How Our Emergency Fund Gave Us Peace In the Midst of Grief

Note from Crystal: Today is Valentine’s Day and I thought this beautiful post was such a great reminder of the importance of not taking any of our relationships with those we love for granted. In addition, it’s fitting because baby Kyle was due today, on Valentine’s Day.

Testimonial from Kim of Kimz Kitchen

I’ve always been a planner. And when we decided to try for our third little baby back in October of 2011, we knew we should begin setting aside cash for our high deductible insurance plan. Using our Health Savings Account, we were able to set aside money (tax free) each week from my husband’s paychecks.

I was also very thankful that we had our Emergency Fund. After two miscarriages and a few medical bills that our insurance didn’t cover, we again realized the importance of keeping that fund stocked at all times.

In June of 2012, we found out we were pregnant again. We were ecstatic! But, in August, we found out our sweet baby boy, Kyle Nathaniel, had a fatal genetic condition that would most likely claim his life before he was even born. This was certainly not in MY perfect plans.

As agonizing as the next several months were, the financial costs of a labor and delivery — immediately followed by a funeral and burial, were not a concern to us.

Little Kyle was born into Heaven after 31 wonderful weeks of life where he knew only love — right into Heaven, where he’ll forever know only love. God allowed his precious tiny body to be born into our arms on December 19th, 2012.

At that point, our HSA was funded to cover our deductible, and our emergency fund was available to cover the costs of the burial 3 days after his birth.

Our little guy had a huge impact on thousands during his short life. Even now, his video is being shown in crisis pregnancy centers and in OBGYN offices around the country. His memorial fund for Compassion International will sponsor a Mother Baby Survival Center in South America for 39 months.

I wouldn’t trade the 220 days we had with him for anything.

Now, as we are recovering, we are working to restock our fund. I’ve kept my grieving mind and and empty hands busy this month de-cluttering our home and selling our things on Craigslist. There are even a few local “yard sale” Facebook pages I’ve had great success with selling things on.

We spent the month of January living on a tight budget, with minimal eating out and only spending money on necessary things, to put all of our extra cash into our emergency fund, and at this point, we’re pretty close to getting it right back to where it was a few months ago.

Sometimes, I think we think of that emergency fund as being a go-to account for flat tires, or blown transmissions, or repairing central heating units. I never planned to use it to bury one of my children. And while our specific case is certainly rare, having an unexpected expense that you haven’t planned for is not. I can’t say enough about the peace of mind that an emergency fund can give when peace can otherwise be very difficult to find.

Kim Rackley is a blogger at Kimz Kitchen. She’s the wife of a very special guy and mother to two girls here and three children in Heaven. She blogs about her life as a mother, homeschooler, and a small potatoes caterer.

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  1. says

    Dear Kim, I am so sorry for the loss of your sweet Kyle and his 2 angel sibs. Thank you for sharing your story with us all, and for reminding us that life is, indeed, fleeting and precious. That’s wonderful that the Compassion International memorial fund will go on to help other families in need. As bereaved parents, we have the capability to create beautiful legacies for our little ones, once our hearts have had a chance to heal a bit from the devastating loss experience :’) Hugs to you and your dear family, both here on earth and in Heaven. -Suzanne

    • Sarah says


      I would search on facebook for your town and yardsale. Forexample: “Harrisburg yardsale page”. Once you get into one you can usually be directed to others that may be more popular or more geared to your specific items.

  2. Janet says

    My father passed away this year. My parents have no savings to speak of–so a few years back my siblings and I started an emergency fund to help themwith medical expenses when needed. It was such a blessing that we had almost the exact amount in savings that the funeral cost. This brought so much peace of mind to my Mom and to the whole family.

  3. Angie S. says

    My sincerest condolences on the loss of your precious child. What a beautiful portrait! I wish 24 years ago when I lost my son Joshua at 31 weeks they would have had photographers who did this so I would have a loving memory like yours.

  4. Heather H says

    Beautiful tribute and a wonderful reminder of how God works in amazing ways. We, too, have shared this experience. Our first baby, our daughter, was due in 2005 and was stillborn at 29 weeks due to a cord accident in utero. Between then and 2009 we lost an additional 4 babies ranging from weeks 13 to 24…some were genetic issues we later found out, others we were not able to tell. We knew that if God wanted us to be parents to our own child, it will be done and finally in April of 2009 I gave birth to our sweet baby girl, who was born at 27 weeks and feisty as ever. She survived and is a happy, bright and energetic child who will be 4 this year! You would never know she was a mirco-preemie. I missed the negative comments, but I have heard them before myself. We know that in the midst of such pain, God was with us always. We know we will learn that lesson one day, but we rejoice in the peace of having our daughter as our hope for being parents was fullfilled. Blessings to your family! May you continue to honor your son through your testimony.

  5. Michele says

    Your video made me weep. My firstborn is named Kyle. Two years after he was born healthy and happy, we lost a baby girl at 20 weeks to Trisomy 21. Delivering her was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. God bless you and your family, and especially sweet Kyle.

  6. Heather Teate says

    I am so thankful you took this opportunity to share how God brings hope through grief. Know that we love you and continue to pray for you and your family! Our little Jubilee is playing with Kyle and your other babies in heaven today :)

  7. Rebecca says

    Its amazing how God’s plans emerge through heartache and sadness. His light is shining because you took what is a unthinkable tragity and turned it around to help others. What a wonderful way to remember your son!! I am in awe of your love and faith. Beautiful. <3

  8. Shannon Garrett says

    I am watching the video that you made about Baby Kyle. Like you, I was diagnosed as carrying a Trisomy 18 baby. They told me to go home, put my legs up, and pray cause my baby wasnt going to make it. As it turns out the baby miscarried. Although I went through the loss, I had an amazingly beautiful little girl who is now almost 15. Hugs and prayers to your family!!

  9. Sarah says

    I sobbed as I watched the video. What a sweet testimony. I am deeply moved at your faith and trust in God’s plan, when it was so different from yours. Thank you for testifying God’s glory. Prayers for your family.

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