Money Saving Mom®

Missed the first posts in this 21 Days to a More Disciplined Life series? Read them here.

I’ve noticed a number of comments from you all about my resolve to get up by 5 a.m. Monday through Thursday. Many of you have wondered how I’m pulling it off or how I manage. And I’ve gotten vibes from some of you that you’ve felt guilty that you get up later than me.

Please, please, please do not feel guilty if you get up later than me. Seriously.

While I think getting up early can be a fantastic way to get your day off to a great start and I certainly don’t want to encourage you to sleep in out of laziness, I want you to remember that you need to do what is best for you in whatever life season you’re in. I don’t have a baby, I’m not pregnant, and I only have three children who all sleep soundly through the night (most nights, at least!). I also can go to bed early and I have a husband who is supporting and joining me in my early-to-bed, early-to-rise challenge.

Do What Works for You

There have been many seasons in my life when getting up early was not wise or healthy. Maybe you’re in one of those seasons. Or maybe you just plain weren’t created to rise early. What works for me won’t necessarily work for you. Don’t feel that you need to get up early just because I am or because it’s really making a difference in my life.

Consider what your family’s needs are. Consider your own strengths and weaknesses. And then choose goals that work for your family–even if they are almost the exact opposite of what works well for someone else.

Embrace Your Own Uniqueness

You can spend all of your life trying to measure up to someone else. You can fritter away hours of time wishing you had her hair or her figure or her energy or her gifts.

But you are not her, you are you. You have unique gifts, talents, and abilities. You can improve upon what God has given you, you can wisely steward what He has given you, but you cannot change who He has created you to be.

So instead of living life wishing you were someone else, embrace your own uniqueness. Don’t feel guilty if you can’t get up when she gets up, or decorate your home like she decorates hers, or fit into the size of jeans she does, or juggle all the activities and responsibilities she does.

Be Free From Guilt

Your life and goals are going to look different from others–and that is completely okay. In fact, if everyone were a carbon copy of each other, wouldn’t life be dull and colorless?

Do the best you can with the energy, gifts, talents, and resources you have in the season of life you are in. And then be free from guilt!

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I tend to procrastinate on the things I least enjoy. For me, that’s usually laundry. (No shock there, eh?!)

It’s silly, I know, but I’ll put off folding the pile of clean laundry until I am down to my very last outfit (it’s probably a good thing I only have a few outfits, otherwise I can’t imagine how behind I’d get on laundry!). The laundry pile will hang over my head and burden me down, but I often don’t do anything about it until it becomes a necessity.

Prioritize the Hardest Things First

Mark Twain wisely said, “If you eat a frog first thing in the morning that will probably be the worst thing you do all day.”

Brian Tracy wrote an entire book based upon this quote called, Eat That Frog: 21 Great Ways to Stop Procrastinating and Get More Done in Less Time. One of his main premises is that if you start the day out by doing the things you like least first, you’ll get them out of the way so you can enjoy your day more and be more productive and fulfilled.

Eat That Frog is an excellent read and it challenged me to go into my day with the goal of doing the hardest things first. When I get the most dreaded things out of the way right off the bat, it gives me so much momentum for the rest of the day!

I’ve been trying to apply this idea to my laundry pile. Instead of letting it sit and grow to an overwhelming size, I’m trying start a load of laundry first thing in the morning, switch it to the dryer before breakfast, and then fold and put it away mid-morning. So far, I’ve not been successful at doing it this way every day, but on the days that I have done this, I’ve been amazed at how well it works.

And honestly, when I just do one load a day, I’m able to stay on top of the laundry, it never gets out of hand, and it really takes no more than 15 minutes a day to keep up with. Why has it taken me almost nine years of running my own home to figure this simple principle out?

Save the Best for Last

Once you’ve accomplished your most dreaded tasks for the day, reward yourself with some of the tasks you enjoy doing. This will give you something to look forward to when you’re in the midst of doing your hard tasks and will probably give you motivation to accomplish them more quickly.

Practical Application

1) Read this great article: Start Your Day By Eating a Frog for some great step-by-step help in prioritizing your day.

