It's Saturday and that means it's time to share the great deals we've gotten this past week and other ways we've saved.
I saved money by having a Baking Day to stock up the freezer and by shopping mark-downs at Dillons. (If you missed those posts you can see them here, here, here, here, and here.) Also, I was struck very profoundly this week with another ongoing way I save a lot of money each year–by not going shopping very often!
You see, yesterday I went to replace my one and only pair of black boots. I've worn these same boots almost every day during the Fall/Winter months for the last three years. To say I've gotten the use out of them would be an understatement! (Being the minimalist I am, I only have two pairs of shoes for the cooler months–classic, versatile black boots and tennis shoes.)
My husband and I opted to go to the mall to look for new boots since we figured we'd have more of a selection of stores carrying decent-quality boots. I honestly can't remember the last time I went to the mall to shop and as soon as I'd been in there for a little while I knew exactly why I try to avoid going there.
Why? Because it made me discontent. When I stay out of stores bombarding me with the latest and greatest in things I "must have", my small little wardrobe is plenty enough for me. In fact, I find it very simplifying to only have a few tops and a few bottoms that I can mix and match with a few pieces of jewelry and a few pair of shoes.
But not yesterday. As we walked in and out of stores, I began to feel the "need" to expand my wardrobe, update my styles, and–you guessed it–buy more stuff. Stuff I've lived happily without for years and stuff I don't need.
While I did get the perfect pair of boots at a great price, I left the mall feeling like I'd not purchased enough–like I would have been much more satisfied if I'd have also purchased those cute tops I saw or bought an additional pair of shoes.
And then it hit me: this is so silly! None of that stuff is going to make me any happier or more content. In fact, probably the more money I'd spend in there, the more I'd feel the need to spend.
Compared to many, my wardrobe might be small. I might not have all the latest styles or name brands, but I'm content with it and it serves my needs. And having only a few items of clothing–all of which I like– makes it so easy for me to choose what to wear in the morning. It saves me so much time and effort (and money, too!) to keep it simple.
While I still think I have a long way to go in learning to be truly content, I do think that staying out of the mall as much as is possible is a huge help. And next time I need new boots (which hopefully won't be for another three years!), I think I'll skip the mall and go straight to a shoe store.
Do you find that shopping less or avoiding certain stores or shopping malls helps you be more content with what you already have? I'd love to hear your thoughts!
Those are a few ways we saved money this week. How'd you do this week? Post about the deals and
bargains you were able to snag this week or other ways you saved money
on your blog (with pictures, if possible!) and then come back here and
leave your link below. **To make it easy for everyone to navigate quickly through the links, your link must link directly to your Super Savings Saturday post.**
AMEN, sister. I have a slightly different outlook on this because I like to dress fashionably and having a good wardrobe is important to me, but even considering that, I don’t spend a lot of money, and I STAY OUT OF THE MALL. Things that have worked for me, as I try to dress fashionably and still stay frugal:
1. Spend time with your wardrobe and with your clothes. Try everything on. Record–seriously, write it down–what looks good, what combinations look good. Stick to those combinations–and colors. Variety in a wardrobe is for suckers. (Look at the really well-dressed icons. Are they known for a variety of looks? Heck, no. Jackie O is known for her suits, Audrey Hepburn is known for her little black dresses. You will become an icon yourself if you find what looks good on you and STICK WITH IT.)
2. Visualize. Visualize what you’re missing out of your wardrobe, keep it in mind as you shop, and buy only that.
3. Buy basics in bulk. I have a lot of button down shirts, which look good on me and which I need for work. I also have a lot of fitted tee-shirts, which also look good on me.
4. Buy one coat, one bag, and a few pairs of shoes. I agree with Crystal on this one. Despite all the fuss about shoes, are the great style icons known for their shoe choices? No. No one really cares what shoes you wear, what bag you carry, or what coat you put on.
5. DON’T GO INTO THE MALL! 🙂
Thanks, Crystal, for letting me rant. Hope this helps.
I totally agree about staying out of the mall. It’s getting even harder as we head into the holiday season. Thanks so much for all the great info. you share.
It helps me to not feel that way, because not much fits me from stores that I like. I have a different size than most sores, sort inbetween a girls size 14 and a woman’s 0-2, which almost no one carries. So, if I buy clothes I generally feel bad as I do not buy things very often.
As far as your boots, did you find some? I have been looking for a nice pair….
how long do expect they usually last? I found one, but it was $44 and I was not sure if I could expect them to last long enough to make that worth it.
