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Good Reads: Choosing to SEE by Mary Beth Chapman

I stayed up way too late the other night because I had started Choosing to SEE: A Journey of Struggle and Hope and couldn’t put it down. The book chronicles the story of Steven Curtis and Mary Beth Chapman and their five-year-old adopted daughter’s tragic accident in 2008.

The story will make you laugh and cry — and will ultimately touch you at a very deep level. I especially appreciated Mary Beth’s raw honesty. She didn’t try to come across like she has it all figured out or has it altogether. Instead, she shares openly about her many struggles throughout her life.

After finishing this book, I was not only motivated to make sure I am cherishing each moment with my children, but I was also inspired to do more for orphans. I was especially excited to learn about the work of the Chapman’s ministry, Show Hope, an organization dedicated to providing support and help for orphans, in addition to giving financial assistance and grants to families who are raising money to adopt needy children.

After reading the book and researching more about Show Hope, my heart was very moved to support them. My husband and I discussed and prayed about it and felt that the Lord would have us be a part of this ministry. So I am thrilled beyond words to to tell you that, in addition to supporting Compassion International, beginning this month, will also be supporting Show Hope and helping to provide financial grants for families seeking to adopt.

I’m humbled to be a part of this and thank you from the bottom of my heart for the difference you are making in the lives of children around the world by reading here.

Discovered any Good Reads recently? Tell me about them in the comments and I’ll consider adding them to my long and ever-growing book list!

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  • Sandra says:

    I loved reading her book. It was hard to put down. A death of a child is the hardest thing the anyone can go through. She is very honest with her feelings in the book and on her blog. Sadly there are too many parents that have had to say goodbye to a child, including myself.

  • Bless you! The Chapman’s story is indeed touching and their heart for orphans and adopted children is a reflection of God’s heart. It’s a beautiful thing! And as one who has a desire to adopt but no financial way to do so… I can very much appreciate their ministry. God will bless those – like yourself, like Steven and Mary Beth – who put His will into action on earth. Wonderful to see and be a part of!

    • Angie says:

      We also don’t have the means to adopt (I’m a SAHM and my husband is a teacher) but we are completing our 3rd international adoption. God can raise that money for you, Shannon. When he called us to this 3rd adoption, he raised over $10,000 in 16 weeks! It was amazing. He loves adoption! If adoption is truly the desire of your heart, He put it there. He loves to see us care for orphans. Maybe He’ll raise the money for you ! (I don’t claim to know his will for your family but I do know that He loves adoption and often asks us to step out in faith!)

      • Amy says:

        I’ve heard things like this happen over and over again so I just wanted to also encourage people to step out in faith. God loves adoption! There are grants and interest free loans available to adoptive families too. I’ve purchased lots of stuff from families fundraising for their adoptions. Things like jewelry, clothing, raffles, etc. We have two children adopted from China and I can say that adoption has changed our lives! The Lord is so good! If He puts adoption on your heart then He will provide. I’ve heard of families raising thousands of dollars from rummage sales. I’ve heard of families who sold things they had around the house, even an extra vehicle to raise the funds needed. It might not always be easy and comfortable, but it is so worth it!

  • Jodie Clements says:

    As a mom of two beatiful internationally adopted children it is heart warming to see you support such a great organization. Thanks

  • I saw him in concert at a Women of Joy conference this spring and his humble and gentle spirit really touched me too.
    I will have to keep my eyes open for this book now!

    They sell jewelry and shirts in support of Show Hope too – I hadn’t realized that until I saw them at the conference. They are nice pieces and support a great cause!

  • Jocelyn says:

    Thank you for supporting such a wonderful organization. Our family has adopted twice internationally and the need for support of adopting families is great. God’s heart is for the orphan, no doubt about it!

  • kate says:

    Thank you so much for using your position as a very popular blogger to spread awareness for Compassion and Show Hope! We adopted our son from Russia 3 years ago and we hear SO many people say ‘Oh I would love to adopt, but we can’t afford it!’ – we are not wealthy – we fundraised and couponed and went without to afford our travel and adoption expenses – many times it is just about choices – but often people truly do need a grant or some kind of help, thank you so much for contributing to Show Hope and for leading others to it! It is an amazing organization that helps children like my son become part of a family (something we all deserve but so many simply don’t get) Thanks again for being awesome =) Kate

  • Betsy Durand says:

    Yes, I have a WONDERFUL book I just finished that I think you would enjoy immensely. It is called “Gospel-Powered Parenting” by William Farley. Excellent and so helpful. Let me know what you think.

