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Money Saving Mom

Money Saving Mom®

Saving Families Money Since 2007

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Shared Jul 8, 2016 comment

When it feels like there’s nothing we can do…

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When it feels like there’s nothing we can do…

Published: by on   |  This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.

When it feels like there's nothing we can do...

My husband and I stayed up late last night watching the news unfold in Dallas on a livestream online. And our hearts are heavy over all of the events of this past week. So heavy.

It feels like there’s nothing we can do. And yet, I woke up this morning realizing that there IS something we can do.

We can choose to be peacemakers. Right where we are.

Who will join me? We might not be able to change the world at large, but we can make a difference in our little piece of it.

Instead of holding grudges and dwelling on the negativity, let’s reach out with open arms of compassion to ALL whom we come in contact with today.

Let’s choose love, forgiveness, and kindness. The world is in great need of this… and it doesn’t cost us a penny to give it. But it just might radically change someone’s life — including our own!

P.S. I encourage you to read this post by Jen Hatmaker and also watch my periscope video from this morning. 

Shared Jul 7, 2016 comment

Love the life you actually HAVE instead of wishing for the life she has

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Love the life you actually HAVE instead of wishing for the life she has

Published: by on   |  This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.

For 15 days, we’re exploring the topic of making our health and well-being a priority as part of the 15 Days to a Healthier You series. You can read Day 1 here and Day 2 here. 

The #1 Way to NOT Be Happy

We can stop trying to be someone we’re not. Happiness begins in that moment, when we look within and say, “I was not created to be her; I was created to be me”. Happiness is an inside job. You don’t find happiness by being the best version of someone else; you find happiness by being the best version of you. –The Happiness Dare

If you want to succeed at not being happy, I’ve got the guaranteed path to accomplishing that: try to live someone else’s life.

Spend your days comparing yourself to her. Wish you could be her. Do everything you can to be like her.

This will make you feel so unhappy. You’ll probably feel frustrated that you just can’t do it like she does. You’ll probably beat yourself up over the fact that you’re not as good as her. And you’ll stress over not measuring up.

Or, you can choose to be YOU. To focus on making the most of where you are. To intentionally cultivate the ground right where you are. To do all you can to be the best version of you.

I loved the encouragement in The Happiness Dare to stop trying to feel like we had to try to do what makes other people happy and fulfilled and instead find our own happy spot.

Don’t look at others and think, “It makes her happy to garden, so I should do that, too!” By all means, if the thought of planting and weeding and harvesting sounds amazing to you, go do it (even if that is just with a little container garden on your porch!).

But if the whole gardening thing sounds utterly boring and exhausting to you, please give yourself the grace to not feel obligated in any way to become a Master Gardener. Unless you want to be miserable.

You have to figure out your own happy spot, instead of thinking that what will bring someone else joy and fulfillment is also going to bring you the same joy and fulfillment. Don’t try to be her, because you aren’t her.

Loving the Life I Actually Have

I’ve wasted much of my life pining away for a different time, a different season, a different set of circumstances.

No more.

I’m committing to love my actual life. The one I’m really living. Right here. Right now. Today.

It’s sometimes messy. It’s sometimes disorganized. And I rarely get everything done that I hope to in a day, but that doesn’t mean I can’t embrace it, savor it, and fall in love with it.

It’s a gift. All of it. And the more I choose to see it as such, the more I notice the gifts and the beauty all around me.

So many people have asked me in the past week after reading this post of mine, “How do I figure out what makes me come alive and feel happy? I don’t even know where to start. How did you figure out what to even try and experiment with?”

If you feel like that, I encourage you to ask yourself these questions:

  • What makes me feel happy?
  • If I had an entire day to myself and napping wasn’t an option (!), what would I choose to do?
  • What are some of my happiest memories?
  • What do other people say to brings life to me and puts a smile on my face?

As I’ve been taking the Happiness Dare, I’m realizing that there are so many beautiful things all around us, but often, I’ve been too busy and focused on productivity that I’ve missed them. This dare has really challenged me to look around my world and find the happy. To add more shots of joy into my every day life. To wring the delight out of what might seem ordinary.

I’m letting myself take time to slow down and enjoy a bike ride, to buy those discounted flowers, really be in the moment in a conversation, to savor the beauty of the ocean, to slowly enjoy books, to eat more ice cream, to wear colors I love, to stop saying to myself, “That’s not who you are!”

My daughter said to me the other day, “Mom, you’ve been laughing a lot more recently!” I know she’s right.

By intentionally seeking to do things that make me smile more, I have a lot more joy in my life. And I think this joy is becoming contagious!

We can’t change who we are, but we can make the most of our situation. We can’t choose the personality we are born with, but we can choose to be thankful–even in the midst of difficulty.

And we can choose to be intentional and purposeful in how we live our lives so that we make the most of all that we’ve been given instead of wishing we were someone else.

Loving My Actual LifeNote: Want to talk more about this with me live? I’d love to have you join me on Periscope (around 8 to 8:15 a.m. CT) and Facebook live (around 8:30 a.m. CT) every morning where we’ll be discussing each day’s topics more in-depth and you can bring your questions, chat with others, and we can share together what we’re learning! (You can watch today’s Facebook Live video here.)

Day 3 Project

  1. Look around you. Really look around you. Notice the wonderful things in your life. Let yourself stop and really savor those blessings. Don’t take them for granted!
  2. Ask yourself the following questions (if you need extra help, ask your spouse or a close friend): 
    • What makes me feel happy?
    • If I had an entire day to myself and napping wasn’t an option (!), what would I choose to do?
    • What are some of my happiest memories?
    • What do other people say to brings life to me and puts a smile on my face?
  3. Based upon your answers, what’s one simple way you can seek to cultivate more happiness in your every day life today? Tell us in the comments! I can’t wait to hear what you come up with!

Resources to Check Out:

Shared Jul 6, 2016 comment

Why we’ve GOT to re-define the term “self-care”

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Why we’ve GOT to re-define the term “self-care”

Published: by on   |  This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.