Thanks for posting at such a timely hour. “We” can be so wasteful…I intentionally do not go shopping. If I do it is a must have…a bra or panties. I work out of the home, used to be full time til my boss cut my hours a few weeks ago. So I wear the same 3 pair of jeans all week long. I was on Weight Watchers and lost 65 pounds and have kept it off for 3 years now. So I have the same 3 pair of jeans I had then. I do fluctuate a bit, but I keep an eye on my weight. I believe now that is key to keeping me in just a few clothes rather than many different sizes. I shop the occasional thrift store when needed. I also have a blue jean skirt, that is too big, and needs to be replaced. I have a black skirt and 1 pair of black slacks. I have several blouses I wear with those items. That is it. ANd that is okay with me.
Now bras, that is a different story…I badly need a new bra. That is something I have had a hard time since losing weight.
I have learned through 16 years of marriage and seeing my mom and dad throughout their marriage to just be content. It is hard sometimes, I won’t lie. But, to me, I’d rather feed us well and enjoy the occasional day with them. DH and I are very simple. He is happy to get a “new” pair of jeans from the thrift store from time to time. It is all about being happy and satisfied with what God has given you, isn’t that what we tell our kids all the time too…:)
I love your webpage! A friend shared the link and now I’m addicted! Thanks a bunch!
I have been reading your blog for a few weeks now, and I really like it. Thanks for always posting realistic tips.
I am a single mother and my budget is tight. God has always provided though!
I have found myself hating shopping too. For the exact same reasons everyone else has posted.
This year I have challenged myself to find what I need at a thrift store or garage sale first before I even think about buying it brand new. I am usually pretty successful.
I have also found if you ask God for something, He usually delivers-pretty quickly if you truly need it.
Two weeks ago, I tried making my own bread for the first time. I LOVE it; the taste doesn’t compare to store bought. And the price! I can bake three loaves for the about half the cost of “good” store bought bread.
Now I wonder why I was so afraid to make it myself before.
(Okay, I used a breadmaker for the hard part, and baked it in the oven. BUT, I received it for a gift years ago, and have bad shoulders, so hand kneading is out.)
I have also found buying fresh produce and shopping the perimeter of the grocery store, we eat well, for a lot less than preservative/filler laden foods that has no nutritional value. I bake our own cookies, cakes etc. (and now breads!) and I always make a list before I go to the store. I try to stick to the list only, unless it is truly a great deal-then I stock up. I usually use coupons, but only on items I know I normally buy.
Recently, I have started making my own Laundry Detergent as well. I use that, along with vinegar for softening and line dry outside when weather permits.
Love the boots you picked out too! For shoes, Other than the one pair of black “dressy” pumps, I usually wear Doc Martens. My feet hurt if I wear anything else.
They are a great investment, because they wear like iron. They are also very comfy, but can be a tad “ugly” or plain in appearance. I don’t care, I figure life is too short to have sore feet.
I usually buy mine on Ebay. I have purchased four pairs at 70-80% off for myself and daughter. They had been worn once or twice. Usually the seller didn’t care for them, or in one case they were brand new!
So don’t overlook Ebay for deals!
I bought $1,200 worth of Michelin tires for my Corvette. Had a coupon worth $60 with the receipt. Check finally arrived.
I had that same feeling for years and finally quit going to the mall. There are a few exceptions to that but over time the feeling has gotten better even when I do go. You expressed it so well..
Sherrie
Hmmm…When I had my first kid almost 3 years ago, I had been overweight beforehand and getting pregnant put my hormones and such back in whack and I lost about 20 pounds post baby. Buying a new wardrobe really helped my confidence and helped me feel less frumpy. Having spit up on a designer top is easier to stomach when you know you don’t look bad! ;oD Seriously, a new wardrobe really does boost my confidence (the same as a new haircut, brushed teeth – this is a feat for me with three kids under 3!, a shower, etc.) but true contentment and happiness comes from within. Nothing can make that happen but YOURSELF. For some it’s faith in God, some a new wardrobe, some botox. I personally find contentment in my faith in God and know that that is the most important thing in life. Vanity of vanities…clothes are only to cover our bodies. We can’t take them with us!
The mall doesn’t tempt me, because everything there is so expensive I would never even consider it. Well, take that back. I’m always tempted by the food court. My real temptation is collecting cheap junk, even sometimes stuff I don’t really like. I had to decide to not go to HomeGoods for the next few years – such a fabulous, inexpensive store with beautiful things! But I don’t need any of it right now! Also, I can’t go garage-saling alone, I have to have an accountability buddy along to ask, “Do you need that?” or else I will come home with so much junk just because it was cheap. The thrift store is dangerous too, but it’s dirty and the lighting is depressing so I can usually talk myself out of things there. I buy almost all of my clothes there. I can’t believe the prices they charge for flimsy pieces of clothing in regular clothing stores!
I came back today to read the other comments. I just contemplated buying those same boots. Are they comfortable?
I do have another wardrobe question for you. What do you keep on hand for dressier events. My husband’s job has a semi-formal event every year. Just curious. Thanks.
I get that way just going to thrift stores! LOL!