  • Thank you for posting this Crystal and letting us all know about your new support! What a blessing!!

    Also, we were very excited and thrilled about hearing this as we hope to adopt one day ourselves. We went to Romania on a 2-week mission trip many years ago and were so deeply touched by the precious children there and made us realize even more what a blessing and wonderful responsibility it is to adopt and to care/provide for the orphans by whatever means are available – as everyone’s level of support (monetary, prayer or otherwise) is a Biblical response as Christians and a blessing to all.

    Thanks for this wonderful news!

  • Melissa Weiss says:

    wonderful story and I know God is blessed by your good works! Love it!! Love your site and that your a christian posting christian things instead of freebies all the time!

  • kate says:

    Thanks for shining the light on Show Hope and their wonderful ministry. As a mom of an adopted son, it is something near and dear to me. Thanks for helping to spread the word and helping to bring kids to their forever families!

  • Carrie says:

    I purchased this book last weekend to read on our road trip this Friday! We love everything about the Chapman Family and have seen Steven Curtis Chapman in concert several times along with his wonderful sons! God bless you for your involvement with Show Hope!

  • amy says:

    OH you have made me cry. As a mom of a China adopted daughter I love to hear people giving to Show Hope. It will help one more orphan come home. God bless you..
    I was suprised at how I giggled at parts o the book. Im a first time posted but I sit here with tears..
    Thank you!

  • Julie says:

    Our family received an adoption grant from Show Hope in 2007. If God has laid it on your heart to adopt, do not let the finances hinder you. We were a family of 3 living on about $26,000. per year and my husband was in seminary. I shared with our wonderful friends that we wanted to adopt and they gaves us $15,000, my husband got a raise, our parents gave us $1,000. each, I cashed in a life insurance policy and my husband’s part time job turned into full-time. The Lord provided for us and we did not have to borrow for any of the fees. Our adopted son is from Vietnam and I can’t imagine our family without him.

  • Annie says:

    Thank you for your comments. My husband and I are foster/adoptive parents. Not only are their children all of the world who need us, there are children in our “back yard”. If you are considering adoption, please consider adoption through foster care. It is a remarable experience. We really cannot describe how much these little ones teach us about love, life, and God. My adopted son is five, he’s been with us since he was two and really has no memories of before. He was praying with his Dad the other night, and his prayer went something like this…”God, thank you for giving us everything we need, when we need it, so we can take care of Your children. Amen”. My husband was speechless, and that’s when I told him that sometimes children teach us to pray.

    • Marisa Stone O'Brien says:

      Thank you so much for meantioning the kids in the US that need to be adobted. So many want just babies, however, there are lots and lots of delightful kids out the need a home to be adopted into.

      God Bless MSM for bringing this topic up.

  • saree says:

    i have been wanting to read this! we lost a child in infancy. SCC’s last album really spoke to me. i know the book would as well. thanks for putting the bug in my ear to check it out.
    i am SO excited that you’re supporting show HOPE now. supporting adoption is supporting a beautiful picture of the way God has adopted us, his children!

  • Lexie says:

    Thank you for supporting them! Oh, how much we need to support the orphans! We are praying to gain some assistance from them for our upcoming adoption – so I am grateful in more ways than one!

  • Laura says:

    Thanks for the book review, I have been wanting to read this book. I saw on Beth Moore’s blog last week where she recommended it. I need to go to the bookstore and get it!

  • Jenny says:

    Thank you for supporting the Show Hope ministry. It is a fantastic organization that has helped so many families. It helped our family to bring our son Levi home last August as we adopted internationally last year. I need to read her book, I haven’t had the opportunity to do so yet.

  • Andrea says:

    I can’t wait to read this book. We are hoping to travel next month to bring our 13 year old daughter home from China. She will be our 6th child, our 3rd adoption. We received a grant from Show Hope in 2005 for our daughter’s adoption, and are waiting to hear from them for this adoption. They are an amazing ministry. Don’t let finances stop you from adopting. God will provide…we are living proof of that. We would have missed out on so much had we become overcome with fear about finances and not brought our daughters home! They are incredible blessings!!