For 15 days, we’re exploring the topic of making our health and well-being a priority as part of the 15 Days to a Healthier You series. You can read Day 1 here.

Prioritizing Self-Care

Before we go any further in this series, I think it’s important that we define self-care. It’s a term that gets bandied around a lot and I think it is often misused and abused.

The reality is this: I don’t want to just survive life. Thus, I’m not looking for survival tactics.

I want to thrive. I want to live life as my best, boldest, and bravest self. I want to live up to my fullest potential.

Yesterday I talked about the importance of making our health and well-being a priority, but I want to be clear: I’m not making self-care a priority so I can cope with life. I don’t want to limp along through life just trying to make it.

I want to prioritize self-care so I can succeed in life. So I can grow stronger, embrace life more fully, love more enthusiastically, live more generously, and serve others more wholeheartedly.

The Difference Between Self-Care & Self-Comfort

I heard Megan and Kelly on the Sorta Awesome show recently discussing the differences between self-care and self-comfort and I thought it was really profound. I think it’s important that we define what this looks like in our own life. It can be easy to confuse the two.

What Self-Care Is: Making our health and well-being a priority. Listening to and attending to what our body and soul needs so that we are able to live our lives with energy and purpose.

What Self-Care Isn’t: Numbing ourselves from reality, using coping mechanisms, or turning to addictive behavior to try to survive life.

To help you understand where I’m coming from with this, let me give you a really practical example. Let’s say your child fell down and skinned their knee and it was bleeding pretty seriously. Yes, you should comfort your child, but you also need to care for your child by getting the bleeding to stop, getting medical attention (if necessary), and bandaging up the wound.

Comfort can be very important, but it’s not enough if our souls are bleeding. We can’t just slap a warm hug or chocolate ice cream and a chick flick on as a bandage labeled “self-care” and think that all will be well.

No, we need to stop the bleeding. And often, that means we first need to determine where the bleeding is actually coming from in the first place.

To me, this is what self-care is. It’s not a temporary fix that might make you feel better in the moment but does nothing for you long-term. Self-care is dealing with root causes, healing from deep wounds, and working on permanent solutions to struggles.

Pay Attention to the Pain; Listen to Your Tears

Until you are willing to admit there is pain, you can’t figure out where it’s coming from or how to fix it. So today, I want you to get really honest with yourself and ask: What’s bleeding? Where does it hurt? Am I trying to cope with life because I’d rather avoid a painful situation? Am I self-medicating in some way in order to mask what I’m really feeling deep down?

That’s how you get to the heart of what’s hurting and discover where the pain points are. These answers might not be obvious at first. They might require some intense soul-searching. They might dredge up things you’d rather stuff down and pretend don’t exist. They might invoke tears or a knot at the pit of your stomach.

Pay attention to the tears. Pay attention to the anxiety rising inside of you. Don’t dismiss it. Don’t run from it.

Instead, when you feel the tears or the anxiety, stop and let yourself stay in it. Ask yourself, “Where is this coming from? What triggered this? Why am I feeling this?”

What does your soul need??

What Does Your Soul Need?

Remember how yesterday we talked about how taking care of ourselves will look different for different people and I encouraged you to make a list of what energizes you? Today, I want to drill down further and I want you to really ask yourself, “What does my soul need?”

This is a question I’ve really been asking myself the past 6 months as part of my Year of Rest.

I’ve talked about the Year of Rest multiple times on the blog and on social media. So many people have commented with things like, “I’m sure that’s been amazing!” Or, “Are you feeling all rested and refreshed?” Or, “It must be so incredible.”

The truth is: It has been wonderful — but not at all in the way I was expecting. I was expecting a year of rest to be filled with more sleep, more time with my family, more fun, more reading, more time for things I love. And it has been that… and that’s been wonderful.

But what has completely caught me off guard is that it’s also been a year of ugly crying. I’m not a crier, usually. I can be the only one in a group to experience something deeply touching without ever shedding a tear. I’m known to be stoic and non-emotional.

That’s all changed this year, however. I’ve probably cried more tears than I have in all the past 20 years put together.

As I’ve been weaning myself off my addiction to “hustle” and intentionally sought quietness and stillness in my life, I’ve struggled to figure out who I am without all of the noise, the accolades, and the accomplishing.

I’ve realized that the busyness was a bandage I tried to slap on. Instead of addressing deep wounds and aches and longings in my soul; I tried to medicate with productivity.

It felt good in the moment. It numbed the pain. It filled the empty spaces. And as long as I kept up the out-of-breath living, I didn’t have to confront the reality or deal with the broken parts of me I’d rather hide.

I realized that instead of dealing with the pain and hurt and hard situations of life over the past number of years, I’d stuffed them down deep, pretended they didn’t exist, and heaped on more busyness to distract myself.

What Self-Care Looks Like in This Season for Me

As I’ve asked myself, “What does my soul need?” I’ve realized that self-care in this season has been me allowing myself to cry. Allowing myself space to really feel. To acknowledge the pain. To open up with safe friends in safe spaces about how much my heart feels broken by situations in my past.

Self-care has meant letting other people see the under-belly of who I really am. It’s meant welcoming people into the authentic messiness and rawness and not apologizing.

It’s been ugly and real… and oh so healing for me! Allowing myself the space and permission to feel, the permission to acknowledge the pain, and welcoming people in to see that I’m a broken, hot mess some days, has made me so much stronger, happier, and healthier than I’ve been in, well, probably ever.

Self-care has also looked like making weight-lifting a priority, giving myself permission to gain a little weight, becoming more spontaneous, working a whole lot less, experimenting with new things, saying “yes” to what once would have seemed way too crazy for me, sleeping more, and making space for a whole lot more fun in my life. {Read more about all of this here.}

We've got to re-define "self-care"

Note: Want to talk more about this with me live? I’d love to have you join me on Periscope (around 8 to 8:15 a.m. CT) and Facebook live (around 8:30 a.m. CT) every morning where we’ll be discussing each day’s topics more in-depth and you can bring your questions, chat with others, and we can share together what we’re learning! (You can watch today’s Facebook Live video here.)

