Okay, so I’m way behind on getting the Simply Tuesday posts up. I was in Indianapolis the past two days so I could speak at MomCon yesterday.
Since all my health stuff in the last few weeks, I had to focus all of my energy the past few days just on speaking and interacting with attendees. I had hoped to have a little extra in the tank to write a few blog posts, but I just didn’t. I had a few things pre-scheduled and my wonderful assistant helped post some other things, but other than speaking and engaging with attendees, I pretty much spent the rest of the time sleeping or resting!
photo from Once a Month Meals
{It feels so weird to not be able to go full-steam like I usually can. I usually juggle a lot and have a lot of irons in the fire, but right now, I am having to majorly pace myself in order to not overdo it.
While it’s been hard for me, it’s been so good for me. I’m learning to really slow down, to focus on the most important priorities, and to let a lot of other things go. I’m learning to listen to my body, to give myself enormous amounts of grace, and to relish and savor rest.}
I did get to see Emily Freeman in person at MomCon and do a quick video with her about her book. Watch it here.
Three of my favorite quotes from the last two sections of the book were:
#1: “I think I recognize in myself a hesitancy to admit my struggle for fear it will incriminate me, branding me as a woman who has a beautiful life but doesn’t appreciate it.”
This section of the book really resonated with me as honestly, it was hard for me to blog about my health struggles the last few weeks as they felt so small an inconsequential compared to other people’s much, much bigger trials.
I didn’t want to be branded as a woman who has a beautiful life and is totally not recognizing it. At the same time, though, I had to remind myself that many other people are probably in a similar situation.
By me sharing how I’m walking this out, I realized I might be able to encourage others who feel like they are struggling from something that also seems “inconsequential” in the grand scheme of things, but that is really bogging them down and discouraging them. I felt like maybe my honest sharing would help someone else feel like they weren’t alone.
#2: “…I remind myself that relief will neither be found in continuing to chase an ideal of my productive self nor in shaming myself for my inability to get everything done.”
Neither chasing after perfectionism nor speaking shaming messages to myself is going to be a healthy way to live.
#3: “Small things don’t always turn into big things. But all things begin small, especially in the Kingdom of God. Acorns become oak trees. Embryos become President. Life starts with a breath. Love starts with hello.”
I thought this was the perfect paragraph to end this series with as it was a beautiful reminder to me that those little “small” things are often the start of something that can end up being very life-transforming. So it’s important not to overlook them, not to view “small” as negative, and not to spend life missing the beauty in small while chasing after what we think is big and great.
Small is almost always where it starts.
I know that I’m giving you almost zero notice on this (unless you watch my Periscope show — then you already know this because I shared it a few days ago!), but I’m planning to start blogging through Nourished: A Search for Health, Happiness, and a Full Night’s Sleep on Monday.
The book is split into 5 sections, so I’m planning to share about one section each week day. That’s the plan at least… life might happen and I may need to roll with the punches. We’ll see!
Karen says
Authenticity in our struggles is important so we don’t feel forced to overdo. I totally understand having had a mini stroke last April. I realized upon returning to work (straight from hospital to drop son at school then into work to be put back directly on physical labor as hospital have me no restrictions) that I desperately needed to be honest with myself and make some changes~ and Quick!!
If we don’t take care of ourselves we are sending a horrible message to the world as to our worth.
Crystal Paine says
“If we don’t take care of ourselves we are sending a horrible message to the world as to our worth.”
Wow! That’s a good word!
Anne says
Crystal, I want to encourage you again. Your health scare and surgery was a BIG deal. Yes, it wasn’t cancer; yes, it could have been much worse. But that was still a significant surgery and you are doing the right thing slowing down, especially given your South Africa trip. You’re modeling for thousands of women (and for your children) who admire you that we must take care of ourselves. Blessings! (and come to Portland, OR or the Seattle area soon to speak please 🙂 )
Crystal Paine says
Thank you so much for your sweet words of encouragement! You bless me so much!
Aimee Wiley says
It sounds like Nourished is the perfect selection for this season of your life:) Take your time; we’re ready to read when you’re ready (and able) to write. I have loved your transparency these past months; it has helped me to be more honest in my own writing, knowing that we grow in grace with each other. Thank you!
Crystal Paine says
Yes, I chose it specifically because I thought it was JUST the reminder I needed!
Jen E says
I was sitting in the front row of that picture from MOMcon!! We were so lucky that you made it! I also got a chance to see Emily speak and it was also amazing! Looking forward to reading Simply Tuesday (now that I better understand what that means!) Blessings to you as you continue to heal and I’ll send an e-mail soon with our picture from MOMcon!!
Crystal Paine says
Thanks SO much for coming to my workshop!!
Amy Deffenbacher says
I’ve loved your refreshing perspectives on life and faith and mothering for a long time! Your willingness to put stuff out there inspired me to do the same. Right there with you on balancing the expectations I place on myself with the limitations that have come my way. Taking the things of every day and using them to point back to Jesus has been the key and each day I have a choice to keep perspective. Thanks for being real.
Crystal Paine says
Thank you so much for your sweet words! You bless me!
Lisa says
I think you had a perfect right to post about your cancer scare, operation, etc. One thing that I’ve learned over and over the past few years is that suffering is not a contest. I’ve been going through something very difficult, but I would hear about someone suffering something worse and immediately think “I don’t have any right to be sad compared to this person.” But life is not a contest where only those who are going through horrible things get to admit that they are suffering. It’s not okay to wallow in self-pity or constantly complain, but it is okay to admit that you’re hurting, or scared, etc.
Your suffering hurts because it’s happening to you, no matter how small it might be. And the correct response is to offer comfort. I think there is a lot of bitterness behind the ‘well, I’ve got it worse so you should be grateful for your blessings’ game. (And I say this as one who has played it myself. :/)
Sarah@TheOrthodoxMama says
“Suffering is not a contest.” Yes. Thanks for sharing.
Sarah@TheOrthodoxMama says
Sorry, I accidentally hit enter. You have a wonderful perspective. I think that many of us do get caught up in comparing our suffering with others, but that doesn’t help anyone out. Compassion for all suffering is what we are called to have.
Crystal Paine says
Wow! Such good words here! Thanks so much for sharing, Lisa!
Karen says
Help yourself first, by taking all the rest you need. Not good to anyone if you are not good to yourself. You and your health are most important right now.
Crystal Paine says
So true! Thanks so much for the encouragement!