Live Out This Phrase in 2021

In 2021, I commit to Show Up in these ways:

Show Up for My Family — I commit to say yes more, to be more available, to be fully present, to live each day more wholeheartedly — knowing that every day is a gift and you never know when it will be your last one. I don’t want to take the moments and memories for granted. Less phone and screen time, more eye contact, face-to-face, listening, and bonding.
Show Up for My Local Community — I commit to being more willing to fling the doors of my home and heart open to people in my real-life. To not let fear of, “What will they think of me?” hold me back from following the Holy Spirit’s prompting to lean in and love well.
Show Up for the Most Vulnerable — I commit to saying yes to open our home up to foster care, even when it’s hard, even when it scares me, even though I know it will mean my heart will get broken again. We are actively praying for which child(ren) He is calling us to say yes to in 2021.
Show Up for My Online Community — 2021 is the year where I commit to stop worrying about the complainers and the naysayers and just fully show up as myself and as God leads me for this community. I don’t want to hold back sharing something that I know will help 97% of you all because I’m afraid of the negative response from the 3%.

So there you have it. My word of the year may have not come in the usual way, but it feels so right for 2021.

I don’t know what the next year holds, but I look forward to showing up for it wholeheartedly!

Did you choose a word for 2021? If so, I’d love to hear what you chose!

More posts on my words of the year in previous years:

Shared Dec 31, 2020 comment

The Top 10 Books I Read in 2020

Published: by Crystal Paine on December 31, 2020 | This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.

I set a goal to finish 80 books in 2020. I ended up only finishing 67 books, but I read and listened to some great books, so I’m going to call that a win — even if I fell short of my goal!

I’ve loved using GoodReads to track my reading. It is really motivational to see my progress and to have a one-stop place to see all the books I read + my star rating of them.

Of the 67 books I read in 2020, I picked 10 favorites. These were the 10 that impacted me the most, that I enjoyed the most, that resonated with me deeply, and/or are the ones that I will carry lessons from for years to come.

Here are my Top 10 Picks (in no particular order):

The Giver by Lois Lowry

It’s rare that I re-read books, but every once in awhile, I enjoy a book enough to re-read it. The Giver was one such book. It’s intriguing and makes you think at a deep level.

I don’t know that “enjoy” is necessarily the word I would use to describe my feelings on it. Maybe “genuinely thought-provoking” would be a more accurate phrase.

Kaitlynn and Silas actually suggested that I read it aloud to them, so that’s actually what motivated me to pull it out. Silas hadn’t read it before and it sparked so many great discussions. And when I ended the book this time, I had a different take on the conclusion than I did last time.

Here’s my review that I wrote when I read the book back in 2017 and it’s still valid:

Finally, I read The Giver for the first time. And you guys, I don’t quite know what to say about this book. At first, I was so frustrated by the ending. That’s it?!?! No! There has to be more!

And then I had to ponder and ponder over the book. I couldn’t get it out of my brain. What am I missing? Why is it haunting me?

The more I pondered, the more I really started to love the book and the powerful way it reminds us that without pain and suffering, we can’t experience emotional connection or truly feel at a deep level. If we took all of the pain away from the world, it would also take away so much depth and the ability to experience life in full color.

I wished I would have read this book with a book club. And I totally understand why some people love it and some people don’t like it at all. Have you read it? If so, I’d love hear your thoughts on it.

Note: This book talks about things that could potentially be disturbing or upsetting to sensitive kids. I’d recommend reading it ahead of time and possibly reading it with them.

Get Your Life Back: Everyday Practices for a World Gone Mad

I knew within reading just a few pages of this book that I was going to love it. I’m only vaguely familiar with John Eldredge and had never read any of his other books, but I truly found this book valuable and inspiring.

In fact, I found it so helpful, that Jesse and I recorded a podcast together with some of my initial thoughts from the book last week. Then, we invited John to come do an interview with me where he shared even more about what first prompted him to write this book (he was feeling burnt out and addicted to his phone and email) and daily practices that have helped him to regain his perspective, renew his soul, and refresh his spirit.

We recorded the podcast episode with him today and I can’t wait to share it with you next week! I think you’ll find his thoughts on caring for your soul, the power of the one-minute pause, and cultivating beauty in your life to truly be an inspiration!

And, if you can’t tell, I also definitely recommend reading this book!

