Money Saving Mom®

Guest post from of Kathleen Ann Thompson

This morning I wrote before I got out of bed, as is my practice. I write whatever is on my mind. Sometimes it’s emotions, sometimes ideas for a blog post or podcast, sometimes it’s working out a problem, and sometimes it’s my ToDo List. Today was a ToDo List day.

I wrote things like:

• Wash sheets and towels
• Clean my desk
• Finish podcast episode
• Complete webinar prep

I had a number of things on that list. What wasn’t on the list was ME.

There was nothing that would feed my heart, soul, mind, or body. There was nothing for fun. No play. Nothing for the pure joy of it. Everything was about productivity.

I had a lot on my plate. I always seem to have a lot going on, so I understand why the ToDo List weighed so heavy on my mind. Yet by not putting myself on my ToDo List, I was robbing not only myself, but also others.

In my opinion, here are three consequences we experience when we neglect to put ourselves on our ToDo List.

1. We become dull. 

The old adage says, “All work and no play leaves Jack a dull boy.” The same is true for Jill.

When we neglect to “sharpen the saw” as Stephen Covey put it, we become dull indeed. Mentally and emotionally exhausted, with the life drained out of us.

Our minds dulled from constant activity and pressure. Creative thinking shuts down, making it more difficult to solve problems.

2. We become stressed.

The beauty of life lies in the spaces, the unexpected, the not doing.

Have you ever noticed that when you take a break, even for a few minutes, and stop pressing so hard, you feel more grateful? More present?

When we neglect to put ourselves on the list, we fail to see the beautiful world around us. We resent people who we love. We feel impatient or anxious.

3. We become ineffective.

In our attempt to be more productive, we work harder. Working harder causes us to press. We use productivity tools in an attempt to buy more time, only to stuff more in. By pressing so hard, we become less productive. Clear thinking turns into auto-pilot. Robotic actions.

When we stop and put ourselves on the list, we are actually thinking as much of others as we are of ourselves. We are in a much better position to help others when we first help ourselves.

Crystal talked about the importance of taking time to do something for ourselves in two recent blog posts.

The first, Five Things You should Do Every Single Day – Even When Life Is Stressful, tells us that we should not only make our bed and clean the kitchen, but also wear something that makes us feel fantastic… and spend 5-15 minutes a day doing something just for us.

The other post, Moms: Why You Need to Give Yourself a Time-out instructs us to set aside some things we “have” to do in order to do something that feeds our soul, makes us come alive.

I know all this. I tell myself (and others) all the time. And yet so often I leave myself off the list. I don’t understand why, but I do.

Sometimes when I do think to put myself on the list, and even put it on the calendar, I blow right through it because I want to accomplish something. Accomplishment feels so much more important.

Do you ever feel like that?

Does the urgent scream at you until you succumb to its siren call? Despite all the facts, why do we continue to act this way?

It’s possible that though we know that taking time for ourselves is important, we somehow don’t believe it with our whole heart. Or we feel unworthy of such time and attention.

I don’t know about you, but so often I jump on the busyness bandwagon first thing in the morning, and never get off. In fact, in one of my recent podcasts, I even shared that I was earning my “Busyness Badge” and somehow, I saw it as a badge of honor. I missed all the warning signs and ended up burned out.

If you’ve been pushing yourself further down your ToDo List or leaving yourself off entirely, here are five actions I thought of to help myself that might help you too.

5 Ideas to Put YOU On Your ToDo List:

1. Pre-print some ToDo lists with an inspirational quote and your name automatically filled in at the top.

2. Schedule time on your calendar for something that will feed your soul.

3. Make a list of tiny things that would nurture or nourish you. Something that will take only a minute or two. I’m thinking that if we start small, that might at least develop a habit that we can build on.

4. Get a habit-tracking app on your phone that reminds you to do the things you listed in Step 3.

5. Find someone to help you.

I’ve done the first four, with limited success (old habits die hard). At this point I think I really need a partner — someone to take this journey with for mutual support, encouragement, and accountability.

Will you join me? Will you put yourself on your ToDo List?

As you race around doing chores or drive to the fifteenth appointment for the day, consider how you can add yourself to your own ToDo List. And if you have ideas for me, or would like to share your journey, please leave a comment.

Kathleen Thompson is a blogger, podcaster, and singer. She uses words and music to help people find their unique voice and make their life sing. Kathleen inspires people to celebrate each moment as a precious gift and find beauty in the everyday. You can find her at Kathleen Ann Thompson.

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