  • Rachel W says:

    Thank you for posting this and for your support to families in the adoption process. As the mother to a Russian born son, helping orphans has a very special meaning to us. We’re thankful for the care our son received prior to his adoption. He’s the best thing that my husband and I ever did!

  • I am so excited about MSM and Show Hope! We definately do not have the money to adopt…in fact, we don’t even make enough to qualify to adopt via most homestudy standards….yet the Lord is paving the way and providing every penny for us to complete our domestic adoption. Hoping the phone rings and we get “the call” any day now!

  • Bethany says:

    Thank you for sharing this! My family was blessed to receive a grant from the Chapman’s foundation for the adoption of our daughter. Thank you for your contributions to this organization! It helps so many!

  • Amber Cullum says:

    Thank you for sharing this as I did not know she had written a book.
    A book that will arouse every emotion you can imagine is The Road of Lost Innocence by Somaly Mam. I highly recommend it.

  • Alicia says:

    I read this book in 1 day, so captured by the story. I knew it would be sad, but I laughed and cried both, just like you did. I have been a fan of Steven Curtis Chapman’s since I was a teenager. His music has spoken to me greatly throughout the years. Not to mention his life, his faith, his family and his love and care for orphans. Basically, being a fan of his means I’m a fan of his family as well. When I heard that Mary Beth was writing this book, I knew I had to read it. I love how vulnerable and honest she was and how she just laid her struggles out there for all to see. I have not shared in the same loss as she has suffered, but have wrestled and struggled in much the same way. As for adoption, we have not figured out if adoption is part of God’s plan for us, but are prayerfully considering it. Thanks for posting about this book – it is a great read.

  • Catherine says:

    Thank you so much for supporting Show Hope! My family is in the process of adopting a baby boy from Rwanda and should be hearing this month about a possible grant through Show Hope. They have been very clear in conveying that the money they have available for grants is very little right now, so your assistance will be so helpful for adoptive families!

  • I just finished reading the book Already Gone by Ken Ham (founder of the creation musuem in Cincinnati). This book opened my eyes to the state of churches in this country. Most people think that kids are leaving the church once they go away to college but Ken Ham’s research has shown that children are “already gone” as early as elementary school! This is a must read for every Christian parent.

    • Crystal says:

      I’ve heard rave reviews of this so I bought it at the homeschool conference we attended not too long ago since I found it on clearance for only $5. Can’t wait to dive into it!

  • Erin says:

    I was thrilled to see you promoting and supporting Show Hope! We are in the middle of an international adoption ourselves and our hearts are greatly burdened for orphans worldwide and it’s wonderful to know you’ll be helping bring many home to their forever families! Yet another reason to love MSM!

  • Margaret says:

    I have put this book on hold at the library. I have a heart for this ministry since we struggled with infertility for many years.
    Just finished reading Better Off (recommended by you) I found that fascinating for many reasons.
    Am reading another non-fiction adventure story now. Will see how that goes.

  • Breanne says:

    Mitch Albom is one of my absolute favorite authors. The books I love of his are “For one more day” and “Tuesdays with Morrie”, and his more recent “Have a little faith”. Wonderful, easy reads. And even better, true stories. enjoy. I’ll be sure to locate this book. Thank you for sharing

  • Amy says:

    How wonderful to see one of my favorite blogs, MSM, teaming up with such a fabulous organization. We are in the process of adopting a second child from China through the special needs program. This will be our third adoption. We are a one income family and God keeps providing everything we need financially for our adoptions. I am committed to living frugally and finding deals so that more of our money can go to help the orphan or bring home more children. Your website is a big help!

  • Mandy says:

    I looked at the pictures in this book when I was at the bookstore last week and had to put it down because I started crying! I couldn’t imagine going through that. I can’t wait to read the book!

  • Lori says:

    “The Hole in Our Gospel” by Richard Stearns, president of World Vision-still reading but is very inspirational!

  • jan says:

    Thank you for supporting Show Hope. We adopted our daughter from South Korea in 2007. We hope to adopt again if my husband can get another full-time job.

  • Michelle says:

    I just picked up this book today and can’t wait to start reading it. Show Hope is such a great organization. I’m so excited to be able to be apart of showing hope to orphans.

