Money Saving Mom®

Guest post from Reelika of Financially Wise On Heels

Having a good relationship and communication with your partner is the key for a good life. Unfortunately, statistics show that many people get divorced due to financial issues. One of the problems may be that one person is a spender and the other is a saver.

If you and your significant other are at odds when it comes to financial issues, these 5 tips can help you better understand each other — and learn to love the spender in your life!

1. Listen, Share, and Communicate

Spenders think differently about money, saving, and spending. They are more impulsive and don’t consider the differences between “wants” and “needs”.

However, before you speak, listen carefully to what the spender has to share. Don’t get emotional, but instead, share your thoughts and find the mutual language. Don’t brag about how much you always save and don’t be judgmental.

2. Understand the Spender’s Background and the “Why”

How did the spender grow up? What were their family’s saving and spending habits? What are the real “whys” he or she wants to spend so much?

Maybe it is a relief of stress, or finally having the opportunity to buy something? Spenders just love spending, no matter what the cost is. It can be frustrating, but always look for the real “why”.

3. Create a Family Budget Plan Together

Having a family budget plan is crucial… and having the main spender involved is even more important. Create a plan together and discuss any splurges with the purpose of finding a solution.

Create a separate section for “free spending,” so it becomes part of your budget plan already… and determine the amount that you are both able to spend without breaking your budget.

This relieves the stress for both of you as the spender can enjoy spending, and it is already part of your family’s expenses.

4. Have Regular Family Meetings

Regular family meetings to discuss family finances can be very helpful. Don’t only discuss spending, but also the possibilities for increasing the number of income streams.

Make sure you don’t have the meeting after stressful day at work. This is never a good idea. Rather pick a weekend when you are not tired or rushing anywhere. It is important to make it a regular habit, otherwise the results are often only short term.

5. Balance Spending with Frugal Hacks

Spending and shopping are not necessarily bad habits. However, spending should be balanced with frugal hacks and/or savings.

One way to do it is to create a separate cash cushion for emergencies that potentially come up due to spending habits. Additionally, you should also consider cutting back on other items so the spender won’t feel stressed about his or her spending.

Being responsible with finances is very important.

Following these five tips should help you find understanding and compromise with the spender in your life. Just remember to make plans and decisions together that are comfortable for BOTH of you.

How do you better understand spenders? Or if you are spender, how can others better understand you?

Reelika is an entrepreneur and the founder of Financially Wise On Heels. She is a happy wife and mom, Christian, financial management lover, and passionate about coaching. She provides inspiration, tools and resources to Moms to better plan, budget and manage their finances without sacrificing the needs and dreams of their families.

photo source

Guest post from Rachel

As someone who is fairly organized, occasionally even bordering on obsessive-compulsive, I had always just assumed that my grasp on budgeting and keeping track of my finances was fairly solid.

I’ve seen numerous friends and relatives struggle with spending outside of their means, but this has never felt like a struggle to me or my family. We don’t go on vacation particularly often, and when we do, it’s after finding a good deal on Groupon or the like; we don’t eat out except for special occasions; we don’t buy expensive clothing.

But I’ve found that it’s so easy to delude ourselves into thinking that if we aren’t spending on big things, then we aren’t overspending on small things either. However, this could not be further from the truth!

How could it be that I, the woman who spends hours researching hotels and airfare to find the best possible price, could be so lax about my spending in other, smaller, day-to-day areas?

The answer is simply: it just doesn’t seem worth it at the time.

In the moment, spending $3 or $4 on a cup of coffee seems like a small splurge to make, a small price to pay, for living in the moment. But a bit of careful planning would actually demonstrate how easy it is to get in the habit of letting these small charges grow and grow until they are no longer so small.

I’ve read countless articles on this topic over the years, all with the same message of how cutting corners here and there can yield large savings in the long run. I just never found it applicable to my own life until I spent one week where I wrote down literally every purchase I made.