Day 2 Project

  1. Is there deep pain or past wounds you’ve been trying to stuff down, hide, or run from for a long time? Give yourself permission to acknowledge these, cry about them, grieve your losses, and process the hurt with a safe person. {If you feel comfortable sharing in the comments section here, I welcome that. You are also more than welcome to email me privately if you’d like a safe place to share. I would be honored to listen and pray for you.}
  2. Ask yourself, “What does my soul need?” Give yourself time and space to really contemplate and ponder that question. If you feel comfortable, tell us in the comments section what self-care looks like for you in this season of life.

Resources to Check Out:

Shared Jul 5, 2016 comment

Yes, It’s Time You Start Taking Care of YOU!

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Yes, It’s Time You Start Taking Care of YOU!

Published: by on   |  This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.

Are you worn down, worn out, overwhelmed, and exhausted? Or maybe you’re not completely burnt out, but you feel like you could use a little extra energy or that extra boost to take better care of yourself?

The next 15 days, we’re going to be talking about how to take care of you as part of a 15 Days to a Healthier You series I’m running here on the blog. I hope you’ll join us!

15 Days to a Healthier You

Taking Care of You is Important

As busy moms, wives, and women, I know how easy it is for us to put ourselves and our health as a last priority. There’s always something that seems more important, more pressing, more necessary.

But the truth is, if we don’t take care of ourselves, we aren’t going to be able to serve others as effectively. Because if we’re just barely functioning ourselves, how are we going to have anything worthwhile to be able to pour into others?

A number of years ago, I read the book Leading on Empty and it had a profound impact on my life. While the book was written by a pastor specifically for leaders and church leaders, I found I related to a lot of what he shared.

One of my favorite pieces of advice from the book was when he talked about making a list of what energizes you and what depletes you. Even though it’s been quite a few years since I read the book, I still remember the little yellow lined notebook paper I wrote out my list on and I well remember how difficult it was for me to think of what actually energized me.

This exercise was extremely eye-opening to me. I realized I had a long, long list of things in my life that were draining me. But more important than that, I realized I struggled to even come up with one thing in my life that energized me.

That’s when I knew something had to change. I couldn’t just keep doing the same thing and expecting that somehow I was going to get different results and feel less exhausted and run down.

15 Days to a Healthier You

 

Taking Care of You is Not Selfish

Taking care of ourselves is actually a gift we give to others. It allows us to be more energetic, more vibrant, more excited about life, less irritable, more focused, and probably more fun to be around!

Contrary to how it might feel or what we might tell ourselves, putting ourselves last hurts other people in the long run.

When we are worn down, worn out, and wrung out, other people are going to have to come in and pick us up when we collapse and help carry our load or try to nurse us back to health. When we’ve gone for a really long time without taking care of ourselves, it’s likely going to take a long time to get our health back. We can prevent this on the front end by just making taking care of ourselves more of a priority!

I want you to think back over the last few weeks of your life and consider if you engaged in activities that were mostly depleting you, mostly energizing you, or if you had a healthy mix of both. A healthy life will have give and take; enough refueling stops to make up for all of the fuel expended.

15 Days to a Healthier You

“Taking Care of You” Looks Different for Different People

Here’s the important thing to remember: what energizes you will be very different than what energizes someone else.

I’m energized by quiet, reading an engaging book, watching a movie with my husband, a great one-on-one conversation with a close friend, writing a blog post, cleaning my house, adult coloring, hanging out and talking and laughing with people we know really well, exercise, listening to my favorite music, and tinkering in the kitchen.

I’m depleted by large crowds, phone calls, shopping, a go-go-go lifestyle, lots of noise, nonstop questions and needs from my kids or others, being “on” (such as on camera or on stage or at an event), any situation where there are a lot of people, or almost any situation that is new and unfamiliar.

You may have just read my lists and thought, “I am JUST like her!” or “I am NOT like her at all!” or “I’m like her in some ways and very different than her in other ways.”

That’s the beauty of how we’re all unique and different. None of us is a carbon copy of each other and we don’t need to be.

I want you to recharge your batteries in the way that works best for you, not in the way that works best for me.

15 Days to a Healthier You

Note: Want to talk more about this with me live? I’d love to have you join me on Periscope (around 8 to 8:15 a.m. CT) and Facebook live (around 8:30 a.m. CT) every morning where we’ll be discussing each day’s topics more in-depth and you can bring your questions, chat with others, and we can share together what we’re learning! (You can watch today’s Facebook Live video here.)

Day 1 Project

  1. What are your biggest hindrances keeping you from making your health and well-being a priority? Really think through these and tell us what you think they are in the comments.
  2. Make a list of things that refill your tank and things that deplete you. Share some of your list in the comments. I’m curious to hear if our lists are similar or very different!

Resources to Check Out:

Shared Jul 5, 2016 comment

“I feel so rich today!”

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“I feel so rich today!”

Published: by on   |  This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.

Free 5-day course on saving money with your smartphone

I loved this email from Krissy:

I recently received the last of your 5-day series on money-saving apps. Within 2-3 weeks I have redeemed points for a $20 Starbucks gift card, collected $1.50 on Checkout51, signed up for Walmart’s Savings Catcher and received back $1.18 from one shopping trip on items they found advertised for a lower price at other local stores!

As a bonus I found a $30 Target GiftCard that I misplaced from Christmas 2009. I feel so rich today 🙂 -Krissy

Have you signed up for our FREE printable on how to save (and make!) money with your smartphone? If not, sign up here… and hopefully it will help you save, make, and even find some money, too! 🙂

WANT TO SAVE $100 FAST?!Join the FREE 14-Day Savings Challenge!

Click here to sign up!
We paid cash!
Shared Jul 4, 2016 comment

How We Paid Off $30,000 Worth of Debt

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How We Paid Off $30,000 Worth of Debt

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We paid cash!

A testimony from Autumn

My husband and I married at the early age of only 18. We were young and in love with each other — and with credit cards! As you might imagine, the love of credit cards got us in some serious trouble!

Fast forward three years and we had over $30,000 in credit card debt PLUS two car notes. Bad, bad idea! We had gotten ourselves in over our heads.