2) Determine what you tend to procrastinate on and develop a plan of action for making it a first priority.

3) If you have a chance, check out Eat That Frog: 21 Great Ways to Stop Procrastinating and Get More Done in Less Time from your local library. It’s a quick read and it’s packed with helpful inspiration.

Note: I’m taking the weekend off from posting this daily series, but will be back with the next installment on Monday. Enjoy a little breather–but keep on with your discipline goals and projects!

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Missed the first posts in this 21 Days to a More Disciplined Life series? Read them here.

Learn to Say No

I don’t like to let people down. I don’t like to admit I can’t add another thing to my plate. In short, I don’t like saying no.

But in the last few years, I’ve finally come to realize an important truth: superwoman is a myth. If I want to live a productive, efficient, happy, peaceful, and disciplined life, I must learn to say no. And I must say it often.

If you want to stick with your goals, you’re going to have to get good at saying no. It’s hard to do, especially if you’re an over-achiever like me. But you’ll only end up frustrated, exhausted, and depleted if you try to do it all.

The reality is: I can’t do it all. When I say yes to one thing, I must say no to something else. When I choose to make getting up early a priority, I have to say no to habitually staying up late. I also have to say no to most activities and events that would keep me up late.

Count the Costs

Slowly but surely, I’m learning to think before committing to anything: what will be the consequences of saying yes? Will saying yes to this late-night thing throw me off-course and mean that I can’t get up before 5 a.m.? Will saying yes to this big commitment mean that my home and family suffers?

Count the cost of each commitment before you make the final decision. Don’t just blindly say yes when someone tries to convince you that you must do X, Y, or Z. Don’t give in to peer pressure or make decisions based upon what people might think of you if you say no.

Choose the Best Stuff First

You can’t say yes to everything. It’s up to you to pick and choose wisely and say yes to only what is best. If you have leftover time and energy, you can always say yes to some good things, too. But start with the best stuff first.

Practical Application

1) Evaluate all the activities and commitments on your plate right now. Choose one that really doesn’t matter or isn’t helping you move closer to your longterm goals and get rid of it. If it’s something that involves other people, make sure you don’t just walk out on them without tying up all the lose ends first. Tell us in the comments what you decided to cut out from your life. I’m anxious to hear! 🙂

2) Make a habit of saying no more often than you say yes. The peace and order you’ll begin to experience in your life will be well worth the initial difficulty of actually saying no.

How are you doing on your current habit? I went to bed early last night and found it was so much easier to get up at 5 a.m. this morning. I need to do that more often! 🙂 I’m very ready for the weekend and getting to sleep in until 7 a.m., but I’m happy to have made it through another Monday through Thursday of getting up by 5 a.m. every day. (Okay, so I know that I initially said I was going to get up before 5 a.m., but I’ve decided to give myself grace adn just stick with by 5 a.m. for now!)

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Missed the first posts in this 21 Days to a More Disciplined Life series? Read them here.

If you want to succeed at discipline, you have got to be focused. You’ll never hit the bull’s eye if you’re aiming at multiple targets.

Here are three keys for maintaining focus:

1) Remove Distractions

If you are struggling to follow through with your goal(s), step back and examine if there are things that are serving as major distractions:

::Are you on Facebook or reading blogs instead of cleaning up your kitchen at night like you’d committed to? Set up Leechblock on your computer for the hour after dinner so you can’t get on the computer.

::Are you giving in to the temptation to eat two brownies every night, even though you’re trying to lose five pounds? Get rid of the brownies and don’t make anymore! Seriously, it’s better to throw them in the trash if they are keeping you from sticking with your goals.

2) Break Your Goal(s) Into Bite-Sized Pieces

If you look at your goal(s) as a whole, you can quickly get overwhelmed. But when you break it down into small pieces, it becomes much more manageable. In addition, it’s much easier to stay focused if you are only looking at the next few steps ahead of you than the huge mountain you’re aiming to climb.

