Not too long ago, I was talking with a mom and I was saying something about the books I was reading. She immediately shot back, “Oh, I love to read but I don’t have time to read because of my kids.”
My heart wanted to break right in two. Having kids is a lot of work. Trust me, I get that.
And it takes a lot of time and effort and work and sacrifice. Motherhood is no walk in the park.
Having your first child flips your world upside down and means that your schedule is no longer your own. You have a whole new set of responsibilities and to-do’s. Not only that, but you have a person who is now depending upon you and your spouse for their sole survival.
It’s a BIG thing. It’s nothing to shirk at. And it can suck the life right out of you — if you let it.
Which is why I’m about to say something that just might step on some toes…
Are you ready? Buckle your seat belts and hold onto your hats, because in the last few years, I’ve become pretty passionate about what I’m about to say:
Motherhood is a lot of work and responsibility, but it is NOT an excuse to stop using your brain and intellect, to stop enjoying life, and to stop taking time for things you love.
There, I said it.
It’s high time we quit using motherhood as a reason to no longer live life to the fullest, no longer feed our soul and intellect, to no longer enjoy hobbies and relationships like we once did.
Because here’s the truth: one of the BEST things you can do for yourself, your marriage, and your kids is to take time to refuel and refresh yourself. To stop and savor life. To make time for things you love.
Think about it. If you’re just constantly giving and giving and giving out to others, if you’re just pouring and pouring and pouring into your family, if you’re just wringing yourself dry to meet the needs of others and you’re never taking time to replenish, refresh, and refuel, no wonder you feel exhausted and spent!
No wonder you have nothing left to give. No wonder you’re so tired. No wonder you feel brain-fried.
No wonder you feel like you might just snap right in two if one more person asks you to do something or if one more child hollers “MOOOOOMMMMYYYYY!”
As women, we are capable of a lot. We can multi-task. We have “eyes in the back of our head”. We can pull all-nighters when our child is really sick. We can juggle a lot of balls.
But at some point, when a rubber band is stretched out too far for too long, it’s going to snap. At some point, when you keep running on empty, you are truly going to run out of gas and be stranded on the side of the road. At some point, the lack of sleep and running around like a chicken with your head cut off will catch up with you and knock you flat.
And that’s why I cannot say it strongly enough: Moms, give yourself permission to take time for YOU.
To do things you love.
To have coffee with that friend.
To work on that hobby.
To read that book.
To update your scrapbooks.
To work in the garden.
To piddle around in the kitchen.
To engage in stimulating discussions.
To study new things.
To try new things.
What fills you up? What refreshes you? What makes you come alive? What gets you really excited about life?
Set aside some things you think you “have” to do or “must” do or feel obligated to do to carve out some space to invest time into some of those things you truly love.
Investing in yourself is not selfish. Instead, it gives you more energy to be able to pour more into your relationships, your marriage, your job, and your kids.
P.S. If you wish you could find time to do things you love but you just don’t think you have any extra time at all in your schedule right now, I encourage you to check out Jessica Turner’s book, The Fringe Hours.
I got to read a pre-release copy of the book a few months ago and highly recommend it. It’s a must-read for all busy moms!
Want some practical help with setting up your day for success? It all starts the night before! Be sure to grab a copy of my brand-new online course, Make Over Your Evenings.
This 14-day online course includes videos, a workbook, and step-by-step projects and is designed to help you maximize your evenings in order to experience more success in your life, more order in your home, and more joy in your soul.
It’s time to stop sleep-walking through life and wake up to the amazing excitement and fulfillment that comes when you follow my simple plan to Make Over Your Evenings.