Get Out Of Your Head: Stopping the Spiral of Toxic Thoughts

Y’all! Do you know how much our thoughts can impact our life — for good or for bad? If we dwell on toxic thoughts, it can ruin so many things in our life — from our perspective to our relationships to our marriage and so much more.

If you struggle with insecurity, stress, frustration, or feeling like you are failing, this book is for you. If you find yourself doubting whether God is good or if He really cares about you, this book is a must read. If you feel like you are stuck, overwhelmed, or constantly frazzled, read this book.

I thought that the first few chapters were especially beneficial. Jennie Allen shares honestly about her own journey with getting stuck in unhealthy beliefs and thought patterns and then shares how she found a way out.

While some of the book seemed a little redundant and like there was some filler information (especially the second half of the book), I found her insights to be very valuable. My favorite part was the illustrations that gave tangible ways to change your thinking.

The Boy on the Wooden Box

We read this aloud as a family and it was a winner book — meaning, all of us enjoyed it and found it engaging. It is the true autobiographical story of Leon Leyson, a boy who survived the holocaust as a result of being on Schindler’s List.

While I’ve read a lot of books about World War II, this one brought insight and perspective on some things that I hadn’t heard before. I thought it was an especially good read for our current times as it reminds you of how much we still have, even though it can feel like there is a lot of unrest, unknowns, and upheaval in our lives.

It sparked a lot of great conversation and discussion around the dinner table. Do note that some of the material it covers might be scary or unsettling for kids who are especially sensitive. While it didn’t delve into the atrocities of war and concentration camps in really graphic terms, it did cover some of the hardships and brutality that the Jews suffered.

Raising Worry-Free Girls

Whether you have sons or daughters, I think this is a valuable read. Yes, all of her stories, anecdotes, and advice is more girl-driven, but I think much of it applies to boys (and adults!), too.

There is an epidemic of anxiety going on among our youth. This book will give you some starting places, great tools, and lots of food-for-thought to help you combat your kids’ anxiety.

I found so many new insights, wise advice, and practical ideas for us to implement in our home through the pages. This book is not a replacement for counseling or therapy, but it would be a fantastic starting place if you feel like your child might be struggling with anxiety.

The Whole-Brain Child

I honestly cannot stop talking about this book. Poor Jesse has had to listen to me rave again and again about it!

This was highly recommended to by one of our kids’ counselors and and one of their therapists in the past few years and I finally read it. It is packed with great suggestions and strategies for helping our kids process the world, relate better with others, and feel more loved and secure.

It is not written from a Christian perspective, but I found the sections on brain science to be fascinating and really enlightening. If you are a parent or work with kids in any capacity, I highly recommend this book to help you better love, understand, teach, and nurture the kids in your life.

Note: I would have given it 5 stars, but I disagreed with some of the points (and felt a few were not entirely Biblical) so I only gave it a 4-star rating.

Romancing Your Child’s Heart

Romancing Your Child’s Heart is a book I think every Christian parent should read. In fact, it’s one of the best parenting books I’ve read.

While some of the illustrations might seem a little outdated or not something that are relatable for your family (the author is very much an outdoorsman type of person and he and his wife raised their kids in the same vein), the premise of the book is something I think we all need to hear.

It’s so easy for us as parents to focus on rules-based parenting and spending our days correcting our kids instead of cheerleading them and learning to communicate well with them. And while boundaries and parameters are important, we can miss relationship in the process, if we’re not careful.

I love how the author really challenges parents to take the time and make the effort to build relationships with our kids, to listen to them, to embrace them for who God created them to be, and not to try to make them into something they aren’t or that we think they are supposed to be.

Catch Me If You Can

I can’t stop talking about this book! It is the fascinating story of Frank Abagnale who was a daring con man and imposter. I listened to the audiobook and kept having to stop it to share yet another unbelievable story with Jesse of something that he did.

Frank traveled all over the world posing as a pilot, cashed 2.5 million dollars in forged checks, and even worked as an attorney and medical doctor (when he hadn’t gone to school for either!).

If you need a good listen of a story that is almost so crazy that you can’t believe it’s true, I recommend this book. It’s also a good reminded that not everything is like it seems and we shouldn’t take everything at face value! It also was such a telling tale about how money can’t buy happiness.

I’m giving it 5 stars because I couldn’t stop talking about it. I’d love to hear your thoughts if you’ve read it/listened to it.

Note: There is some language and some PG-13 topics in it.

