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“In the absence of data, we make up stories.”

Rising Strong

So I’m a little behind in posting about our Book Club Book this week, but folks, this book is messing with me in so many good ways. I decided to extend this book club book through the next week since I don’t want to rush through this book.

And oh my goodness! I have underlined and dog-eared more pages than I probably ever have in any other book. And then I keep taking screenshots and texting them to people or reading the quotes aloud to my husband.

Yes, this book is good stuff. So good, in fact, that I just bought it for two people this week!

I read chapters 3-6 the past few days and it’s hard for me to pick just a few quotes to share. But I’ll try:

Rising Strong

“Compassionate people ask for what they need. They say no when they need to, and when they say yes they mean it. They’re compassionate because their boundaries keep them out of resentment.”

Whoa. This was hard-hitting. And a good inspiration to set and keep boundaries.

“In the absence of data, we always make up stories.”

How much of the time do we jump to conclusions and start concocting stories about a situation — when we haven’t taken the time to fact-check and make sure that are assumptions are actually true?

This book has really challenged me in this regard. I realized how many times, I’ve not done my due diligence to check data and make sure I’ve gotten my facts and stories straight. I can let my brain run wild with stories that aren’t true — just based upon a small little thing.

For instance, if I’m in a situation with a friend and she acts kind of cold toward me, I have sometimes made up a big story — that I’ve offended her, that she doesn’t like me, that she doesn’t want to be my friend anymore… when it could just be that she has something hard going on and she’s struggling with it. Or maybe she has been hurt by me about something. But I’ll never know unless I ask instead of just make up stories.

Rising Strong

And finally, the above quote was really, really good. Powerful stuff.

We’ll slowly work our way through chapters 7-11 over the next week. I’ll be scoping about them and blogging about them a few times next week.

Are you reading this book right now? If so, I’d love to hear what’s impacting and challenging you.

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  • I loved this book! It’s one I really need to just soak in for a while (in other words, reread!)! 🙂

    Along similar lines what you shared above about boundaries, I loved this: “How can we expect people to put value on our work when we don’t value ourselves enough to set and hold uncomfortable boundaries?”

  • Leah says:

    My goodness… I think someone is telling me to read this book (actually several someones!). A friend has mentioned this book at least three times to me, and now you are bringing it up, Crystal. I have also watched Brene Brown’s TED talk and found it really hit home. Guess it’s time for me to take the hint and order it…

  • Leigh says:

    I have questions about this book: is the author a Christian? Is it written from a Godly perspective or a self-help perspective? The material you are posting sounds amazing! What are your thoughts?

    • She is a Christian, but the book is written to a broad audience, not necessarily to a Christian audience.

      • Leigh says:

        Thank you! That’s all I needed to know 🙂 Kind of like the book of Esther – even if it doesn’t mention God directly – as long as it is written by someone who belongs to Him I know it will be woven with His truths! I will definitely be buying this book!

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