We knew something had to change!

It felt like a heavy load on my shoulders every time the phone rang because I knew that it would be another debt collector. Life had truly spiraled out of control for us. We realized how true, “The borrower is slave to the lender,” really is!

We decided to make some changes… some very big changes! We went through Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace University course, where we learned about the, “debt snowball” technique. We had to hit it fast and furious! We had no other choice!

At that time we had a rental property, and the current renters had not paid us for almost 4 months. This meant our mortgage for the rental property wasn’t being met either. So, the first line of business was to sell it off. Then we celebrated with a credit card destruction party (AKA cutting up the cards).

We took the minimal profit from the sale of our rental and applied it towards some of our smaller bills (per the debt snowball protocol). From there we went on a tight budget like no other!

unnamed-1

We did things such as:

  • Ate Mac N’ Cheese several nights in a row.
  • Said, “no” to extra-curricular activities we couldn’t afford.
  • Took advantage of free entertainment (ie. swimming and taking the kids to the park)
  • Made crafts out of some interesting materials from home.
  • Shopped for deals and thoroughly researched to find the best price possible.
  • Took advantage of holiday sales. Sometimes this meant waiting. But, the savings was worth it.
  • Worked extra hours — my husband even got an extra job delivering pizzas!
  • Sold things that we didn’t need.
  • Went on free “dates” at home (usually a movie on TV).
  • Cut back on all unnecessary expenses .

It took us almost three years to overcome the mess that we had gotten ourselves into.

It was painful. It was stressful. It was very HARD WORK! But, it was well worth the financial freedom! It’s exciting to say that we are now debt-free, other than our mortgage!

unnamed

Since we no longer have debt looming over us, we have been able to pay for my new invention (an interchangeable jewelry line) with cash thus far.

Autumn Spitzke is the Owner and Designer of Darling Dazzles. She has been married to her best friend for almost 20 years and is the mother of two teenage daughters, ages 17 and 14.

Have you saved up and paid cash for something — large or small? Submit your story for possible publication here.

Shared Jul 4, 2016 comment

How to stop exhausting yourself

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How to stop exhausting yourself

Published: by on   |  This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.

How to stop exhausting yourself

Wise words from Emily Freeman.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve exhausted myself trying to please or impress someone else.

The thing is, people-pleasing is a never-ending game of exhaustion: there’s no finish line and you just have to keep working harder and harder to try to get the same results.

Let’s focus on loving people well — exactly as we are. It’s much more vulnerable, but it’s a lot more fulfilling and a lot less exhausting!

Shared Jul 2, 2016 comment

5 Things I’m Loving This Week

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5 Things I’m Loving This Week

Published: by on   |  This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.

5 Things I'm Loving This Week

1) Shopping With Kaitlynn

This girl. She turned 9 last week and chose going to the mall (+ manicures!) as her Mother-Daughter birthday date. She agonized over finding just the right pair of earrings at Claire’s and the perfect shade of lipstick at Sephora.

While she is my mini me in so many respects, in other respects we could not be more opposite — like when it comes to all things jewelry, fashion, and makeup.

I go into Claire’s and Sephora and feel so overwhelmed by all the options that I want to leave immediately. She goes into those stores and sees a world of beauty and possibility just waiting to be discovered and tried out. I love the creativity, artistry, energy, and love of beauty she brings into our home and lives.

5 Things I'm Loving This Week

2) Free Audiobooks From the Library

We’ve been investigating audiobook site memberships recently because our whole family has really gotten into listening to audiobooks — both separately and together (especially while driving in the car to and from swimming and skating). We were going to try out the free 3-month Audible subscription, but then we realized that we’d probably get more bang for our buck with a subscription to ChristianAudio.com.

I was sharing about this on my new daily money-saving live show on FB and a few viewers suggested we look into our local library to see if they happen to offer a free audiobook service. We were THRILLED to discover that they do and it’s SO easy to access. Plus, they have an amazing selection of audiobooks… for FREE! Score!

I started Big Magic today and am really, really enjoying it so far. I can’t wait to enjoy a lot of other titles in the coming weeks and months — both personally and as a family.

5 Things I'm Loving This Week

3) A Baby Picture of My Husband

It’s hard to believe that’s my husband. That little baby in the incubator, born at 27 weeks because his mom had an incompetent cervix, weighing less than two pounds… That’s the strong, resilient, energetic man I’m married to.

There are days when I get frustrated at him. I say harsh words. I have to ask forgiveness. I take him for granted.

And then I find a picture like this in our memory box and I catch my breath and remember what a miracle it is that he’s even alive!
How often I can get caught up in the tasks and to-do’s of life and take the precious people in my life for granted. And then a picture like this reminds me that all the productivity in the world is never as important as the people in my life. I want to hold them tight and love them well today.

5 Things I'm Loving This Week

4) Pineapple Mint Water

This week’s flavored water of choice: Pineapple Mint. So refreshing!

Aldi had pineapple for 99 cents and we have mint in our container garden, so this was an especially frugal infused water option. It’s amazing how inspired we are to drink more water when it’s all “fancy” like this!

5 Things I'm Loving This Week

5) Indoor Rock Climbing

This year, I’ve challenged myself to jump out of my comfort zone and try new things: weight-lifting, live video on Periscope and Facebook Live, traveling to two new countries by myself, snow-boarding, and hand-lettering… and this week I joined SnapChat (I’m crystal.paine there and I have no idea what I’m doing so you can laugh along with me as I try to figure it out! ?) and my husband and I went on a date to an indoor rock climbing place.

It was my first time to try indoor rock wall climbing and we had a lot of fun trying it out together. It was especially memorable because the A/C was out in the building and it was a really hot day… so that made the workout a little more intense. 😉

In trying these new things, here’s what I’m learning: I’m not going to love everything new I attempt, but challenging myself to get brave and just jump out and try — even when it scares me or I think I won’t like it or be good at it — has stretched me as a person and shown me that I’m stronger than I think I am.

Best of all, I’ve discovered a few things I absolutely love that I never thought I would and would have never known that I would fall in love with them had I not tried them and stuck with them for a few weeks (i.e. weight-lifting and live video).