Standing Strong

I loved this book and gleaned so much from it (as you likely know if you follow me on Instagram since I kept talking about it there!) This book is Alli’s story of struggling through some hard seasons and what she learned about trusting the Lord in the face of adversity.

Here’s one post I shared on Instagram as a result of reading this book:

You aren’t enough — in your own strength. But, in Christ, you can do ALL things!

As @alliworthington goes on to say in her new book, Standing Strong, “You may not feel able to stand strong. You may be filled with self-doubt. When you hear others talk about great women of God, you may say, ‘Oh, that’s not me.’

“But friend, it is you. You are more than you think you are.

“A superpower exists inside you. If you are a believer, the Holy Spirit lives in you. We can’t keep walking around feeling powerless like life is happening to us, like we are victims. The Spirit of God lives inside us, empowering us for greatness. We just have to tap into it.”

If you want to hear more of my thoughts on this book and hear some of the highlights, be sure to listen to my podcast episode with Alli Worthington.

Atomic Habits

This is, by far, my very favorite book on habits. James Clear, the author, does such a great job of unpacking why and how to build good habits.

I’ve read a lot of book on this topic and I feel like he has a very fresh and encouraging approach. The book is not written from a Christian perspective so I disagree with some of his worldview and conclusions, but there are so many great nuggets of truth and inspiration in this book.

If you feel like you are forever failing at follow through or you just can’t seem to stick with good habits, I highly recommend reading this book.

I listened to it about a year ago and loved it so much that I bought a hard copy and then slowly read it again this year. That tells you how valuable I found it!

Honorable Mentions

Five Days in November — A very intimate and personal look at what it was like to protect Mrs. Kennedy during the days leading up to and after President Kennedy was assassinated

Orphan Train — A must-read for anyone who is considering adoption or foster care. This is well-written and engaging and sheds light on the orphan trains (a part of history I hadn’t heard of) plus modern-day foster care struggles. Note: It contains a few sections on child molestation that might be triggering to some.

Forgiving What You Can’t Forget — A beautiful story of how to practical walk out forgiveness when it feels impossible. Listen to my podcast episode with Lysa TerKeurst on this topic here.

Coming next read: my reading goals for 2021 + a list of books I plan to read.

What were YOUR favorite reads in 2020? I’d love to hear!

Our All Day Family Christmas Celebration

Published: by Crystal Paine on December 30, 2020 | This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.

Ever since Jesse and I got married — almost 18 years ago! — we have celebrated Christmas with both sides of our families on Christmas Day. This has meant that we usually don’t do as much with just the five (now 6!) of us.

Last year, our three older kids said they would really love to do an all-day celebration with just our immediate family. So, we put our heads together, and talked about what that would look like.

We ended up creating an All-Day Family Christmas Celebration plan that went so well we all decided we wanted to repeat it again this year! Here’s what we did…

We planned our All-Day Christmas Celebration for the Sunday before Christmas. The week leading up to it, we all planned, bought, and wrapped our gifts we wanted to give to each other, the order of events for the day, plus the menu for the day.

Each of us chose one item for the snack table and one item for Christmas dinner and then we all decided on what we’d have for Christmas breakfast together. We made a few things ahead of time that could be cooked and frozen. (By the way, did you see my post on our Christmas Cookie Baking Night?)

On Saturday evening, we went out and shopped together as a family for all of the groceries we needed for the day. (We were babysitting for Champ, thus the reason you see two car seats in the photo above!) We also stopped by Dollar Tree to purchase our stocking stuffers items for our annual Dollar Tree Stocking Tradition.

Note: Need some encouragement to do Christmas in a way that works best for your family? Read my post For the Mom Who Feels Guilty That She’s Not Doing Elf on the Shelf.

When we got home, we all worked on cooking and baking the items we had chosen to make for the meal and the snack table. Jesse chose to make Bacon Wrapped Dates for his snack table contribution.

With all of us working together, we had everything baked and prepped in about an hour and a half, leaving enough time to finish wrapping presents and getting a few last minute things done for the morning.

Sunday morning, we had a breakfast of Brown Sugar Biscuit Twists, Scrambled Eggs, and Fruit and enjoyed this while we slowly unwrapped gifts, laughed, talked, and just savored the morning and the thoughtfulness that everyone put into their gifts.

Oh, and of course, we all wore our matching jammies (per Kaitlynn’s request!)