Trying to lose 50 pounds can be daunting unless you break it down and focus on losing a half pound at a time. Successful marathoners can’t get hung up worrying about how they are going to finish, they just have to pace themselves for this mile or half-mile that they are currently running.

If you have a home piled with clutter, you won’t be able to overhaul it in a day. If, however, you set the timer for 15 minutes every day and work faithfully on it for three months, you’ll see some real progress.

3) Set Yourself Up for Success

It’s easy to make excuses for a lack of discipline, but excuses don’t get you anywhere. Instead, invest the time and effort you’d usually take to make excuses to consider what you can do to set yourself up for success in achieving your goals.

For instance, if you’re trying to get up early but you find that you always fall back to sleep or hit the snooze button, don’t just give up and make the excuse that “I’m not a morning person”. Maybe you’re not, but until you’ve put forth significant effort to try getting up early on a regular basis, you can’t make that statement.

Start winding down for bed at least an hour before you plan to go to bed. Make a point to go to bed an hour or two earlier than you usually do. Buy an alarm without a snooze, set multiple alarms, or have a friend call you at 6 a.m. every morning. Make yourself get right out of bed and jump in the shower to wake yourself up. Or, put your shoes on and go out for a morning run. Even if you’re dog tired, you’ll probably feel wide awake by the time you get home!

Practical Application

1) Consider what is distracting you from staying focused on your goal(s). How can you remove these distractions?

2) If you didn’t do so earlier in this series, take the time to break your goal(s) down into small bite-sized pieces. If applicable, set a specific timeframe for accomplishing each of these small pieces.

3) What things are hindering your success in following through with your goal(s)? What steps can you take to set you up for better success?

How are you doing on your current habit? I got up at 5 a.m. again this morning. I practically had to drag myself out of bed, but I was glad that I did later. And after a brisk run, a shower, and a cup of coffee, I felt quite energetic. However, I’m going to bed an hour earlier tonight, because I’m beginning to feel low on sleep!

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Missed the first posts in the 21 Days to a More Disciplined Life series? Read them here.

Early this morning, my friend Angie texted me with a question about freezer cooking. As we were texting back and forth she asked, “Did you run this morning?”

You see, Angie and I have both been individually trying to get up early and run in the mornings. We both know we feel better and accomplish more when we do it, but it’s not always easy–especially on cold mornings.

This morning when she texted me, I hadn’t run yet as I was hard at work wrapping up the details to post about my free freezer cooking ebook. Her text was just the motivation I needed to pull myself up out of the comfortable chair I was seated in and go run a mile. Yes, it was just a mile, but it was something and it made me feel a lot more energetic the rest of the morning.

You Need Cheerleaders

You can’t do this discipline thing alone. Well, you can, but I guarantee you it will be a lot harder to keep at it if you don’t have anyone encouraging you along the way.

Whenever I run by myself, I’ve found that I tend to go easier on myself and stop earlier than I planned. If my side starts hurting or I have a long to-do list, I use that as an excuse for a short run. However, when I run with someone else, I’m always motivated to push a little harder, go a little faster, and not give up when I feel winded and tired.

It’s the same with life: when you feel like you’re going it alone, it’s harder to keep on when the going gets rough. But when you have others around you who are encouraging you, checking up on you, or texting you to make sure you’re following through with your morning run (thanks, Angie!), you’re much more apt to actually stick with your goals.

My husband has graciously agreed to be my early morning wake-up accountability partner for this 21 Days to a More Disciplined Life Challenge. When I came to him and presented the idea of possibly committing to get up before 5 a.m. Monday through Thursday for three weeks, he jumped right on board and enthusiastically said he’d join me.

While neither of us have been quite as enthusiastic in the early mornings when the alarm clock goes off, it’s been much easier to stick with our commitment when we’re both doing it. And, of course, posting about this challenge publicly on my blog has been a huge motivation, as well.

How to Find An Accountability Partner

You might be thinking, “I wish I had an accountability partner, but I don’t even know where to find one.” Well, it might not be as hard as you think. Start with your local friends and family and see if anyone would like to join you in keeping each other accountable to one specific goal on a regular basis.