I haven’t shopped in a mall for years. Business must be bad. I went a couple of months ago to make a return to Sears. I had foolishly allowed them to sign me up for a credit card because DH needed some jeans right quick, and it gave me $15 off. I ended up returning the jeans and canceling the card. Well, after returning them, I took a hike through the mall and was set upon by a photographer from the portrait place, offering a free 11x if I let them take pictures of the baby. Of course, all the pictures were adorable, and of course, I wanted to buy them all, but with heroic sales resistance (and also because I couldn’t afford it anyway), I left with only the freebie. LOL! It’s awful cute.
After that, I was set upon by one of those cart salesman, who lathered me with Israeli hand lotion and buffed my nails. I practiced sales resistance there, too.
Recently, I had to go to Sears to get some pellets for our water softener. I didn’t take any detours through the mall in that case. 🙂
Do you know of anywhere that has a compiled list of all the places offering something for free on election day? I know about starbucks, crispy kreme, etc.
Thanks for this post. Very insightful, and so true! People are surprised when I tell them I don’t like window shopping, and I never had words to express why, but now I do! This is exactly it! Thanks!
Thank you SO much for this post. It was so right on with what is going on in my life. Although this doesn’t relate DIRECTLY to me with clothes, I found that I get discontent regarding the kids’ “stuff.” I actually have their Christmas gifts already…got them when I saw great deals/clearance items throughout the year. HOWEVER, when I went shopping recently, I was just BOMBARDED with images of toys, toys, toys. I found myself thinking about the cool toys that I just “NEEDED” to get for my four-year old. Needless to say, I didn’t buy any of them…and will try to avoid toy sections from now until AFTER Christmas. How many toys does a kid need ANYWAY?
I have to say that I love to shop and use to love the mall. As I had children I fell out of love with the mall. I went, fo rthe first time in many years, just the other day. I didn’t even like the stuff there. It just seemed so predictable. I love thrift stores. I have way too many clothes but not many people realize that I pay next to nothing for them. Have someone you know that has good taste go to a thrift store with you (go when they are having a sale for more bang for your buck) and it’s the best thing EVER!!!
P.S. – I am having a HUGE contest on my blog for the entire month of November:
http://realworldmartha.wordpress.com/2008/11/01/tis-better-to-give-than-to-receiveright/
I avoid the mall also b/c of the temptation to spend money. And, it also makes me discontent with what I have. I do however think we moms that work so hard for our families to save money and provide for our kids first, do deserve something nice and new and up to date every once in awhile. I have clothes that I have worn for 8 years at least!
There is a point that you can go overboard however, we all have things that we do truly need and shouldn’t feel guilty about getting ourselves.
You are right!! Staying home is cheaper!! Too bad we cannot do ALL our shopping via the internet and phone!!
I have been happy to find however, that some food items we use are available at Amazon.com…for a more reasonable price than we can get them here…you just need to purchase at least $25 worth and the shipping is FREE!! That is one way I save gas, time and money. They seem to continue adding to their selection. They are pretty quick to get it here too, within a week or less usually.
Since you hate the mall, have you tried shoe shopping online? Several places have free shipping, no taxes, and free return shipping so you really have nothing to lose. I have used http://www.shoebuy.com. Some of those places will say they have the lowest guaranteed price.
i love your new boots! a few years ago i got a pair of brown aerosole boots on clearance at famous footwear, and they are seriously my favorite pair of winter shoes – so comfortable (and my feet ALWAYS hurt!) and they have held up very, very well, too. And thanks so much for this post. Sometimes I forget that just because I have the money to buy what I “want” doesn’t mean I need it.
I know what you mean! I am trying to plan a VERY frugal, VERY short notice wedding. I have a friend that is telling me that I CAN’T possibly use PAPER plates…even though they are sooooo much pretty than the clear plastic ones she is suggesting! I have 8 weeks…..and I’m sure I’m going to have to hide from this woman or make her upset…..lol. I just felt like I was going to have a tacky wedding for my daughter if I didn’t listen to her…sheesh….
Hi Crystal!
Great post!
I also feel a twinge of “want something I don’t really need” the rare times I go to a mall. Thanks for posting your boots — they are beautiful and will last you a long time.
Don’t worry about the cost of them or feel you have to justify it to anyone.
I tend to buy well made, very classic styled clothing and this type of clothing and footwear does cost a good deal more than the super cheap alternatives. BUT, and this is a big but —- well made, classic items last me for years. So, for me, it is well worth the up front money.
Plus, they fit well, wear well and I feel really good in them. Sadly everytime I give into temptation to buy a cute little $10 top or summer sandles I am dreadfully sorry I did. The item, doesn’t fit right, wear well or last very long. In the end I’m left thinking, I’ve I would’ve bucked up and bought quality I would be enjoying the item for several seasons.
