Money Saving Mom®

Thank you so much to so many of you who joined us for last night’s Say Goodbye to Survival Mode Conference Call! It was a great call — and your questions were fantastic!

If you missed it, I’ve got great news: we recorded it and are making the replay available below.

Some of the Topics We Covered:

• How to recognize the warning signs of burn-out and what to do about them
• How to look at failure as your friend and embrace it for growth and change.
• How to stop living in the “Comparison Trap” and find more joy.
• How to create space for margin and breathing room in the midst of a busy schedule.
• How to develop authentic friendships with other women.
• How to deal with and overcome mommy guilt.

In addition, remember that BIG news for our family that I alluded to in a recent post? Well, I spilled the beans on the call last night.

It’s a decision we’ve been mulling over for quite some time and are grateful that both Jesse and I came to a place of very clear direction and peace about it together in November. We’re sad to leave our friends and family in Kansas (sniff!), but we’re very excited to embark on this brand-new adventure come April.

Listen to a replay of the Say Goodbye to Survival Mode Conference Call. Click the play button below.

[audio:http://cdn1.moneysavingmom.com/wp-content/uploads/av/cpjan21telereplay.mp3]

If you’d prefer to download the file instead, click here. (You’ll need to right-click and choose “Save File As…”) [ 48.9MB MP3 download]

If you haven’t grabbed your copy of Say Goodbye to Survival Mode yet, be sure to do so here. I’ve been so blessed to read all the testimonies and reviews from those of you who have already gotten your copy! You all are the BEST and are such a source of encouragement to me!

I’m over on Incourage today sharing about 4 Ways to Cultivate Margin & Breathing Room in Your Life:

Picture a book that had no margins — the words completely filling each and every page of the entire book. Would that book be an easy read? No, it would feel chaotic and busy, probably even overwhelming.

So it is with our lives. If we don’t allow white space to breathe and refresh, but instead pack every moment of every day full to the brim with to-do’s and projects, our lives will feel chaotic, disorderly, and exhausting.

If you have a full schedule, you probably won’t naturally find much margin or breathing room in your life. Instead, you have to be intentional about cultivating it. Here are some ideas…

Read the full post.

I’m honored that Dot Complicated is featuring an interview with me on their site today. Here’s a snippet:

1. We live in a world where we’re addicted to being busy. How was your own busy life affecting your marriage with your husband? What made you turn things around?

Six years into our marriage, I found myself the mother of three young children while also juggling the responsibilities of a very demanding online business. Being a very Type A kind of person, I didn’t want to admit my limitations. So I kept piling on new to-do’s and saying yes to new commitments.

Over time, this led to exhaustion, burnout, and the breakdown of my health. But I pushed ahead, thinking if I’d just get a little more organized or sleep a little less, I’d find a way to balance everything. However, it just wasn’t working: not only were my kids suffering and my health suffering, but my marriage was, too. I was always rushing through my days trying to get through my overwhelming to-do list. And I was constantly too busy to take time to invest in my marriage.

Read the full interview.

photo emailed in by reader, Suemee

Thank you for joining me in all the excitement of my Book Release Day! If you missed out on any of the special offers and the washer/dryer giveaway, be sure to click on the links below for more information:

• Buy My Book In-Store and I’ll Buy You Coffee
• Buy a Copy of Say Goodbye to Survival Mode, Get a Free DaySpring Flip Calendar
• Enter to win a Whirlpool Cabrio Washer & Dryer

Enter to Win $1000 Amazon Gift Card

To celebrate the release of Say Goodbye to Survival Mode, I’m giving away one BIG Amazon gift card every evening for the next four days. To enter to win, just enter your name and email address below.

One winner will be chosen and posted tomorrow evening. And be sure to grab your copy of Say Goodbye to Survival Mode, if you haven’t already!

This giveaway is now closed and the winner is Mindi (ladybirdsegg@)

Don’t forget to head over here to enter to win a Whirlpool Cabrio Washer & Dryer Set!

I can’t WAIT to see who wins!

I’m going through your seven day Say Goodbye to Survival Mode Challenge and am really having a hard time implementing some things. I am almost 20 weeks pregnant and have a 2- year-old.

I honestly want to spend each day with some coffee and mindless TV while my boy plays. This pregnancy has worn me out way more than the first. I’m still getting laundry, cooking and cleaning done when I can put on Barney for a bit or when I’m not napping during his nap, but getting up early is so hard. I went to bed last night at 9 and still was solid asleep until 7am.

I have so many books I want to read, hats I want to knit for my friends moving to China, baked goods I want to make for families, biblical studies and better prayer time that needs to happen, etc. How do I implement both grace and discipline in my current situation? -Paige

{Hugs} Paige! You are in a hard season of life… I well remember those days when you’re trying to care for a toddler’s needs and you’re feeling exhausted from your pregnancy, too!

