Money Saving Mom®

Throughout the year, I’m regularly answering questions on money and/or budgeting. If you have a question you’d love for me to answer in an upcoming post, please submit it here.

This week’s question is:

“I would like to know about your saving/investing conversations you had earlier in your marriage with Jesse and how that impacted your current finances. I often wonder if I had worked moreon investing vs. saving earlier in my marriage if I would be further ahead. I also wonder how risk tolerance and faith play into these strategies.” —Lindsay, mom of 6 in KS

First of all, thank you for such a thoughtful and vulnerable question. I think it’s often in our nature to wonder how things would be different if we had made different decisions in the past.

My biggest encouragement to you would be to focus on where you are right now and what you can do right now, rather than wishing you had chosen a different path years before OR wondering if you would be in a different place had you made different decisions.

Our Early Years: All About Survival Mode

That said, I will tell you that Jesse and I didn’t even consider investing in the early years of marriage. It wasn’t on our radar because we were just focused on barely being able to pay for rent, tuition, electricity, groceries, etc.

Since we had committed to stay out of debt and pay cash for everything, it meant getting really creative — even when we didn’t feel like it, or when we would have rather just gone and gotten fast food instead of cooking dinner, or when we would have loved to go do something fun that wasn’t free.

We came up with a lot of great ways to save money and we had a clear plan and strong why: make it through law school without any debt. But that was all we were focused on.

Sure, we would sometimes dream about things beyond law school, but it was hard to even consider what that would be like!

Once Jesse graduated from law school and our business began to take off, giving us a more stable income, we prioritized building our emergency fund. After that, we added things like disability insurance. Only then did we finally start discussing investing.

We went through Financial Peace University and I began to have a small understanding of the different types of investments. We met with a few financial planners and we started making a few investments.

What We Wish We Had Done Differently

Looking back years later, we wish we had known and understood more about investing sooner. We wish we would have moved to an investment firm that was a little more risky, aggressive, and intentional. We see where we could be in a different spot had we known more and been more actively involved in looking for new ways to wisely invest, instead of just kind of getting stuck in a rut for over a decade.

We actually just recently moved to a different investment company and, in the process, we reviewed all of our investments and really had to define our long-term goals. This was SO helpful for us to do as a couple — and we honestly wish we had done it much sooner.

I think it’s easy to get stuck in just doing what an investor tells you to do or doing what you’ve always done or even doing nothing because it can be scary to do something.

So our new motto is to stay sharp and never grow complacent — always asking questions and working with financial experts who actively seek smart, intentional investments that align with our goals and maximize our tax benefits.

What I’d Tell My Younger Self (and Maybe You, Too)

If I could sit down with newlywed Crystal (or any woman just starting out) I’d say:

1. Do your research and ask lots of questions.

If a financial advisor is unwilling to answer a lot of questions, doesn’t tell you why, and isn’t regularly reviewing your investments to make sure you are investing wisely, find a new one!

2. You don’t have to choose between saving or investing.

Do both, even if it’s not 50/50. Save for emergencies (we walk you through this in The One-Hour Savings Plan), then invest a little for the long term. It’s not either/or; it’s yes/and.

3. Risk tolerance is personal and it changes.

In our 20s, our risk tolerance was near zero. But, as we grew more stable and educated, we learned how to take smart, calculated risks. (And you can do this without being reckless.)

4. Faith isn’t separate from your finances.

In fact, it shapes everything. We pray over big decisions. We seek to steward what we’ve been given. And we remind ourselves often that it’s not about pursuing more; it’s about being faithful with what’s already in our hands.

If You Feel Like You’re “Behind”…

God doesn’t operate on a scarcity timeline. You’re not late to the party. You’re right on time for your story.

Whether you’re just starting to save, finally building your emergency fund, or learning about investing for the first time, start today. Start small. Start scared. Just start.

Because progress is better than perfection. And consistency will always beat comparison.

Practical Next Steps If You’re Ready to Move Forward:

🕒 The One-Hour Budget – If you want a quick, simple way to take control of your monthly finances.

💰 The One-Hour Savings Plan – If you’re ready to finally build (or rebuild) your emergency fund and create a savings strategy that sticks.

💻 The Work-From-Home Blueprint – If you want to earn extra income that could fund your investments or savings goals.

Lindsay, I love that you’re asking these questions. Your curiosity and intentionality speak volumes about your character. I believe, with all my heart, that it’s not too late for any of us to build a strong, purpose-filled financial future by taking small steps today!

Keep leaning in. Keep learning. And keep trusting the One who holds it all!

Related Links:

• Q&A: How did you stay determined & stick with it during your lean law school years?
• How to Teach Kids About Money Management: An Age-By-Age Guide
• When Your Bank Account is Almost Empty
• What To Do When You’re Tired of Being Frugal
• What Financial Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self?
• The 5-Minute Weekly Budget Check-In That Might Change Your Finances
• How Can I Budget When I’m So Far Behind?

What do you wish you could go back and tell your younger self about saving and investing? We’d love to hear your advice in the comments!