It was Kierstyn’s first Christmas and she had the best time! (By the way, as you can see from the gifts under the tree, we keep things simple and only give a few gifts per person. We try to focus on meaningful gifts and quality gifts versus quantity. I know every family is different, but this has worked well for us and our kids.)

(You can read more about how we’ve kept Christmas simple in other years when our kids were younger here.)

After we opened gifts, everyone cleaned up the wrapping paper and the kids spent time playing with and finding homes for their new gifts (Silas got a lot of baseball cards — something he’s really into right now — so a lot of time was spent going through them and organizing them together.)

Then, it was time for the snack table. Kaitlynn had chosen (and made) Chocolate Covered Strawberries, Jesse did the Bacon Wrapped Dates, Kathrynne chose Bean Dip and Chips, Silas wanted store bought cookies, and Jesse suggested we also make the Pickle Cream Cheese and Ham Wraps that his family always does (they are unique but yummy!). I made these and also bought a veggie tray just so that we had a few semi healthy options! 😉

Jesse went and picked up Champ so he could join us for part of the day (his mom was working and she was so kind to say we could watch him while she worked so that he could be part of our Christmas celebration, too!).

We had a few gifts for him and then we took a bunch of pictures of the kids and babies (Jesse had bought these adorable matching outfits for the babies — to protect Champ’s privacy, we don’t share pictures of his face on here, but I wish I could because they were insanely cute!!)

I didn’t get a good picture of dinner, but we had Steak, Rotisserie Chicken in the Instant Pot, Green Bean Casserole, Mashed Potatoes, and Sweet Potato Casserole.

We made enough so that I could freeze the leftovers and we could use them after Christmas when we got back in town from our trip to Kansas. That way, we had a meal waiting for us to eat when we got home and I didn’t have to worry about going to the store for a day!

After dinner, we opened up our stockings and then played games the rest of the evening.

All in all, it was such a special day. And because everyone pitched in and helped out, it was relaxing and simple and memorable — which are the BEST kinds of days!

P.S. Need some encouragement to keep things simple? Be sure to read my post from a few years ago on why we didn’t get a big Christmas tree that year.

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Shared Dec 29, 2020 comment

10 Things We Learned in 2020

Published: by Crystal Paine on December 29, 2020 | This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.

My word that I chose for 2020 was SAVOR. Little did I dream how much of my year was going to be able to live that word out so literally!

From so much time at home and so many things cancelled, to so much time spent rocking and holding and feeding babies, to so much unexpected family time, this year was the perfect year to choose to savor the gifts right in front of me.

Our year looked very different in so many ways — and yes, there was loss and hard things — but I look back and see so much beauty, so much growth, and so much to be grateful for!

In this last podcast for 2020, Jesse and I shared 10 Things We Learned in 2020. Here was our list (I know there are more things we could add, but this is what came to mind as we reflected on the year):

10 Things We Learned in 2020

God Gives Grace for the Present Not the Future — If we had known what 2020 would hold, we probably would have felt overwhelmed by it. But, as we learned, God doesn’t give you grace for the future, He gives grace for today.
Jesse Can Thrive on Less Sleep Than He Realized — Jesse has always needed more sleep than me. But this year, he got up every single night with a baby for months on each — and he realized that, when needed, he can thrive on less sleep. (I think it’s also connected to point #1, too!)
I Can Have a Baby Without Having Postpartum Depression — I’ve always struggled with pretty intense PPD and anxiety for months after having a baby. This time around, we approached things very differently and I had almost zero PPD or anxiety! It was amazing!
Foster Care is Brutal But Beautiful — This was one of the most emotionally stretching years we’ve ever walked through. Falling in love and advocating hard for a child only to say goodbye is brutal, but the memories and lessons we learned and how our hearts were forever changed as a family is so beautiful. Plus, we now have a sweet boy AND his mama to love — which is such a gift!
Turning 40 Is Not a Terrible Thing — Jesse turned the big 4-0 and he survived just fine. 🙂
I Am Not the Workaholic I Once Was — I worked a lot fewer hours this year and worried a lot less about all things running a business. And it was amazing! I realized that I used to spend a lot of time investing in and stressing over things that really don’t matter in the long run.
Jesse Discovered That Audiobooks Really Are Amazing — I’ve been trying to convince him of this for a long time, so this was a big victory… of course, then it meant that he ended up almost beating me in the number of audiobooks listened to!
I’m More Extroverted Than I Realized — Having so many things cancelled and spending so much time at home taught me to value and appreciate community so much more. AND, it helped me to realize that while I’ll always be an introvert at heart, I really, really love being around life-giving people. Zoom is just no replacement for face-to-face community.
Teaching a Teen to Drive is Not as Hard as We Envisioned — Jesse and I have both gotten to tag team together on teaching Kathrynne to drive and it hasn’t been as hard or as scary as we envisioned it might be. (Jesse has done a lot more of the teaching than me and he’s actually really enjoyed it!)
We Really Like Each Other — This might seem like a weird thing to put on our list of things we’ve learned, but with all the time we spent at home this year, we discovered anew just how much we like each other and how we just love hanging out together.