Take Care,
Trixie
I think I am more satisfied to stay out of friends and neighbor’s homes that are beautifully decorated, so I don’t feel dissatisifed in my own house, but I don’t find the need to wear beautiful clothes. I took my daughter shopping today though, and bought her some beautiful things that she felt she couldn’t afford. She’s 35 and I’m 57. I’m so glad we decided to go shopping. When I was 35, I wanted to wear nice things. Now I am 57 and have a closet full of nice things that I don’t wear. I’m happiest in my pajamas.
I have only been in a mall once in the past year and that was for holiday shopping when I decided I should expand my horizons beyond what was available in Walmart. While I felt underdressed in my normal jeans, t-shirt and sneakers, compared to all the ladies in their trendy fashions, it didn’t make me really want to spend to look like them. It just made me want to get out of there quickly, because I know that I don’t have fashion sense and would just “botch” the look if I tried it. On the other hand it was fun to look around at the stores and sales, but just to get an idea of how everyone else lives. Their sales still seemed overpriced to me.
Off-topic, but related, I had a FANTASTIC shopping trip at Dillon’s today, with $38 worth of stuff I paid less than $4 for. It was all due to your post the other day, and the links to the other websites and coupons. Thank you so, SO much!!!!
GREAT post! I was in an upscale shopping are earlier today. I remember thinking similar thoughts to myself.
You’re so right. I couldn’t agree more about staying out of the mall. I blogged about this recently myself in an entry called “the fulfilling frugal life” http://saverqueen.com/2008/10/29/the-fulfilling-frugal-life/ Even though I work next to The Eaton Centre, which is the 2nd biggest mall in Canada, I rarely go in, and when I do, its only to run an errand during my lunch break and get out asap. I avoid shopping and am soo much happier when I just avoid stores and malls. When I don’t shop, I feel completely content and at want for nothing. It’s only when I start shopping that I start to feel pressure to buy more, and I start to get ideas of things I want, or think I “should” have.
Definitely relating to this. I have struggled with clothing addiction.
I am currently dealing with many life transitions in regard to wardrobe. I am currently 9 months pregnant for the first time in my life and I have discovered a new aspect of “seasonal” wardrobe. I grew up in a place that is sunny and warm all year so I never learned warm/ cold clothing really at all and I am really trying to finally get the hang of it. Also, I just discovered modesty : ) No joking. So all those things have created a very new perspective for me as well as some challenges.
I am trying my best to streamline my wardrobe while still keeping in mind that pregnancy happens and so do weather changes…so I need to store things appropriately yet minimally. Let me tell you it’s especially a challenge when you gain so much pregnancy weight that literally nothing (underwear, socks etc.) will fit from pre-pregnancy.
It’s not just the mall. TV does it to me too. We don’t have cable, but when I’m at my mom’s she’s always watching HGTV or some kind of home improvement show. Those make me discontent. Maybe I should update the paint in the bedroom….maybe I do need a new bathroom re-do…maybe, maybe, maybe. If I don’t watch the shows I think that what we have is just fine.
Blessings–
Dana
I have really bad asthma that is flared up by dust, humidity and fabrics. I usually have trouble breathing in mall store because of the clothing flying around. It sounds really weird but it’s true. This developed the past few years and now I shop mostly online. Mostly old navy clearance. My husband is a really visual person that gets bored with me wearing the same thing over and over. This is the main reason why I buy more stuff. He really loves seeing me in something different and new, and he trusts that I don’t spend too much.
I haven’t read all the comments yet, but I am looking foreward to doing so. In reading your post, I am reminded of what my grandmother used to say. “What’s the big deal about having so many clothes? You can only wear one outfit at a time!” She was born in 1914, married in the midst of the Great Depression in 1935, worked hard and was satisfied with the simple life.
This is a great question – I have very mixed feelings on malls, and I think my reaction to them depends on my mood going in and how crowded it is. I’ve always been fascinated with mall architecture, their huge sweeping galleries, skylights, fountains, atriums, etc. I also have a lot of nostalgia for malls, since my family rarely went when I was little and when we did it was usually around holidays, my brother and I enjoyed making mischief on the long car rides there and back, and we savored the rare chance to eat fast food. I also love the smell of Cinnabon although I’m very good at passing it up! And if I’m in a good mood I get a kick out of people-watching and usually feel secure with my own belongings enough that I don’t want to buy anything, and I love this feeling! But, on moody and busy days, it’s everything everyone already said – gross, anxiety-causing, and usually makes me feel really bad about my body, much more so than my wardrobe. Thanks for the mall reflection opportunity Crystal!
This is good stuff to consider. I too get in that mode once I see the ad or go in the store. This fall I bought myself a few really great new things at a great price. But like you mentioned, then I got in a “shopping zone” and felt I needed more to make my wardrobe better. Guess what? I didn’t! The few items I bought at first are the ones I really like and keep wearing! So, now I feel overbought. Even though the items like shirts were only $5 a piece- didn’t need them.