  • Kris says:

    I picked up the book to read at Barnes & Nobles on date night last Saturday night and ended up buying it and staying up until 2a.m. to finish it. It was great!



  • Suzanne says:

    Another adoptive mom here who is very thrilled to see you add this to your supported charities.

    Think of the impact of just one family who adopts a child. It’s huge. It not only touches the family and the child, but those around them who may also be led to adopt or even to teach tolerance and God’s Love for us all. So imagine the impact that multiple adoptions have. And so on.

    I know that our adoption experience has forever changed my life, my husband’s life, and our daughter’s life. We are so blessed. My cup runneth over!

  • Mama Koala says:

    So excited to hear about this–I’ve been inspired by their story, and need to pick up the book.

    I just finished The Hole in the Gospel–incredible book–it shakes you up in a good way!

  • Luba says:

    We are adopting too!! After seeing an example of a family at our church adopting 3 kids with Down Syndrome from Eastern Europe with the help of Reece’s Rainbow. Our future daughter is also special needs, but not DS. All orphans’ biggest special need is a family. God is so good in having adopted us through faith in Jesus. It’s hard to see the needs of orphans in this rich country of easy and comfortable Christianity. But when we do – our hearts and lives are not the same again. On behalf of all adopting families, thank you Crystal for help – in helping us save money through good deals we find on your site (that’s a fundraiser in itself!), and for bringing awareness to people of the needs of orphans and adoptive families. May God continue to bless you richly.

  • Sheila Smith says:

    3 awesome inspiring reads:

    Crazy Love by Francis Chan
    Forgotten God by Francis Chan
    Radical by David Platt

    Life changing books!

  • Another amazing book: The Hole in our Gospel!

    Written by the CEO of World Vision…wonderful!

  • Amanda says:

    Thank you, so much!

  • Jennifer S says:

    Show Hope gave us a grant when we adopted back in 2006. It was a huge blessing because adoption is so expensive. We have since adopted another child this year. They are a wonderful organization!

  • Mari Larkin says:

    Yes indeed, this book is awesome. I am currently in the middle of it, and it is so very real and touching. A great testimony of God’s handiwork and adoption and life!

  • Kellie says:

    Thank you for supporting Show Hope! All 3 of my children were born of my heart, and while we didn’t receive any grants, we are still amazed at how God provided us with all the money we needed for the adoption fees. I pray many more parents will open their hearts to build their families through adoption, and that Show Hope and other ministries are able to grow and help those families who choose that path! Also, it is so fun to see how many adoptive families read your blog 🙂

  • Erica says:

    God placed adoption on our hearts last March and on April 15th we received a call to “rescue” a child and brought him into our home the next day. He’s been apart of our family ever since and our adoption will be complete this year!

  • Peggy says:

    I am reading a great book – Choosing Gratitude by Nancy Leigh DeMoss – I cannot recommend it enough. It is challenging me wonderfully in the grace of thankfulness.

  • jen says:

    My husband and I brought our daughter home from China in March 2009 with the help of Show Hope. The money they raise really does go directly to helping bring children home. From the very bottom of my heart – thank you MSM for helping to bring more children home to their forever families!

  • Cher says:

    Crystal, thank you so much for living your faith so vibrantly and reaching out to others! It is so wonderful to be a reader here because I know that I am part of something special and wonderful. God bless your beautiful family and your generosity!

  • Brittan says:

    My mom was JUST standing in my living room 2 days ago, holding my 6 week old adopted sister, and crying while telling me about this book! Thank you for posting this and supporting Show Hope! The cost of my parents adoption was fundraised for probably 80% of it! Do NOT let finances stop you (anyone) from adopting! It is the James 1:27 mandate that we ALL take care of the orphans of this world, whether that be taking one into your home, giving financially to help someone else bring a child in, or partnering in prayer for orphans.
    Can’t wait to get a copy of this book! 🙂

  • Karen says:

    Thank you for the review! I may have to add this to my list. I saw other people here recommend “The Hole in Our Gospel” and I just wanted to 2nd that. It’s become my favorite book of the recent couple years. I also just started “Outlive Your Life” by Max Lucado and love it. So both are highly recommended reads.