Listen in to the episode to hear us share our perspective and a lot more details on each of these lessons.

In This Episode:

[00:36] In this episode, we’re reflecting on 10 things we learned in 2020.

[02:12] The first is that God gives grace for the present not the future.

[07:26] Jesse learned that he can thrive on less sleep than he realized.

[10:13] I learned that I can have a baby without having PPD.

[16:14] Foster care is brutal but beautiful.

[19:57] Turning 40 is not a terrible thing.

[22:49] I am not the workaholic that I once was.

[26:29] Audiobooks really are amazing.

[27:45] I have found that I am more extroverted than I thought.

[29:25] Did you know teaching a teen to drive is not as hard as you might think?

[31:56] One of the greatest lessons we’ve learned is that we really like each other.

[35:29] A quick quote to close out the year.

Links and Resources:

Sign up for the Hot Deals Email List
MoneySavingMom.com
My Instagram account (I’d love for you to follow me there! I usually hop on at least a few times per day and share behind-the-scenes photos and videos, my grocery store hauls, funny stories, or just anything I’m pondering or would like your advice or feedback on!)
Have feedback on the show or suggestions for future episodes or topics? Send me an email: [email protected]

How to Listen to The Crystal Paine Show

The podcast is available on iTunes, Android, Stitcher, and Spotify. You can listen online through the direct player here. OR, a much easier way to listen is by subscribing to the podcast through a free podcast app on your phone. (Find instructions for how to subscribe to a podcast here.)

Ready to dive in and listen? Hit the player above or search for “The Crystal Paine Show” on your favorite podcast app.

Shared Dec 28, 2020 comment

Our Christmas Cookie Baking Night

Published: by Crystal Paine on December 28, 2020 | This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.

If you’ve followed here for awhile, you know that we hold traditions very loosely when it comes to holidays. We always want to give our family space to try new things, take into consideration the season of life we’re in, and decide from year to year and from holiday to holiday what works best for our family that year.

The one tradition we do always keep for Christmas is to make a December Bucket List. We’ve been doing this for a number of years and it always means that we have a memorable Christmas season focusing on doing the activities that we are all most excited about and want to prioritize that year.

This year, we had some new things on our Bucket List, including watching at least 5 Hallmark movies (my pick), going out for Hibachi (Silas’ pick), wearing matching jammies — we did this for our family Christmas celebration (Kaitlynn’s pick), going to the store and picking out special snacks and then having a family movie night (Kathrynne’s pick), Dollar Tree Stocking Stuffer annual tradition (everyone’s pick), All Day Family Christmas Celebration (everyone’s pick), and a few other things.

Jesse said one thing he thought would be fun to do would be to bake Christmas cookies together. We usually do some form of this, but we came up with a new twist on it this year. I had everyone in the family pick one kind of Christmas cookie or treat and then I made sure we had the ingredients on hand. The week before Christmas, we invited a friend over, turned on the Christmas music, and had a Christmas cookie Baking Night as a family.

Each person was in charge of making their chosen Christmas cookie and then we all worked together to clean up. After clean up, we had a rousing game of Phase 10. It was such a fun night and it was so easy to pull off! Plus, we tried a few new recipes and we enjoyed some old favorites, too.

Here were the cookies/treats we made:

Puppy Chow (Jesse’s pick)
Snowman cookies (storebought dough) (Kaitlynn’s pick)
Peanut Butter Blossoms (Kathrynne’s pick)
Sugar Cookies (we used a mix we already had on hand) (Silas’ pick)
Marshmallow Stained Glass Cookies (my pick)
Chocolate Dipped Ritz Sandwich Cookies (also my pick!)