I am in the process of trying to downsize everything! (Big undertaking I know!) I am getting rid of everything I don’t use. I already did my laundry room – I downsized so much, my DH is now building me an office in there! I am so excited! Then I can get all my office, bills, school stuff all organized. I’m working on my pantry now – goodbye rice cooker, Foreman grill, etc!!
Well someone bet me to it! I was going to mention a Sort and Swap (or as another poster put it a clothing exchange) I have not been to one in years. But it was fun when I did go. You can have one any time you want, just invite some friends over for a couple of hours one afternoon (preferably no kids) and have everyone bring any clothing, shoes or purses they are not using anymore and swap away. Have fun!!
I’ve recently started “mall walking” on some days when it is too chilly or rainy to walk outside. We have quite a few days here in Michigan when it just isn’t desirable or even safe to walk outside to walk outside and the mall is a nice, free alternative. Two things that help keep any discontentment at bay are 1.) I listen to Dave Ramsey’s podcast while I’m walking which makes the concept of spending the farthest thing on my mind and 2.) I arrive at the mall pretty early, after I drop my kiddo at school, and leave before any stores are open.
I guess I am not like y’all. I am fairly frugal, but I enjoy a good trip to the mall. In fact my husband encourages me to go once in a while and “buy something nice for myself”.
Another benefit to a simplified wardrobe is less laundry. Or so it seems anyway! Before I had my daughter I worked outside the home and had WAY too many clothes. I could last at least a week without doing laundry, so it would pile up to an intimidating pile. Now, with a pared down wardrobe, I keep up with the laundry because I have to, and seems much more manageable.
You are so right Crystal. I also avoid the mall. Since I’m not used to it, I actually tend to find it pretty unpleasant. I’ll go occasionally if there is a clear need – but for the most part I stay away for the same reasons you mentioned. Thanks for the great reminder. 🙂
Jennifer
Just wanted to say that you made an excellent choice of shoe. As someone who is on her feet all day (I teach 5th grade), it is worth the slightly higher-than-comfortable price of shoe, for the comfort it gives your feet at the end of a long day. I had to spend well over my comfort range for some decent shoes last winter, and they are still doing their job!
It’s obvious from both of your websites that you stay busy while at home, and with two little ones to chase after and being pregnant, well, you deserve all the comfort you can get!
I only go to the mall about 2 times a year. Its ususally with my mother who likes to meet my kids there for lunch (yes, in the 30-decible food court with hugely inflated prices). But, I do find myself shopping much more frequently during the holidays. This is where I realize my discontent. Whatever I am buying for the person on my list, this voice always says, “you could get one for yourself, too”. I face much more temptation just by being out there in the marketplace. So, this year I am doing much more homemade gifts. This way I won’t do as much shopping. I am doing baskets (buy at the thrift store or garage sales, spray paint, then use trendy, cool ribbon (found at Walmart) to tie a nice cheerful bow. Then I will fill them with personal care items, etc. that I have been getting at Walgreens, CVS, etc (for nearly free), and finally I will buy a couple items or a small gift card to round things out. These gift cards will require a shopping trip, but I find if I go with a specific thing in mind, I don’t “shop”-but just get in and out. The other day I went to the mall for a “free item with purchase” and I bought a $1 gift bag, and got my freebie. And another time, I went in with my coupon card and no matter how hard the sales lady tried to convince me I “needed” all the lovely, overpriced items, I stuck to my original plan and did not give in to the pressure. I don’t care if she thinks I’m cheap. Better to be thought of as cheap than have no self-control! Anyway, thanks for the thought provoking post! Glad you found some boots you needed.
I agree with you totally. In fact, I have to keep my Walmart visits to a minimum because it seems that i can’t just go there for a few things. I try to make it a game to see how long I can go without stepping foot in a store.
Now when it comes to clothes I am definitely not fashion conscious. If I find something I like that’s inexpensive i will buy 2 identical items. It doesn’t bother me in the least to wear the same clothes day after day (meaning I wear 1 outfit while the other is being washed – sometimes i don’t even WASH them the next day but wear them twice in a row – if I haven’t gotten dirty of course).
Thank you so much for your post Crystal, it is definantly what God wanted me to hear today. I have lost 41 pounds this year, my baby turns one on Thanksgiving day, doing weight watchers. I feel like weight watchers is worth the money because it keeps me motivated and helps us eat out sooo much less, plus in 4 weeks its free!
My problem is, or lack thereof, is I have never been a size 6 or a medium top so I need to buy all new clothes. Well, I went to some outlets and garage sales and I have 7 pants, 1 light jean, one dark jeans, one fancy jean, black pants, khaki pants and gray and brown cords which I got on super clearance. I have a few tops that I can mix and match and that is really all I need even though today I was telling my husband how bare my closet is. I still don’t have any dresses and would like one for church, my mom is buying me one for christmas. Thanks for letting me see how silly I was being, when I have plenty! God bless you!