I’ve missed out on a lot in life by sitting on the sidelines in the safe zone. I don’t want to camp out there anymore! There’s a world of excitement and thrill and color just waiting to be discovered… Right outside my comfort zone!

What are YOU loving this week? Tell us in the comments!

Shared Jul 2, 2016 comment

5 Days to a Better Morning Challenge (Day 5)

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5 Days to a Better Morning Challenge (Day 5)

Published: by on   |  This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.

5DaysToABetterMorning-JoinTheChallenge-Pinnable

Welcome to Day 5 of the 5 Days to a Better Morning Challenge! I’m so excited that so many of you committed to join me in this journey. If you missed the first posts in this series, read Day 1 here, Day 2 here, Day 3 here and Day 4 here.

It’s the final day of this 5-Day series! Thanks so much for joining me on this journey and sharing your encouraging comments along the way. You’ve blessed and inspired me through what you’ve shared.

I want to close out this series by sharing two final techniques for setting up your day for success — both which have made a major difference in my own life:

Lay Out Clothes

One of the habits I implemented a few years ago that has made a huge difference in my mornings is choosing clothes and laying them out the night before. Not only does this eliminate decision fatigue in the morning and make it so simple to get dressed, but it also guarantees I have clean clothes to wear. {Maybe you can relate to that panic moment when you realize you need to be out the door in 20 minutes and the shirt you were planning to wear is not in your closet but at the bottom of the dirty clothes pile??}

The other added benefit of laying out my clothes the night before is that it makes it much easier for me to dress for the day I want to have. I lay out my clothes all the way down to jewelry so that it makes it so easy in the morning to just grab the stack of clothes and get dressed. No decisions to make at all!

I’ve found that simplifying my wardrobe makes it much easier to quickly choose outfits that I love and that make me feel great. (Read more about how I keep my wardrobe simple and ways I’ve figured out what colors/styles work best for me here.)

If you need some encouragement to simplify your wardrobe, I highly recommend watching this video on the 10-item wardrobe. I also love these Rules for a Minimalist Wardrobe and Andrea’s post on her Mix & Match Wardrobe.

Organizing Young Kids' Clothes

If you want to really make your mornings easier, have your kids lay out their clothes at night, too. (When my girls were little, I used a Day of the Week Closet Organizer and just picked out all their outfits for the week when I put the laundry away. This made it so easy for them to get dressed in the mornings!)

Wind Down Earlier

I’ve found that it takes me about an hour to wind down and go to sleep, so if I want to go to bed by 9:30 p.m., I need to start winding down around 8:30 p.m. In the past, I would start thinking about going to bed right around the time I actually wanted to be in bed going to sleep… which meant that I almost always stayed up later than I should have!

I’ve been very intentional about making winding down earlier a priority this year and it’s made such a difference. One of my favorite things to do is to wind down with some sort of pampering (see below). This helps me relax and shut my brain off so I can fall into a deep sleep.

Some of My Favorite Before-Bed Pampering Rituals:

Peace & Calming Essential Oils

Another strategy that has been so helpful is for me take email off of my phone. I used to instinctively check my email right before bed and feel like I needed to deal with it right away, which always prevented me from winding down and relaxing because my brain wouldn’t shut down properly.

Now I try to shut down the computer mid to late afternoon and not turn it back on until the following day after breakfast. This not only helps my brain take a rest from business stuff for me to be offline for at least 12 to 15 hours each day, but it also makes it much easier for me to shut off my sometimes hyper-active brain at night so I can fall asleep!

And finally, one of my most effective techniques for winding down at night is to take few minutes to write down everything I need to do that day or feel like I need to do. Getting it all out of my head onto paper is such a helpful exercise. (Read this post here for all the details on how I do this and how I create a prioritized to-do list for the next day.)

Note: If you struggle with sleep, be sure to read my post on How to Get More Sleep and my post on How to Sleep Restfully for lots of practical ideas and tips.

Day 5 Project

1. Follow your Morning Routine and check in with your accountability partner to let them know how it’s going. Leave a comment to let us know how you’re doing. (And if you’ve not created your Morning Routine yet, be sure to go here and follow the steps and then leave a comment on this post letting us know your plan!)

2. Lay out your clothes for tomorrow and pick one idea to implement to wind down earlier or help you go to bed more relaxed. Tell us in the comments what idea you chose and how it went for you!

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5 Days to a Better Morning Challenge (Day 4)

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5 Days to a Better Morning Challenge (Day 4)

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Welcome to Day 4 of the 5 Days to a Better Morning Challenge! I’m so excited that so many of you committed to join me in this journey. If you missed the first posts in this series, read Day 1 here, Day 2 here, and Day 3 here. 

I’m a firm believer that a successful morning begins the night before. When you go to bed at a decent hour, with a plan for the next day, and with everything that you can prepped for the next day, you’re giving yourself a huge jumpstart on the next day. Plus, you’ll likely wake up feeling organized, calm, and focused.

Here are two things you can do to prep for a great tomorrow:

Plan Your Breakfast

If you wake up in the morning and have breakfast all planned and prepped ahead of time, it makes mornings SO much easier. Often, it truly only takes 5 or 10 minutes of planning and prep work the night before, but can make a huge difference in the morning!

We’ve done different things at different seasons and I think it’s important to figure out what works for you and your family. I’m really spoiled right now in that Jesse makes breakfast for us every morning. He loves it and it allows me to read aloud to the kids while he’s cooking breakfast.

Instead of making breakfast the night before, we rotate through three different breakfast options that can all be made in 15 minutes or less: bacon & eggs, oatmeal, or Cream of Wheat. Each of these are filling and we all like them. Plus, they don’t make much of a mess to make.

5 Days to a Better Morning

Baked Oatmeal is one of staple Make Ahead breakfasts. We all love it, plus, you can whip up a batch in under 10 minutes and stick it in the refrigerator overnight and then just stick it in the oven to bake in the morning.