Here’s my encouragement to you:

1. Give Yourself Grace

There will be time for reading and knitting and baking and studying. Now is not that time. Right now, focus on getting as much sleep as you can, loving on your toddler, and taking care of yourself as you nurture a life inside of you.

When you are feeling discouraged that you aren’t getting much done, remind yourself that this is just a season. Before you know it, your children will be more independent and you’ll probably have more energy, too.

2. Don’t Play the Comparison Game

Whatever you do, don’t compare yourself and what you’re able to accomplish to other women. Each of us has our own strengths and weaknesses, our own struggles and difficulties.

It’s easy to feel guilty if we’re not doing as much as someone else. But the thing is: we can always find someone who is doing more than us in every single area. So no matter how much we do, we’ll always come up short when we play the comparison game.

Instead of comparing yourself to others, do the best you can do with the time and energy you have and then give yourself grace for all you aren’t doing.

3. Focus on Your Top 3 Priorities

I encourage you to sit down with your husband and discuss what your top three priorities should be for this season of life. Decide on these together and then write them out and stick them some place where you are reminded of them daily.

When opportunities arise or you have creative ideas, look at that list of three things and decide whether these opportunities/ideas are in line with your life. In most cases, I’m guessing they won’t be. And this will allow you to guiltlessly say “no” or set aside the idea for now. This doesn’t mean that you are failing; it means that you are being very intentional about how you spend your time.

If you find it helpful, you can keep a running list of all the projects and ideas that come to mind that you really want to accomplish — but add to this list and then stash it away for someday. That way, you have a record of the ideas, but you are clearly delineating that they are for someday, not now.

If the list ever starts to bog you down or make you feel guilty, give yourself permission to literally rip it up and throw it out. You might find this simple exercise is incredibly freeing to you!

4. Allow Lots of Breathing Room

I cannot encourage you enough to plan lots of margin and breathing room in your life right now. Write out a loose routine for each day, but be sure to plan at least a few hours of wiggle room in your day. This can be for you to take a nap, lie down and watch a movie with your toddler, to cuddle with your toddler and look at picture books, or to do something restful.

If you’re anything like me, by planning rest and relaxation as part of your routine, not only will it make your days much calmer, but it will also allow you to kick back and just “be” without the guilt that you really should be doing something else. If you’re tired, take that as a queue to rest and relax!

What advice and tips do the rest of you have for Paige? Share in the comments!

photo credit

I’m so honored that Incourage chose my book, Say Goodbye to Survival Mode, as one of their recommended reads this month! They asked if they could feature two posts from me this week, so here’s a snippet from my first post called The Day I Stopped Trying to Be Superwoman:

Not too long ago, I was at a mom’s get-together. I don’t remember what we were talking about but, in the middle of the conversation, one of the moms said sheepishly, “Well, actually I have a cleaning lady who comes every other week.”

She looked ashamed to even admit this audibly, but I quickly set her at ease by looking directly in her eyes and saying, “Good for you!”

We women tend to think that unless we’re doing every little thing to run our homes we are failures. We beat ourselves up if we can’t do it all. We feel guilty for even considering bringing in a little outside help on occasion.

I know the feeling because for years I tried to do it all, too. I juggled babies and toddlers and moves and job changes and homemaking and home businesses and financial struggles and potty-training and blogging and friendships and church and exercise and everything else that I thought a good wife, mom, and business owner was supposed to do.

Read the whole post.

I was incredibly honored that my friend, Michael Hyatt, took the time to read my new book and write a thorough review of it. If you’ve been wondering whether or not Say Goodbye to Survival Mode is a book that would be beneficial to you, I think you’ll find his review very insightful.

Here’s a snippet:

Even though the book is written specifically for women, I found it tremendously valuable—even as a middle aged man. Here are five reasons why:

1. She understands our complex, demanding world. More specifically, she knows first-hand what it’s like to feel overwhelmed and burned out.She is brutally honest with her own life, including the mistakes she has made along the way. She doesn’t set herself up as a guide so much as a fellow-traveler.
2. She offers practical strategies and tools. Though Crystal is long on empathy and compassion, she doesn’t get stuck there. This is a book for people who are sick and tired of being sick and tired.She offers practical, real-world solutions that will get you from where you are to where you want to be. The book is full of steps, tips, lists, checklists, and forms. Here’s a sampling of what you will find:
   • how to become more self-disciplined;
   • how to set and keep goals;
   • how to manage your time, money, and home;
   • how to juggle responsibilities and self-care;
   • how to experience less stress and more joy;
   • how to rediscover your passion and purpose for life; and
   • how to keep a balanced life perspective and make a difference in big and small ways.

   Read the full review.

Want a sneak peek at the contents of Say Goodbye to Survival Mode? Download the introduction and first chapter here.

Psst! I think you’ll find #7 on my list especially interesting. It always surprises people when I tell them about it, but it really does make such a big difference!