I rarely go shopping unless I have a specific need to fill for the same reasons you described. I see all these people carrying around packages and all of the great “deals” and I want to jump and join the spending.
Furthermore, I have found that I actually have to watch myself at places like Walmart where I might go to buy groceries but then decide to swing by another department to look at something or “just to see.” I inevitably find something that I want and don’t actually need, and it’s a major struggle (that I sometimes lose) to walk away without buying it!
I go the mall so rarely. I find it easy to buy things for my husband and my son. My husband’s clothing needs are very specific. My son is little enough that most of his things can be found at yard sales. (No thrift shops nearby.) Still, I tend to overbuy for both of them. WHen little boy shirts are a quarter a piece, it’s hard to pass them up. I, however, and very hard to fit. Once every two years or so, I have a budget and a specific list and I get to go to a department store and pick out a few new pieces. Then it’s a treat.
Love the boots, Crystal! I have the same pair and they are very comfortable. Aerosoles is a great brand (so is Clarks!).
I find I’m the same way! And then my other problem, when I do have money to go shopping, I can’t make myself spend a bit more on good quality stuff, so I get cheap stuff all the way around…and then it just doesn’t last! LOL. Right now I am pregnant…so I’m going on the idea that I am not buying any more clothes for about two years! I know that may sound crazy…but before I got pregnant I was almost down to my “skinny” size, and my daughter was about 18 months. So I’m taking that into consideration, and I don’t want to buy anymore clothes until I can spend money on things that are good quality and that will last me and that are in my “skinny” size (who knows what that will be at this point!). I’m tested in this every week, because I go with my mom on Friday’s for lunch and we are almost always going shopping afterwards so she can get her some clothes! LOL. So far, so good…it will probably be harder for me after I have the baby!
I find that when I go to regular stores I am struck by sticker shock because I am so used to yard sales and thrift shopping! I used to love shopping, now it gives me anxiety!
Praise the Lord for those of you with the same struggles and issues – and similar thoughts – we’re really trying to simplify here. I totally agree with staying away from the mall, Kohls, and other places like that. I have to admit, though, that my computer can be just as bad as going to the mall – have to limit my time looking online and delete sale ads in my e-mails – they make me discontent as well.
We’re saving much more money with my shopping less and less. And now that my kids’ school situations have changed, I’m further away from Walmart – your posts for Walgreens/CVS have helped me to mostly shop at those stores for many items, along with doing groceries at Aldi and Kroger. I don’t even think I”ve been at Walmart in a month!
I’m being much more conscientious with God’s provision for our family. We are greatly blessed, but that’s no excuse for my negligence with wasting that blessing. I’m asking the Lord to help me to see how to use that blessing to bless others more.
I am helped so much with the tips from you and your readers from this website – may the Lord bless your day greatly.
Nicole
I consider every day that I stay out of stores a “savings” day, even if I was going to shop for the necessities. I, too, have two pairs of shoes I wear and replace when worn out. I don’t need a large wardrobe so can’t justify spending money on that and therefore don’t need to window shop in case I see something I want. And…when I stay home, I save gas money as well.
Well, I didn’t blog about it (shockingly, I must say), but I went to a clothing exchange last Saturday and scored …
2 pairs of shoes
2 pairs of jeans
1 pair of board shorts
2 pairs of capri-ish pants
5 sweatshirts
7 shirts
1 pair of sweats
2 hats
It was so much fun and all of us came home with cute, new (to us) clothes, without spending a dime!!
Kathy:
My maternity wardrobe is a little different than my regular wardrobe since it has to be a bit more versatile depending upon my mood or how the baby’s positioned. But here’s the basic gist of it:
Bottoms:
black, khaki, jean skirt
black and khaki pants
jeans
(still looking for a cute pair of maternity yoga pants–hope to find some at the thrift store!)
Tops:
4 nicer T-shirts for layering
2 solid-color knit tops with ties in back (Like this: http://www.motherhood.com/Product.asp?ViewSource=&Product_Id=74341506&category_Name=3%2F4+Sleeve&Category_Id=1506&MasterCategory_Id=3 I prefer maternity shirts with ties in back so I can just expand them as needed instead of having to move up in shirt size!)
3 solid/pin-striped collared shirts with ties in back (like this: http://www.motherhood.com/Product.asp?ViewSource=&Product_Id=62191513&category_Name=Long+Sleeve&Category_Id=1513&MasterCategory_Id=4)
1 black sweater (sort of like this: http://www.motherhood.com/Product.asp?ViewSource=&Product_Id=55958005&category_Name=New+Arrivals&Category_Id=8005&MasterCategory_Id=5)
(I’m still looking for some hoodies to help expand the mix and match possibilities for my casual clothes. Hoping to find them at the thrift store or on some great sale somewhere.)