$27 filling up gas

$78 on groceries

$7 for the café bill with my friend

$13 thanks to the bookshop next to the café 🙂

None of these sound unreasonable just yet… right?

Until I really stopped to think about it, none of my purchases sounded outlandish. What’s a few dollars in the big scheme of things, really?

But slowly, small realizations started creeping in on me. That $13 book is something I could have just as easily taken out of the library if I had been patient enough to reserve it instead of feeling the need to start reading it right then and there.

The $78 grocery shopping would have been cheaper if I’d been willing to go across town to the slightly less expensive, but slightly more crowded, supermarket.

I continued writing down each purchase, both the large and the small, and began noticing more trends in my own spending.

Becoming more aware of these little habits has helped me cut down on so many unnecessary expenses… even if it only saves me a few dollars each week, that really adds up over the course of a year.

I’ve continued to write down each purchase as I make it, which really forces me to stop and think about whether what I’m buying is absolutely necessary; and if it is, if I’m buying it at this particular shop due to its price or merely due to convenience.

The best news is – with all the money I’ve saved over the past year, we’re now looking to book another mini-vacation over winter break! Looks like it’s time to scour Groupon for the latest travel deals.

And you can bet that I’ll keep writing our purchases down even on vacation! Once you get in the good habit of writing everything down, it’s not something you want to break! Plus, it makes you really appreciate those things you do choose to spend your hard-earned cash on all the more.

Rachel teaches third graders, and in her spare time she enjoys writing, practicing yoga, and spending time with her loved ones; one day she will perfect the art of doing all three at the same time. Rachel calls the Midwest home, where she aims to live as naturally as possible.

photo source

Guest post from Carly of Happy The Home

Like me, I’m sure many of you would love a $1,000 shopping spree to your favorite clothing store. Truth be told, some of us would be happy to spend $50 or $100! But for most of us, we can’t spend a lot of money on a whole new wardrobe at the drop of a hat.

A few months ago, I began trying to simplify things in my life and home in an effort to spend more time doing things that are important to me. I wanted more time for Bible study, so I get up earlier. I wanted less laundry, so I minimized my kid’s clothes. Now it was my closet’s turn. But OH MY! It was not going to be easy.

I looked for ideas and found good blogs and articles for help with what to keep and what to get rid of. The What I Wore blog, and How to Build a Capsule Wardrobe were very helpful. Additionally, I texted my sister for her advice, as she always looks cute and we tend to like the same things! I also made some rules of my own.

My 6 “Rules” for a Minimalist Wardrobe

1. I won’t keep something if it’s uncomfortable or doesn’t fit me well.

2. I won’t buy anything new (at least not for a while).

3. I won’t feel bad keeping some of my favorite t shirts and gym clothes, but I will sort through them.

4. I won’t consider any “dry clean only” items except coats.

5. I won’t hang on to gifted clothing simply due to nostalgia.

6. I won’t keep anything because it “might fit if I lost a few pounds”.

With those rules in mind I also looked through my clothes by pulling EVERYTHING out of my closet and dresser. I decided to keep the following:

• 6 pants
• 8 blouses
• 8 sweaters/cardigans
• 4 skirts
• 4 dresses
• 3 vests
• 5 scarves
• 4 pair of shoes
• 2 belts
• 2 tights

I don’t think there’s a magic number to how many items of clothing one should have… and the pictures I took are merely to show how many things you can create with a few of these items.

What you see in the pictures are: 3 pants + 5 shirts + 2 jackets + 1 dress + 1 scarf + 3 pair of shoes

By no means have I exhausted the possibilities, but it’s exciting to think that I can do more with less. I want to simplify to make things easier and I don’t want my life to be characterized by “excess” and “disorganization”.

You might decide to keep way less than I did. But this is a start for me. Hope you enjoy watching a fashionably-impaired person enjoy a day of dress up!

Carly is a stay-at-home mother to four boys. She blogs at Happy The Home about faith, family, homemaking and all that lies between!