A few years ago, when we were in a different season of life, we had oatmeal every single morning for breakfast. The kids learned how to make it and I’d just oversee while they’d each make their own bowl. It was cheap, simple, and clean up was a breeze.

When the kids were younger and Jesse had already left for work by breakfast time, I relied on Make Ahead Breakfasts — like Baked Oatmeal, Pancakes or Waffles from the Freezer, or sometimes cereal.

My encouragement to you is to figure out what you think will work for you and your family and then make a plan accordingly. Try it for a few weeks. If it doesn’t work, go back to the drawing board and try again!

Prep the Lunches

If you need to go somewhere the next day and you’ll be gone during lunch time, go ahead and pack lunches the night before. You can do this while you’re making dinner or right after dinner (before you clean up the kitchen). If you weave it right into your dinner or post-dinner efforts, it probably won’t feel like much extra effort, but it could really save you a lot of stress the next day.

An added benefit is that you won’t be tempted to hit up the drive-thru the next day or be pulling your hair out trying to concoct a lunch out of thin air two minutes before you have to be pulling out of the driveway.

Screen Shot 2016-06-30 at 11.52.14 AM

Need some ideas? Here are a few of our favorite make-ahead lunch options:

Looking for more make-ahead sack lunch ideas? Check out my Lunchbox Freezer Cooking series.

What are YOUR favorite quick & easy breakfast and lunch ideas? I’d love to hear!

Day 4 Project

1. Follow your Morning Routine and check in with your accountability partner to let them know how it’s going. Leave a comment to let us know how you’re doing. (And if you’ve not created your Morning Routine yet, be sure to go here and follow the steps and then leave a comment on this post letting us know your plan!)

2. Prep your breakfast and lunch for tomorrow. Tell us in the comments your simple plan for how you’re going to follow through with it (Such as, “I’m going to prep breakfast before bed. I’m going to make a pan of Baked Oatmeal to stick in the fridge overnight.”)

pancakes

Make Ahead Pancake Batter is one of our favorite quick & easy “fancy” breakfasts.

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Shared Jul 1, 2016 comment

Give yourself permission to REST

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Give yourself permission to REST

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Burning the candle at both ends doesn't make you superwoman; it makes you exhausted.

Burning the candle at both ends doesn’t make you superwoman; it makes you exhausted.

Give yourself permission to rest and take care YOU today so that you can more effectively serve and pour into others.

Shared Jul 1, 2016 comment

Gretchen’s $56 Grocery Shopping Trip and Weekly Menu Plan

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Gretchen’s $56 Grocery Shopping Trip and Weekly Menu Plan

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IMG_1334

Aldi

2 dozen Eggs – $0.99 each

1 loaf Bread – $0.85

1 pkg Hamburger Buns – $0.69

1 gallon Milk – $1.89

1 Cantaloupe – $0.99

2 Cucumbers – $0.69 each, used $0.25/1 Checkout rebate – $0.56 each after rebate

1 pkg Roma Tomatoes – $1.69

1 pkg Flour Tortillas – $1.19

2 pkg Strawberries – $1.29 each

1 pkg Oats – $2.39

1 pkg Rice Cakes – $1.29

1 pkg Butter – $2.99

1 pkg Graham Crackers – $1.29

1 pkg Cream Cheese – $1.29

1 pkg Zucchini – $0.99

2 pkg Blueberries – $0.99 each

Total after rebate: $27.25

IMG_1335

Dillons

2 Sweet Baby Ray’s BBQ Sauce – $1.49 each

1 Psst Ketchup – $0.89

1 Kroger Frozen Orange Juice – $1

1 Kroger Flour – $1.79, used $0.40/1 e-coupon – $1.39 after coupon

1 Nature Bakery Fig Bar – $2.99

1 Honey Nut Cheerios – $1.49, used $1/1 printable – $0.49 after coupon

1 Romaine Lettuce – $0.99

2 Kroger Cottage Cheese – $0.99 each

1 Bai Bubbles – $1.67, used Free e-coupon (no longer available) – Free after coupon

1 lb Ground Beef – $3.99

2 Moms Best Cereal – $1.67 each, used $1.25/2 e-coupon – $1.04 each after coupon

2 Mott’s Fruit Snacks – $1.49 each, used $0.50/2 e-coupon and $0.50/2 SavingStar.com rebate – $0.99 each after coupon and rebate

1 pkg Kroger Frozen Boneless Skinless Chicken Breasts – $6.99, used $1.45/1 e-coupon – $5.54 after coupon

1.98 lbs Bananas – $1.17, used 20% off SavingStar.com rebate – $0.94 after rebate

1 pkg Heritage Farms Chicken Thighs – $3.44, used $1/1 e-coupon – $2.44 after coupon

Total after coupons and rebates: $29.68

Total for both stores: $56.93

Menu Plan for This Week

We still have some fruit and veggies leftover from last week so we will be eating that up this week.

Breakfasts

Cereal x 3

Eggs & Toast x 3

Buttermilk Blueberry Breakfast Cake (I make this every July 4th!)

Lunches

Macaroni & Cheese, Fruit

Peanut Butter & Jelly Rice Cake Sandwiches, Carrot Sticks, Cucumber Slices

Cheese Quesadillas, Fruit

Salad Bar, Cottage Cheese

Cheese, Crackers, Veggies, Fruit

Leftovers x 2

Dinners

Oven Fried Chicken, Mashed Potatoes, Green Beans

Hamburgers, Zucchini Fries, Chips

Chicken Philly Cheese Steaks, Cantaloupe, Tossed Salad

French Toast, Eggs, Sausage

Tacos, Rice, Fruit Salad

Dinner with family

Leftovers

Shared Jun 30, 2016 comment

5 Days to a Better Morning Challenge (Day 3)

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5 Days to a Better Morning Challenge (Day 3)

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Welcome to Day 3 of the 5 Days to a Better Morning Challenge! I’m so excited that so many of you committed to join me in this journey. If you missed the first posts in this series, read Day 1 here and Day 2 here.

For years, I ran myself ragged. I burned the candle at both ends. I thought that the best way to be more productive was to be as organized as possible, work as efficiently as possible, and get up really early.