And that’s pretty much it. Mostly everything in my wardrobe can be mixed and matched for an almost endless variety of outfits. I usually stick with Summer colors for tops–like blues, greens, purples, turquoise–as these are my colors. Keeps things simple.
I usually buy 2-3 new things per season to update my wardrobe a bit, but I try to stick with pretty classic styles. I then also get rid of 2-3 old things I’ve worn out so that it keeps things stream-lined and I don’t deal with unnecessary closet clutter.
Feel free to ask if you have more questions. Keeping my closet simple and stream-lined to mix-and-match clothes I like and that look well on me has been a huge help to me. Makes things so easy!
I have to deal with this feelings more in terms of goals. I have plenty of struggles with contentment but when I want to buy something or go to the mall I like to stop and think ….”Will this shirt bring me closer to building our own home that we own outright with enough rooms for all our children?” No ….well then put it back and be glad you did 🙂
Staying out of the stores, and especially the mall(s) is a HUGE way I am able to leave my excess. It is very, very hard to be satisfied with what you have when you shop a lot.
I guess I never thought people would want to know about the specific boots I got, but for those who asked, here you go:
http://www.famousfootwear.com/product.asp?product_id=1015902&variant_id=69724
I always croak at spending that much on a pair of shoes but I’ve found that paying a little bit more means they last me for a few years and hundreds of wears. I also had birthday money to spend so I guess that made it seem a little bit more palatable. 🙂
As one of my former pastors would say…
“Comparison kills contentment.”
So true!
I’d love to see what boots you got…I just bought a pair of black boots, and I was curious. I promise it won’t kill my contentment!
Crystal,
I know you’ve posted on this before but I wouldn’t begin to know where to search for it, so I was wondering if you would mind sharing again about your wardrobe. Might be a good thing for us to hear right before the holidays. Can you expand a little on what clothing items you have and how you mix and match?
I love your idea about having only 2 pairs of winter shoes. However, do you wear any brown with your black boots? Do you stick to only 1 or 2 neutral colors? Do you wear only solids? Also, I can’t remember, do you only skirts/dresses only or do you also wear pants?
Oh, and of course, pictures would be great! 🙂
Thanks in advance!
Can we see a picture of the boots? Seriously. Not to sound shallow or anything… 🙂
I have a few tips! To avoid my frustrations and temptations in this area, I try to purchase necessities online. This gives me time to wait for sales, coupons, and shipping offers to help me save money. I leave the item in the “cart” for a day or two to make sure it is the must have item. Returns are often easy to handle if something doesn’t work out. (For shoes, I recommend Zappos.com~ great customer service and no hassle return policy!) I have a picture of my goal (my dream house) taped on my wallet. It is a great reminder and makes me smile to know that once we have our dream home paid for in cash, I will have the freedom to purchase anything my heart desires (and it often brings up a great conversation with people too)! It sounds like you do love your few pieces of clothing, and that is key! Feeling beautiful and comfortable in a few items is much more important than having a stuffed closet, in my opinion.
I worked for two years at one of the more popular stores at the mall and it has broke me of any desire to go to the mall.
I learn to walk against the flow of traffic (otherwise you are constantly stopping behind groups of young giggling girls goggling some young boys or the occasional mom with the three wide stroller) and dart in and out of people.
I try to Shop alone and without other people who don’t know this trick, because they will slow me down.
I park near the fire exits near the actual stores. I use the fire exits for quick entries and exits (I have yet to hear them go off). But beware professional shoplifters like to use the exits for the same reason. So if security gives you an odd look that’s why.
And if I must MUST go during the holiday season, I go during the GAME. For us, it’s the Indianapolis Colts. The first time I walked into the mall during a Colts game, it was eerie and I was totally confused by the lack of people and the wealth of parking.
And finally don’t look anyone in the eye. The minute they make eye contact with you, those kiosk vendors turn rabid on you. They will yell at you, grope at your arm, and follow you like zombies. Well not zombies, but like salespeople who have a large quota to fill.
Anyway those are my suggestions. Good luck to everyone in the Holiday Shopping Game.
I love to get new things but I don’t do it that often. Although I would say I have more then I need most times I tend to have a weeks worth of clothes that I buy at the beginning of each season and then I wear them out. I just find stuff I like and sometimes buy them in different colors and then wear/wash and continue until I have gotten my good out of them. I purchased a few nice things for my new job when I have to dress up and when I go on home visits I can wear our company shirt and jeans so I am pretty lucky agian in the wardrobe area.
But I will be honest and say I don’t like the mall. I barely ever go there and never plan a trip there unless it is the only place I can get something. In my area the malls are being replaced by outside shopping strips. The trends have been that people like to go into the store they want and get out.
