Early Friday morning, Kathrynne (15) got on a plane to fly to Suriname (in South America) for 9 days with a teacher and a small group of girls from school. (This picture was taken at a park there yesterday.)
This is the girl who — just 5 years ago — was scared and completely uncomfortable to be around kids her age. This is the girl who has struggled with so many panic attacks and anxiety. The girl who was incredibly angry with us when we made the decision to put her in school after always homeschooling (she was so fearful of having to be around kids she didn’t know and to be in so many unknown situations all day long). This was the girl who was terrified to get on a plane to South Africa with us just 4 years ago.
It’s our heart’s desire to raise self-sufficient adults, not co-dependent children. So over the past 5 years, we’ve slowly pushed her to do a lot of uncomfortable things, because we knew the only way she would grow wings and fly was if we gently nudged her out of the safety of our little nest.
We often wondered if we were making the right call and we spent a lot of time crying out to God for wisdom and direction for the next step. God has been so faithful to give us wisdom — even when it’s meant making really hard calls (like quitting homeschooling).
We look at her now and see that is was SO worth it — she’s a confident, outgoing 15-year-old with more friends than we can keep track of and a social calendar we struggle to keep up with. A girl who loves Jesus, life, adventure, travel, and people. A girl who excitedly jumped at the chance to go on trip to Suriname (her first international trip without us)!
We’re still finding our way in what it looks like to parent teens. And I know we’ve made plenty of missteps. But we continue to just look to the Lord to give us wisdom for each new day, each new situation, each new unknown… and we trust Him to be faithful!
Also, watching your kids go on their own adventures, jump out of their comfort zone, stretch themselves, and live courageously is one of the most rewarding things as a parent… even if it involves a lot of our own letting go! 😉
Tackling the Timely Topic of Fear
On this week’s episode of the podcast, Jesse and I tackle the timely topic of fear. We discuss the current fears over recent tornadoes in our area, COVID-19, political unrest, sending our daughter to Suriname, and a recent situation of a lot of unknowns with potentially fostering a newborn.
If you struggle with fear — especially when it comes to unknowns or your kids — I think this episode will really encourage you. Fear isn’t necessarily a bad thing; it’s how you choose to act as a result of that fear.
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In This Episode:
[01:44] Our area was hit by some devastating tornadoes, which is rare and has shaken up our community.
[03:33] On top of that, the first case of COVID-19 was reported in our area the day we recorded this. We also just sent our daughter on a plane to spend 9 days in Suriname and we’ve walked through a lot of unknowns in foster care. We’ll talk more about what we’re learning from all of this later on in the show.
[05:14] But first, AT&Ts international plan is saving Jesse’s life right now and lotion is saving my life this week.
[08:52] To go along with this week’s theme of fear, my book pick is one I highly recommend:Raising Worry-Free Girls.
[11:41] We’ve been receiving some amazingly kind reviews on the podcast lately. Thank you!
[14:44] Get ready to dive into fear. First, I share the entire emotional journey we went through while waiting to potentially foster a newborn. (We’re still waiting on the call!)
[19:00] How I let go of the fear and anxiety I was feeling around this whole fostering situation. It wasn’t easy, but it was so good for me to work through.
[21:13] We discuss the emotional turmoil our community is feeling with the tornadoes, COVID-19, and political unrest and we share lessons and thoughts on fear.
[23:31] Did you know fear can actually be helpful and isn’t necessarily a bad thing?
[24:25] Fear can either propel you to healthy action or paralyze you from taking action.
[26:20] We want to raise adults. Letting Kathrynne go on this trip and prep for this trip is one more step in the right direction.
[28:38] How are you going to act or react when fear arises?
Links and Resources:
- Sprigs and Twigs
- Raising Worry-Free Girls by Sissy Goff
- CrystalPaine.com
- MoneySavingMom.com
- YourBloggingMentor.com
- My Instagram account (I’d love for you to follow me there! I usually hop on at least a few times per day and share behind-the-scenes photos and videos, my grocery store hauls, funny stories, or just anything I’m pondering or would like your advice or feedback on!)
- Have feedback on the show or suggestions for future episodes or topics? Send me an email: crystal@moneysavingmom.com
How to Listen to The Crystal Paine Show
The podcast is available on iTunes, Android, Stitcher, and Spotify. You can listen online through the direct player here. OR, a much easier way to listen is by subscribing to the podcast through a free podcast app on your phone. (Find instructions for how to subscribe to a podcast here.)
Ready to dive in and listen? Hit the player above or search for “The Crystal Paine Show” on your favorite podcast app.
Crystal, If you liked the Raising Worry Free Girls and Siegal’s other book you read recently (I forget which one you read at the moment), Siegal’s Parenting from the Inside Out might also be a nice fit for you. It explores the idea that the parent’s own “stuff” contributes to anxiety states in their kids, and is really great and empowering for parents and kids!
I just bought that one and have it on my shelf! THANK YOU for encouraging me to read it! It looks so good!
I love her spirit and courage! Thank you (and your daughter) for sharing this great story. How far to nudge is something I’m working on as well in our family.
Thank you so much for your encouragement!
I just read this book about the topic of fear and it was really, really good!
Afraid of All the Things: Tornadoes, Cancer, Adoption, and Other Stuff You Need the Gospel For http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/39096764-afraid-of-all-the-things
Thank you so much for sharing!
The insight is excellent. I will say this it is important to build immune system the best way you can. The thing with Tornados that was crazy. I hope it brings the community together because in A lot of cities so many dont like each other because of crazy things. All we can do is pray and build bridges. I will not let fear stopped me. Keep up the great insight.
Thanks so much for your encouragement!