Being organized, working efficiently, and getting up early can all be great things, but in my case, I forgot one very important truth: if I get up really early only to go throughout my day completely exhausted, I won’t be able to work anywhere near as efficiently and I won’t be able to stay at all as organized and focused.

Not only that, but not getting enough sleep for days and days and days on end is a surefire way to hurt your health and to probably also go through life feeling frazzled and irritable.

Today we’re going to talk about the importance of getting a great night’s sleep. I truly believe that this one of the keys to a better morning. When you wake up feeling refreshed, rested, and energetic, you’ve given yourself a huge head start for a fantastic day.

Ever since I first started blogging, I’ve known and preached the importance of good sleep. For years, it was something I really wanted to make happen and did try to make a priority, but between babies and toddlers and a business and life, it was hard for it to ever really consistently happen.

I love the quote that says, “If it’s important to you, you’ll find the time. If it’s not important to you, you’ll find an excuse.” This was true for me with sleep.

Even though I preached all about sleep and had amazing intentions to get good sleep, it was rare that I actually got a good night’s rest more than a few days in a row. And there were a number of periods of time where I ran on fumes for days on end and had to just keep pushing through in order to meet the deadlines and goals I had, follow through with my commitments, and still have time for my family.

I had bought into the lie that, “I had no other choice.” That I needed to say “yes” to these things in order to be a good businesswoman, a good friend, a strategic author, a good wife, a good mom.

Go to Bed Early Challenge: Want to join me?

In reality, I had brought almost all the stress, the to-do’s, and the tasks on myself. I had said “yes”, I had chosen to feel obligated, I had set those goals. I was the problem, but I was also the solution! I could choose to say “no”, I could choose to not feel obligated, and I could set fewer goals.

This Year of Rest has been bursting with lessons and a-ha moments. One of the greatest lessons for me has been that saying “no” to a bunch of things hasn’t ruined my life or my business. If anything, it’s made things so much better because I’m only doing a few things which means I can do those few things really, really well. And not just that, but I can also fully enjoy those few things instead of feeling stressed over what else I still have to do and what’s coming up right around the corner.

This breathing room in my life has giving me the space to start actually getting good sleep. Not just one good night’s rest here and there. No, it’s becoming very rare that I get less than six hours of sleep in a night and it’s becoming very normal for me to wake up before my alarm clock — something I basically never, ever did before.

2 Strategies for Better Sleep

If you’re struggling to get enough sleep at night, I want to challenge you to try these two strategies:

1. Learn Your Triggers

Are there specific things that are keeping you from getting a good night’s rest? Things that are either keeping you up at night or keeping you from going to bed at a decent hour or waking you up early in the morning?

Now obviously, those things might not be a thing; they might be a baby or a toddler who is waking up at night! I get that because that was my life for about six years. My nights were full of interruptions and crying babies needing to be fed.

But in that season, I also had other triggers: I was addicted to busyness and productivity. I felt worth from what I did. And I had bought into the lie of chasing after “more”.

So instead of getting up with the babies and then letting myself sleep in or take a nap to compensate, I got up early and worked through the baby’s naps. Because there was always so much to do… almost all of which I had put on myself.

As I’ve talked about before, I struggle with being a performer and a people-pleaser and this fed into how I short-changed my sleep.

I have been so challenged by Emily Freeman’s quote in Simply Tuesday: “When I’m performing for my own acceptance, burnout is always the result.”

If you’re feeling worn down and worn out, take a step back and examine if any of the exhaustion is a result of trying to earn someone else’s acceptance. Are you only saying “yes” to that opportunity because you want someone to like you? Are you only volunteering or sending that email or showing up for that event just so someone else will be impressed with you?

5 Days to a Better Morning Challenge

2. Track Your Sleep

One of the most helpful things I’ve done in the past two years is to start tracking my sleep. I always had a general idea of how much sleep I was getting, but actually tracking it really opened up my eyes in big ways.

I started out by tracking my sleep with the Sleep Cycle App. This is an app that you download and run on your phone during the night. You choose a 30-minute window of time when you’d like to wake up and then it tracks your sleep patterns (based upon your movements) and wakes you up when it’s the most optimum time during that window.

The Sleep Cycle app also tracks your sleep and gives you a report each day on your sleep cycles and how deep and restful your sleep was. You can read more how it works here.

While I found this to be a really great start, I felt like the tracking wasn’t as accurate or in-depth as I wanted. Sometimes when it would say I got great sleep, I didn’t feel like I had.

So I started researching other options. Though I had resisted getting a fitness tracker for a long time as they felt like such a “fad”, I finally caved and bought myself a Jawbone UP3 at the beginning of this year. I’m SO glad that I did as it truly made such a difference for me.

Not only have I found myself much, much more motivated to be active and get in more steps, I’ve found that the sleep tracking has been incredibly enlightening.

For instance, I’ve learned that when I go to bed hungry, I don’t sleep as well. I’ve also learned that it takes me a lot longer to actually go to sleep than I realized. So I’ve made adjustments to my schedule so that I’m in bed for at least 7 1/2 hours in order to get close to 7+ good hours of sleep.

I’ve also determined that stress and certain other factors result in a lot lighter sleep. So I’ve worked on eliminating as many of those things from my life — or at least around bedtime! — so that I’ll sleep more restfully.

In not only making sleep a priority, but also in making deep sleep a priority, I’ve discovered that I have much better focus, I feel a lot calmer, I’m a lot less irritable, and I’m a lot happier! And all of those things definitely help make for better mornings!

Day 3 Project

1. Think through what your triggers are that are keeping you from getting a great night’s sleep. Are there things you could avoid, remove, or eliminate from your life in order to cut down on hindrances to a good night’s sleep?

2. Start tracking your sleep and see what you learn from it. I recommend tracking it for at least two weeks so you can notice trends and see what’s working and what’s not working.

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Stop collecting information & go apply what you already know…

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Stop collecting information & go apply what you already know…

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Stop collecting information and go apply what you already know!

It’s so easy to get stuck in “collection mode”… book-reading, podcast-listening, idea-brainstorming, conference-going, blog-hopping… and never actually make it to “application mode”.