I don’t go to the mall anymore, not because I’m afraid I’ll buy a lot, but because of how nauseous it makes me feel to see so much “stuff”. How much stuff does one really need? Any where does this junk go when it doesn’t sell? Marshalls, TJMaxx, Ross, and then where? It seems like there’s more stuff than anyone could ever possibly buy. So much unneccessary waste! I’ve never been a big shopper, but the amount of excess never used to bother me until one day when I stepped into the mall during a lunch break and suddenly became overwhelmed with it. I tried going back a few times, but had the same reaction. I guess it’s good for my savings program!
I *Made* $5.00 at Walgreens last weekend and already have the money on my gift card!
I recently wrote on the Chicago Mom’s Blog about how a visit to the American Girl Place made me question my self-worth and my parenting.
http://svmomblog.typepad.com/chicago_moms/2008/10/i-took-my-4-yea.html#comment-137145833
Thank you for your post! I have been thinking a lot lately about accountability and self control – two things that based on the daily newspaper many Americans don’t have. I haven’t been in a mall in over two years and unless my kids need shoes I really try not to shop. I too have returned home from a shopping trip grumpy and discontent with what I have. It is so easy to want and want and want – I am so glad I have a husband and friends that don’t place value on material possessions. It is refreshing to read your blogs.
Thank you for sharing this struggle. I experienced the very same thing a couple of weeks ago. We lived overseas and left the country we lived in to have our 1st baby in a different country and we were not allowed back in to the country we call home. We came back to America with two suitcases, one of which was filled with baby things. Our family lives on one income so it doesn’t leave a lot of room for buying clothing. As I searched for something to wear a couple weeks ago I was suddenly ashamed and then the Lord convicted me that I was placing my worth in clothing. It is easy to let these thoughts creep in, so I’ve been praying against this and being thankful for the clothes the Lord has provided. (Oh and avoiding the mall.)
I tend to avoid the malls because the costs there are so high and really I can find the the same things other places much cheaper and without having to deal with all the people! I am not a “people” person. Plus everytime we go there one of the kids or myself end up sick with colds.
I had to buy new boots this year too (my old ones were 10 yrs old and falling apart) I opted for Cabela’s though and got some really nice ones for alot less than the mall and I know they will last another 10 years!
I SO needed to read this right now! I literally JUST got home from Kohl’s “Super Saturday Sale.” I got up early to go because of the early bird specials and I had an extra 15% off coupon and $10 in Kohl’s Cash from a gift purchase I made a couple of weeks ago. The Kohl’s Cash expired today, so I thought it would be a perfect time to use it, combined with the sales and my coupon.
I found all kinds of things I liked, but ended up not buying any of it because I kept going back and forth in my head saying, “Do I really need it? How much will I really wear it?” (I bought a fleece for my daughter with the Kohl’s Cash for a great deal, and that was it). I came home and my husband could tell I was in a bad mood, when I should’ve been in a good mood because I just got to spend a couple of hours by myself shopping! I started explaining my frustration with shopping because I have such trouble spending money on myself but then when I really could use a certain item of clothing, I don’t have it because I couldn’t bring myself to spend the money, even if it was a good deal.
But what I’ve realized after reading your post is that it’s all rooted in discontentment. I DON’T need any of those things. They’re just things. I have plenty of clothes; more than enough than I need. And going to the stores just feeds the discontentment, you’re so right.
So thank you (and thank You, Lord, for Your timely reminder!) for sharing this.
Yes, I admit, when I go to the mall (so rarely) I find myself wanting to be different, have more things, look more like the people there…which is silly because after I’m out of there I have buyers remorse and (with a breathe of fresh air) realize that it’s all so overdone.
I think it helps to not go often. I still want nice things & always have something that I’m looking for…but it’s much more fun and creative to hunt for it at the thrift store (on 99c Mondays, of course!).
I am SO glad that I’m not the only mama to feel like this! It’s the same way with saving money. As long as I don’t spend it, I can save it all day long. But as soon as I start spending it, I KEEP spending it! It’s horrible.
I love your blog! I read your column this morning on going to the mall, and I so totally relate to your feelings on that trip. I used to “mall walk” for exercise, put my sweet peas in the stroller and do several circuits around a big mall to be inside out of the rain. (Oregon is a very rainy state. Don’t be fooled when the national news says we’re having a “drought”. We call it a “breather” around here!) The last time I went to the mall I remember feeling so “discontent” with myself and how I looked when I left. I have not shopped there ever since (and let’s see, that baby is now…..oh, 10 years old!)
I have to stay away from Kohl’s. I always want EVERYTHING in there and always leave feeling very depressed about my lack of wardrobe-dedicated income! It is very silly! So I only go when I have birthday money or Christmas money to spend.
I never just “shop” anywhere so I don’t really look around to feel that way. I have a mission to get in/get out as quickly as possible since I’m usually shopping with boys, all of whom feel shopping is a punishment!