Kierstyn enjoyed watching and eating a snack while we baked! 🙂

What is your favorite kind of Christmas cookie or treat?

Shared Dec 23, 2020 comment

Maybe you needed this reminder this Christmas?

Published: by Crystal Paine on December 23, 2020 | This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.

I wanted to post an upbeat and cheerful, “Merry Christmas from our family” type post. And yet, I keep thinking of the many for whom Christmas is just bittersweet… or maybe plain sad.

I think of the kids in foster care who are separated from their parents and families this year.

I think of the women who have written me in the last few weeks about losing their husbands this year.

I think of the singles who thought surely they’d be sharing this Christmas with a special someone.

I think of the families who are struggling financially who couldn’t really afford to do much for Christmas this year.

I think of the moms who lost babies this year and the women who so desperately wish for a healthy pregnancy.

I think of the couples whose marriages are on the brink of divorce or whose spouse walked out on them this year for someone or something else.

I think of the families with estranged loved ones who would give anything to get to celebrate with them this year — or even to just hear something from them.

I think of those undergoing chemo, those waiting for a difficult diagnosis, those who are in chronic pain, those caring for a loved one who is dying.

I just want you to know that if you are struggling with sadness or heartache or disappointment this Christmas, I see you. You are not forgotten. You are not alone. And I’m pausing in the middle of this week to remember you, to hurt for you, and to pray for you. You are not forgotten.

And if you are having a wonderful Christmas season, I’m thrilled for you! But please remember to look around and show some extra love and kindness toward those for whom Christmas feels anything like the, “most wonderful time of the year.” The world could use a lot more kindness, empathy, and compassion.

P.S. If you are struggling this Christmas season, it would be my honor to stop and pray for you by name. Just leave a comment with your name and/or special request and I will take time to pray for you this week. Even in the middle of your pain and darkness, I want you to know that you are loved.

Shared Dec 22, 2020 comment

Gretchen’s $104 Grocery Shopping Trip and Weekly Menu Plan for 5

Published: by Gretchen on December 22, 2020 | This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.

Aldi

1 large pack Tilapia – $6.09

1 pack Frozen Blueberries – $3.49

1 Whipped Topping – $0.79

1 pkg Frozen Broccoli – $0.85

1 pkg Frozen Potato Puffs – $1.49

1 pkg Frozen Chicken Breasts – $5.59

1 bag Frozen Peas – $0.75

3 dozen Eggs – $1.03 each

1 lb Ground Beef – $3.39

1 box Cocoa Rice – $1.45

1 gallon Milk – $2.29

1 carton Orange Juice – $1.89

1 Spaghetti Noodles – $1.09

4 boxes Mac & Cheese – $0.34 each

1 jar Dill Pickles – $1.99

1 Pasta Sauce – $0.85

1 can Refried Beans – $0.69

1 can Cream of Mushroom Soup – $0.50

5 Yogurts – $0.32 each

1 Cinnamon Crunch Cereal – $1.39

1 Cashews – $3.75

1 can Diced Tomatoes – $0.39

1 pkg Oven Roasted Turkey Breasts – $3.99

1 Whole Chicken – $4.33

1 pkg Cheese Melt – $3.99

2 boxes MooTubes – $1.55 each

2 pkg Tortillas – $1.35 each

1 can Pumpkin – $0.85

3 Chunk Cheese – $1.45 each

1 box Scalloped Crackers – $1.49

1 Chili Powder – $0.95

1 bag Wavy Potato Chips – $1.12

1 bag Big Dipper Chips – $0.89

1 bag Corn Chips – $0.69

1 Cantaloupe- $1.99

1 Pineapple – $1.39

1 bag Chocolate Chips – $1.25

1 bag Granola – $2.19

1 bag Mini Cucumbers – $2.19

1 pkg Applesauce Cups – $1.19

2.08 lbs Red Grapes – $2.68

1 bag Mandarins – $2.89

1 bag Brown Sugar – $0.95

2 pkg Butter – $1.79 each

1 loaf Wheat Bread – $0.55

1 loaf White Bread – $0.59

1 pkg Summer Sausage – $3.49

1 Cottage Cheese – $1.59

Total: $99.33

Grocery Outlet

I’ve never been into Grocery Outlet before but we have one pretty close so I thought I’d check it out this week. I was happily surprised to find some great deals. I’ll definitely be frequenting this store.