There are lots of amazing and interesting and wise voices out there sharing great ideas, but some days, I just have to tune them out and focus on flat-out getting stuff done.

Learning from the most experienced people in the market does nothing for you if you don’t actually go out and DO SOMETHING with what you learn.

Get brave and take that first tiny baby step! You can do it!

Shared Jun 28, 2016 comment

5 Days to a Better Morning Challenge (Day 2)

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5 Days to a Better Morning Challenge (Day 2)

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Welcome to Day 2 of the 5 Days to a Better Morning Challenge! I’m so excited that so many of you committed to join me in this journey. If you missed my first post for Day 1 you can read it here.

Today, I want you to take your answers to the three questions I had you ask yourself yesterday and we’re going to use those as the basis for creating a Realistic Routine.

3 Steps to a Successful Routine

Step 1: Start Out Small

The biggest mistake people make when trying to create a routine is that they bite off more than they can chew. If you’ve never had a routine before, please don’t decide that you’re now going to have your whole family on an every-15-minutes regimented schedule. That’s setting yourself up for failure and frustration from the get-go.

Instead, start out small. Choose your start time, your out-the-door time, and your Big Rocks. Then, flesh this out into a simple routine.

Sample Routines

Example #1: Let’s say you’re a single woman who works full-time and your start time is 6:30 a.m., your out-the-door time is 7:45 a.m., and your Big Rocks are to eat a healthy breakfast and get in 15 minutes of exercise, your routine could look like this:

  • 6:30 a.m. — Get up and get on workout clothes
  • 6:40 a.m. — 15 minute workout
  • 7:00 a.m. — Make scrambled eggs and cut up fruit for breakfast
  • 7:10 a.m. — Eat breakfast
  • 7:20 a.m. — Shower/dress
  • 7:40 am. — Ready to go

If you’ll notice, I padded the routine with a little extra time. You probably don’t need 10 minutes to get your workout clothes on. But maybe you move slow in the morning, so this will give you a little extra time to slowly wake up and get on your workout clothes.

I also added in 5 extra minutes between when the workout ends and when you’d start making breakfast, just to give a little extra buffer. And then it probably won’t take you 20 minutes to make and eat breakfast, but this gives you a little extra time so you can check email or catch the news or listen to a podcast or read a little. I’m all about giving a little margin and breathing room!

My Morning Routine

Example #2: Let’s say you’re a working mom with two kids who are 5 and 8 and your start time is 6:00 a.m., your out-the-door time is 7:30 a.m., and your Big Rocks are to get 15 minutes of quiet time and to read to your kids at breakfast. Your routine could look something like this:

  • 6:00 a.m. — Get up, wash face, make coffee
  • 6:10 a.m. — 15 minutes of quiet time
  • 6:30 a.m. — Get kids up & started on their morning routine, shower/dress
  • 6:50 a.m. — Help the 5-year-old finish getting dressed/ready
  • 7:00 a.m. — Breakfast
  • 7:10 a.m. — Read to kids while they are finishing breakfast
  • 7:20 a.m. — Ready to head out the door.

If the thought of having specific times for each part of your routine freaks you out or you’re in a season of life where you’re just trying to survive and when you get up is constantly changing based upon how many times your baby or toddler wakes up at night, you might consider creating a routine that isn’t time-based… but is just a list of items you plan to do in the same order when you get up every morning. As always, do what works for you and your family!

Do you see how this works? It’s really quite simple. Even if you’ve never had a routine before, you can do this!

The trick is to not bite off more than you can chew. If you only have an hour and a half or two hours and you choose 3 30-minute Big Rocks to tackle, you’re likely going to have an issue. But if you choose two Big Rocks that take 10 to 15 minutes each, you can fit them in and still have time to get ready and out the door in time!

Note: Not a morning person? Here’s a post on How a Non-Morning Person Can Have an Effective Routine.

Step 2: Set Up Accountability

If you want to be successful at anything, you can’t go it alone. You need other people on the journey with you! That’s one reason why I love blogging about things I’m working through/challenging myself with — because I get the benefit of having the public accountability that you all provide for me! 🙂

{Yes, did you know you are my accountability partner? Yup. You may not have known it, but you totally are! 🙂 Thank you!}

Yesterday, I encouraged you to not only leave a comment on the post to say you were participating in this challenge, but I also asked you to tell someone offline.

Why did I ask you to do this? Because I knew that the very act of saying, “I’m doing this” and then telling someone else that you are would encourage you to not just think this is a good idea, but to actually be motivated to follow through with it.

Hello Mornings!

What kind of accountability would motivate you to actually follow through with your morning routine? I recommend that you choose at least two forms of accountability and that one is a person and one is a product.

Accountability Partners — It’s great to have online accountability, but real-life people are the best forms of accountability. They can even show up at your front door if you don’t answer the texts, emails, or phone calls. 😉

Not sure where to find an accountability partner? Check out this post for some ideas. The Hello Mornings site is a great way to plug into morning accountability groups if you can’t find anyone in your area.

Accountability Products — I also am a big fan of accountability products such as apps, printables, or other kinds of trackers. These are great for everyone, but are especially valuable for those of us who love to check things off a list!

At the bottom of today’s post and yesterday’s post, I’ve put together a list of resources that might be great starting points. You can also check out this post for some great ideas on other accountability sources.

Step 3: Stick With It

You’ve got your routine set up. You have your accountability in place. Now you just need to follow through and do it!

A plan only works if you actually follow it. So jump in with both feet and stick with this. You can do this! I’m cheering for you!

Need some encouragement to get your mornings in better shape?

Need some accountability and step-by-step help for transforming your mornings? I’d love to help you!

Day 2 Project

1. Create your routine based upon your start time, out-the-door time, and Big Rocks. Leave a comment letting us know what your routine is. We’d love to hear and be inspired!

2. Put at least two forms of accountability in place. I’d recommend that one is a person and one is a product (a printable, an app, etc.). You decide what would work best for you. Leave a comment and let us know that you put the accountability in place, as well.

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