  • Suzanne says:

    I live in Nashville and am friends with many families who are in the circles with the Chapmans. They are an AMAZING couple! They love the Lord, and the way they live their lives beautifully evidences that! Many of my friends have adopted internationally and have received grants from Show Hope! It’s a WONDERFUL organization, and I’m so excited that you are supporting its work here through MSM! So thankful for the way that you use MSM for God’s glory around the world…and especially in this new way–caring for orphans around the world!

  • Dawn says:

    Bless you for bringing attention to Show Hope! Our daughter is adopted from China and we were blessed by financial assistance from the wonderful organization. The Chapmans have inspired so many people to dream the impossible dream of adoption and many wonderful people, through generous donations, have helped to make the dream a reality.

  • miranda says:

    I am halfway through this one too! I really had to put it down though because my pregnancy emotions just couldn’t handle it after the chapter about May 21. I think my eyes were practically swollen into slits from crying so hard. It really is an awesome book that is touching me so much already. Cant wait to get through the rest of it.

  • Amanda says:

    Thanks for the recommendation. I have added it to my wish list at B&N when I cash in my swag bucks 🙂

  • Jay says:

    How neat- I just added this book on my to read list. I enjoy reading inspirational true stories. Left to Tell by Immacule Ilibigiza is an amazing story about her surviving the Rwanda holocaust of 1994! I had the privilige to be able to hear her speak after Iread her book. She taught me a lot on forgiveness, trust in the Lord, hope, faith, and love.

  • Paige says:

    Also recommended: Adopted for Life by Russel Moore
    Excellent book encouraging the church in adoption. His book is excellent and it parallels our adoption in Christ. He also focuses on the idea that adopted children are no different – avoiding the use of “real”, “natural”, “adopted” etc. just as you don’t say “this is my c-section child”.

  • A Mom says:

    Thanks for supporting adoptions! we are on our way to adoption #2, child #3 in our family. I have read the book “Adopted for Life” mentioned by Paige, and some of it i really liked and other parts i really did not enjoy. In my opinion, the book diminished the adoptive childrens’ home country and i remember reading something like “why should we teach about russia when we should focus on teaching our children the adoptive parents’ family history?” . Maybe because of adopting thru Russia the adoption was not obvious but for those families who do transracially adopt, believe me when i say teaching them their country of birth’s history and culture is important for when they interact with others of the same ethnicity as themselves. Lack of knowledge can create social barriers for them later when they interact with others of the same ethnicity.

  • Laurie says:

    Wow the adoption community is so awesome. I am a single mom by choice to my 2 daughters who are now 2&6. First DD came home at 10mos in 2004 and 2nd DD came home Nov 2008 at 12mos. I was so abundantly blessed to pay cash for both of my adoptions on a nusring salary less than $40,000. My girls are all my dreams come true a million times over. Many night I weep at the awesome God we servce. There are so many children that need homes. If everyone in the US just adopted 1 that would be 1 less child without a forever family. And like many have said the money seems to be there when you need it. Thanks to Dave Ramsey too for making me see that anything is possible esp adopting my girls by saving and living frugally. We are debt free except our home. Thanks MSM for your compassion everyday. I would love to share more of my story on how I was able to pay cash for my adoptions without any grants,fundraising or help from family.

  • That looks like a book i will have to check out. His music has touched me, in how he dealt with this tragedy.
    A really good book I read recently was called “The Devil in Pew # Seven” by Rebecca Alonzo. I was sent this book to review and if you want to read an amazing story of forgiveness and overcoming, this book had me challenged. This is my review….of course I am not as a accomplished as a blogger as you and have to post on the fly often, so forgive that!

  • Brooke says:

    I am in the process of reading the Chapman’s book. I have recently enjoyed both “I will carry you” by the wife of a singer in the group Selah (Angie Smith) and Jerry Sittser’s “A Grace Disguised”. Mrs. Chapman actually quotes Sittser in on of her last chapters in the beginning. Both very good reads.

  • Brittany says:

    I love that you are now supporting the foundation Show Hope! It touches my heart. Since I was young, God has placed the desire and passion for adoption. My husband and I just had our first child and plan on adopting in the future. We also do not have the financial means right now, but I’m not concerned about it. I know that as God gave me this desire and passion he will always give me the funds when we need them, and maybe not even a day early. I know it will happen.

    This is such a great ministry, and I’m so thankful that you are supporting them and help spreading the word! Thank you!