3 pkg Strawberries – $1 each

1 bag Apples – $1

1 carton Chocolate Milk – $0.69

Total: $4.69

Total for both stores: $104.02

Menu Plan for This Week

Breakfasts

Cereal, Eggs, Toast, Fruit, Oatmeal, Brown Sugar Biscuit Twists

Lunches

Peanut Butter & Jelly Sandwiches, Mac & Cheese x 2, Cheese/Crackers/Fruit x 2, Baked Potato Bar, Leftovers

Dinners

Venison Roast, Baked Potatoes, Carrots, Homemade Bread

Smoked Whole Chicken, Potato Puffs, Sliced Cantaloupe

Grilled Tilapia, Toasted English Muffins (leftover from last week), Steamed Corn

Spaghetti, Biscuits, Green Beans

Charcuterie Board (Fruit, Summer Sausage, Nuts, Cheese, etc)

Turkey Sandwiches & White Chili, Chips, Veggie Tray, Sugar Cookies (Christmas Dinner)

Homemade Cheese Pizza, Breadsticks, Veggies

Shared Dec 19, 2020 comment

Brigette’s $83 Grocery Shopping Trip and Weekly Menu Plan for 6

Published: by Brigette on December 19, 2020 | This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.

My older sister, Brigette, shares her shopping trips and menu plans every week! You can go HERE to see all of her weekly menu plans and you can go HERE to read all about her family!

Aldi

3 loaves Sandwich Bread – $1.77

1 pkg Hamburger Buns – $0.59

1 pkg Flour Tortills – $1.35

1 3-lb bag Boneless Chicken Breasts – $5.49

2 64-oz gallons Orange Juice – $3.18

1 16-oz carton Heavy Whipping Cream – $1.35

1 32-oz carton Half and Half – $1.35

1 gallon Whole Milk – $1.45

1 gallon 1% Milk – $1.45

1 16-oz pkg Deli meat – $2.49

6 pkgs frozen Broccoli Florets – $5.10

1 3-lb bag Honey Crisp Apples – $3.09

1 3-lb bag Gala Apples – $2.39

2 bags Spinach – $3.38

1 Cauliflower – $2.25

1 Pineapple – $0.95

1 bag Mini Cucumbers – $2.09

1 3-ct pkg Multi-Colored Peppers – $2.69

1 bag Red Grapes ($1.19/lb) – $2.49

1 bunch Bananas ($0.38/lb) – $0.80

1 3-lb bag Sweet Potatoes – $1.17

2 bags Fresh Greeen Beans – $3.18

3 8-oz pkgs Cheddar Cheese – $3.75

1 8-oz pkg Mozzarella Cheese – $1.25

1 16-oz pkg Shredded Mozzarella Cheese – $2.49

5 boxes Butter – $8.35 (great price!)

1 pkg Taco Seasoning – $0.29

2 large cans Chicken Breast – $3.98

1 1-lb roll Sausage – $1.89

1 box Peanut Butter Puffs – $2.39

1 large box Frosted Flakes – $2.19

1 box Kid’s Krunch – $1.95

1 box Cinnamon Toast Crunch – $1.19

1 box Crispy Oats – $0.99

1 box Crackers – $0.99

1 bag Rice Cakes – $1.75

1 bag Nacho Chips – $0.75

1 jar Spaghetti Sauce – $0.85

Grocery Total for the Week: $83.75

Weekly Menu Plan

Breakfasts

Everyone is responsible for making/cleaning up their own breakfasts. Choices include:

Cereal, Oatmeal, Toast, Fruit, Scrambled/Boiled/Fried Eggs, Veggie Omelets, Smoothies

Lunches

Deli meat/Cheese Sandwiches, Apples, Cucumbers x 2

Cheese and Crackers, Pineapple, Peppers x 2

Leftovers x 3

Dinners

Baked Chicken, Green Beans, Baked Sweet Potatoes

Build-Your-Own-Burrito/Taco Salad (Seasoned Ground Venison, Shredded Romaine, Chopped Onions, Salsa, Tortillas, Shredded Cheese, Plain Greek Yogurt, Nacho Cheese Chips)

Chicken Gravy over Rice, Broccoli, Cranberry Muffins

Hamburgers (I use a mixture of ground beef/venison), Baked French Fries, Broccoli

Scrambled Eggs with Cheese Sausage, Roasted Cauliflower, Grapes

Date Night Out (kids eat Grilled Cheese at home)

Venison Roast in the Crockpost, Green Beans, Mashed Potatoes

OVER-SPENDING EVERY SINGLE MONTH?Grab these FREE Budgeting Sheets!