If you can’t find anyone locally, ask friends on Facebook, Twitter, your blog, or other online groups you’re a part of. Or, search and see if there’s already an online support group of some sort (such as the Good Morning Girls or Hello Mornings Challenge, if you’re working on getting up early).

Practical Application

1) Find an accountability partner either locally or online.

2) Create a specific plan for how you each will hold each other accountable for your goal(s). Will you email, call, text, talk in person? How often will you check up on each other?

3) If you have an accountability partner, tell us about it in the comments. I’d love to hear what’s worked well for you!

How are you doing on your current habit? I got up right at 5 a.m. this morning–yay! I had had a busy day yesterday and had stayed up late reading a book (I know, I know, I shouldn’t have!), so it was really hard not to hit snooze and go back to bed this morning. But the accountability of my husband and knowing I was going to have to report back to you all tonight motivated me. And I ended up quickly forgetting about my tiredness with all the activity of the day!

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Missed the first posts in this series? Read them here.

To intentionally cultivate discipline in your life, you must have goals. Not just dreams, not just lofty ambitions, but specific, realistic, achievable goals. If you don’t know where you’re aiming, you’ll lack direction and purpose.

Put Your Goals on Paper

I love how Dave Ramsey encourages people to put their financial goals “on paper, on purpose”. When you write down your goals, instead of just keeping them floating around in your brain, it puts more weight to them. Plus, if you write your goals down, you’re able to track your progress and be encouraged at the momentum you’re gaining in the right direction.

There are some very helpful goal-setting worksheets available from Project Management Skills and from Cigna Behavioral Health. However, please don’t be overwhelmed by these more in-depth worksheets. A simple sticky-note taped to your mirror or refrigerator will work just as well. The objective is not to have a fancy paper filled out, but to actually follow through with your goals.

Take Small Bites

Once you’ve written down the goal or two you are focusing on implementing in your life, develop an incremental plan of action for accomplishing that goal. Some goals lend themselves more to babysteps than others. For instance, if you want to lose five pounds in six weeks, you can create a six-week plan to achieve this goal that could look something like this:

Week 1: Track your calorie intake through SparkPeople. Exercise for 2 hours total.

Week 2: Find an accountability partner. Continue to track calorie intake, adjust if needed. Exercise for 2.5 hours total.

Week 3: Check-in with accountability partner. Continue to track calorie intake, adjust if needed. Exercise for 3 hours total. Drink more water.

Week 4: Check-in with accountability partner. Continue to track calorie intake, adjust if needed. Exercise for 3 hours total. Drink at least 8-10 glasses of water daily. Cut out fast food, sugar, or soda pop.

Week 5: Maintain all habits from previous weeks, re-evaluate anything that isn’t working.

Week 6: Reward yourself for losing five pounds and developing some good habits that will hopefully stick around for a long time.

Now, I’m not saying that the above plan is guaranteed to make you lose five pounds in six weeks, but it gives you an idea of how to take a bigger goal and break it down into smaller pieces. Instead of being overwhelmed by looking at the big picture, think what small steps you can slowly take to get where you want to go. Map them out and then follow them!

Review & Tweak As Needed

Post your goal(s) in a conspicuous place and review them often. I’d suggest reviewing them at least daily, if not more often. Remind yourself of where you’re headed and how you’re planning to get there.

If you are struggling and feeling overwhelmed in the goal(s) you have set for yourself, step back and re-evaluate. Do you need to give yourself more time? Do you need tweak your goal(s) a little to be more realistic?

Practical Application

1) Write down your current habit/goal and put it in a conspicuous location.

2) If you’ve chosen a larger goal, break it down into bite-sized pieces and create a plan of action for the next few weeks or months.

3) Set up a weekly “appointment” with yourself to review and re-evaluate your goal(s) and how things are going.

How are you doing on your current habit? So far, I’ve stuck with my resolve to get up before 5 a.m. Monday through Thursday and before 7 a.m. Friday through Sunday. I’ve been amazed at how much more I’m getting done when I get up earlier!

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