  • Kaeli says:

    Just FYI, Max Lucado’s new book, “Out Live Your Life: You Were Made to Make a Difference” is being posted on the KLOVE Lisa & Eric page:

    Currently the first three chapters are up (will only stay up a week). Great way to read a new book for free. And if you choose to purchase, one hundred percent of the author’s royalties from Outlive Your Life products will benefit children and families through World Vision and other ministries of faith-based compassion, like building water wells in Uganda. So when you buy the book, you are already doing something to outlive your life.

    Gotta love it!

  • Lisa says:

    You have got to read Battle Ready Moms Raising Battle Ready Kids by Reba Bowman. Wow! I have been so encouraged and challenged by reading this book. As a mom I want to do and be the best for my children but I realize that my focus is not always on the right things. I am changing my strategy and I am seeing positive results in my family. Reba gives you such practical insight. Very inspirational and motivational!!

  • Nancy says:

    Adoption is a Gift from God and we thank Him daily for our blessing that we recieved from Him. Our adoption was from the states (here in KS). I am going to have to buy this book, Choosing to See. A book by Karen Kingsbury “A Treasury of Adoption Miracles” is a super read too. Just make sure you have a box of tissues close by!

  • melissa says:

    This book does sound like it will be a good read but I have to say what I am most touched by in reading these posts is that there are so many who have adopted. While this is my favorite blog site, reading these comments makes me realize what a great group of people actually follow this blog. We too have adopted 4 domestically. It seems that a large percentage of the blogs followers have the same heart. Thanks for all you do!!!!

    • Crystal says:

      Melissa: I’m humbled and honored to have a readership made up of many families who have adopted. Some of them have shared their stories and I’ve been so moved!

  • Carrie says:

    I just finished “Lost in the Middle” by Paul Tripp. It’s written about midlife, but it really is the best book I have ever read, other than the Bible (I’m 28 and found it totally applicable, so it’s not just for midlife). It is thoroughly biblical, and written by a counselor who knows how to reach the heart of people.

    I also just finished “The Feminist Mistake” by Mary Kassian, which is an objective look at the history of feminism. It was very interesting and sobering.

  • Jacky says:

    Chrystal, I have been following your blog for a good while now and was so excited to see this post. My husband and I are in the process of adopting from Ehtiopia and the Chapmans are such an encouragment to all adoptive parents! Thank you for helping raise awareness about our responsibility as Christians to help orphans!
    James 1:27 says “Pure and undefiled religion in the sight of our God and Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep oneself unstained by the world.”

  • I just want to thank you for posting “good reads” when you find them. I love to read and there are just too many choices of books out there. It really helps to hear a review from someone you know and trust (even if I only “know” you from reading your blog for so many years). Your opinion is very valuable to me. Thanks for having such a great blog!

  • Katie says:

    Thanks for sharing about this book- I am ordering a copy for our friends who just lost their sweet two year old boy. I hope this may give some comfort to them.

  • Janee says:

    Thanks for your support of this worthy organization. My husband and I are in the process of adopting a little girl with Down syndrome from Eastern Europe so this is a cause that is near and dear to our hearts. We hope to have our new daughter home within the next 1-2 months.

  • Sherri says:

    I look forward to reading this book! I have loved and admired the Chapman’s for many years. When our boys were 8 & 11 God placed it in our hearts to grow our family through adoption. My hubby is a minister and we had no savings! But as many have said before me, if God places it in your hearts to adopt He WILL provide. We DID have several yard sales that did raise several thousand dollars each and received some gifts from friends and family. The Chapman’s had not started Show Hope at that time. We were the last group out of Romania with our precious daughter before they closed to ALL foreign adoptions. We are very thankful for our adoption journey and the gift of our daughter. It has truly placed a desire in our hearts to help others in the years to come. I rejoice with the Chapman’s for helping so many realize the dream of being a Forever Family!

  • Shelley C says:

    Our son and dil are looking to adopt and since their journey began, we have seen testimonies of how God provides. These things have opened my eyes to the needs of others. They are looking to adopt an Ethiopian boy with in the next year if finaces are available. THey have had several fundraisers already and they have a great support system through their church many of whom have adopted. They are facing a job change and a move in the near future, so they are under lots of pressure and strain. If any of you think of them, please pray….(Adam and Tina).

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