Click here to download!

Shared Dec 15, 2020 comment

Last Week’s $67 Shopping Trip

Published: by Crystal Paine on December 15, 2020 | This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.

I did a big stock-up trip at Kroger last Friday and got some great deals!

The kids were especially excited about the ice cream, goldfish, and the steamed veggies (I have one child in particular that just LOVES steamed veggies with sauce!)

I was especially excited to find more marked down peppers since we slice these and eat bowlfuls of them for snacks!

I was also excited about the steamed veggies/pasta/rice as they will be great for lunches for the kids while they are home on Christmas break (they get a 4-week Christmas break!)

Kroger Shopping Trip

Here’s all the details on what I bought:
2 boxes Honey Nut Cheerios — $1.79 each when you buy 5 or more participating items, used $1/2 digital coupon = $1.29 each
2 boxes Frosted Flakes — $1.79 each when you buy 5 or more participating items, used $1/2 digital coupon = $1.29 each
7 packages of Goldfish crackers — $0.99 each when you buy 5 or more participating items
16 bags of frozen veggies — $0.99 each when you buy 5 or more participating items
3 tubs Kroger ice cream — $1.77 each with the Kroger weekly digital coupon
Kroger half & half — $1.99
3 18-count cartons eggs — $0.69 each with the Kroger weekly digital coupon
Chicken nuggets — $1.99 when you buy 5 or more participating items
4 2-packs of Italian Chicken Breasts — marked down to $1.99 each
Quaker granola bars — free with mailer coupon
Ritz crackers — $1.99 when you buy 5 or more participating items
Bagged salad kit — marked down to $1.49
Lettuce — $1.79
Milk — $2.49
Bananas — $1.07
7 bags of marked down produce — $0.99 each
Total with tax: $67.40

Want to learn some of my best tips and tricks for cutting your grocery bill? Sign up here for my FREE tip sheet on how to cut your grocery bill by $50 this week.

Shared Dec 15, 2020 comment

Gretchen’s $85 Grocery Shopping Trip and Weekly Menu Plan for 5

Published: by Gretchen on December 15, 2020 | This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.

Aldi

1 bag Frozen Chicken Breasts – $5.59

1 Unsweetened Applesauce – $1.95

1 Whole Chicken – $4.06

2 cans Green Beans – $0.38 each

1 Cottage Cheese – $1.59

3 pkg Applesauce Cups – $1.19 each

1 lb Ground Beef – $3.39

1 pkg Saltines – $0.75

1 carton Orange Juice – $1.89

1 box Thin Wheat Crackers – $1.09

4 Yogurts – $0.32 each

1 gallon Milk – $2.39

1 Cooking Spray – $1.35

4 pkg Mac & Cheese – $0.34 each

1 MooTubes – $1.55

1 Spreadable Butter – $2.29

1 Cream Cheese – $0.79

2 Annie’s Mac & Cheese – $1.19 each

1 box Cheese Crackers – $2.89

1 lb Butter – $1.79

2.68 lbs Bananas – $1.18

1 bag Granola – $2.19

2.07 lbs Yellow Squash – $2.67

1 bag Rice – $1.85

1 pkg Oven Roasted Turkey Breast – $3.99

1 can Pineapple Chunks – $0.95

1 bag Pretzels – $0.82

1 Garlic Salt – $0.99

1 box Cinnamon Crunch Cereal – $1.39

2 Chunks Cheddar Cheese – $1.45 each

1 pkg Deli Sliced Cheese – $1.79

1 Romaine Lettuce – $2.79

1 Chewy Dipped Bars – $1.39

1 Graham Crackers – $0.85

1 jar Sweet Relish – $1.25

1 Seedless Cucumber – $1.29

1 box Cinnamon Toast Crunch Bars – $2.99 (These are a special treat for my husband’s lunches.)

1 Cantaloupe – $1.99

1 loaf White Bread – $0.59

1 loaf Wheat Bread – $0.55

1 pkg Cinnamon Bagels – $1.49

1 pkg Hamburger Buns – $0.95

1 pkg English Muffins – $1.15

Total: $85.55