I just got a less-than-nice comment from someone about our van situation. The basic gist of the comment was (I’ll edit the part out calling me a liar, etc.): "Why on earth if your husband is an attorney and you make money from home can you not just go out and get a new vehicle??"
Since there are quite a number of people who read this blog, rude
comments are pretty normal and I’m pretty used to it–it’s part of blogging in a public forum. However, after I deleted the comment, I got to thinking…
You know, we could go buy a vehicle. We could take our emergency fund money and go buy another used vehicle or even a new vehicle. We could take our house savings and go buy another vehicle. We could even do what most normal Americans do and just go take out a loan for a new car.
But here’s the deal: while we have money in our bank account, we don’t have money saved or allotted for a new vehicle or even a used vehicle. And guess what that means? We aren’t buying a new vehicle or even a new-to-us vehicle. Not right now at least.
We had money to pay for the car repairs, we don’t have money to pay for a new vehicle right now. We’re very hopeful that the mechanic will have our van in good working order by tonight and we’re very hopeful that after replacing just about everything there is to replace on it, the van should run beautifully like it used to.
What we thought was a small problem with the van has mushroomed into weeks of work. Just when we thought it was fixed, something else would go wrong with it and we’d have to take it back to the mechanic again. It has been a much longer and costlier process than we were ever expecting and yes, it’s been frustrating, but that doesn’t mean we just throw in the towel and go buy another vehicle.
Have we considered buying a new vehicle? Absolutely! Do we wish we had piles of cash sitting around without a name on them so we could just go buy a new vehicle and forget all the hassle of trying to get our much-used van fixed? You better believe it!
But you know what? Waiting until we can afford to buy something and trying to make do with what we currently have is how most people used to live. We’re learning patience, we’re learning flexibility, and we’re learning to be content with what we have.
We still have one running vehicle and if need be, we can go back to being a one-car family again. It’s not my first choice, but we did it for a few years and I’m willing to do it again.
Yes, we’re "living like no one else". Yes, a lot of people think we’re really crazy. Yes, sharing what I share on my blog means that some people aren’t going to understand, are going to question why we’re doing what we’re doing, and some people will say rude comments about our life choices.
You know what, though? While I don’t like car problems and I’d not have chosen the kinks in our plans they’ve resulted in the last few weeks, I’d much prefer to wait until I can afford something before I buy it. I much prefer not having to live paycheck-to-paycheck. And I much prefer not being slave to the bondage of debt.
We’re living like no one else so that someday we can live and give like no one else!
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I am so glad to see that others don’t run out and buy new cars too! I feel like everyone does because new cars in driveways are the norms in our neighborhood/community. We run our cars into the ground – 180,000 on our last car, 230K before that. Then we bought a new/used car to replace it with only 15,000 miles but was 4 years old. It was a great deal for us! We are also a family of 4 still driving around in, yes, a 4 door car because it gets better gas mileage. Thanks for the post of encouragement for those who drive in cheaper transportation, yes I see those nice cars people drive but don’t want to interest rates or stress of paying for them.
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AMEN to that Crystal! Seriously, some people need to GET A LIFE and stop the judging everyone. Sheesh.
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You’re not living like “no one else.” There’s at least one other family out there that’s choosing to save instead of spend – us! You’re not being strange and stubborn if you choose not to buy a new vehicle; you’re being wise and economical, which are fast becoming lost values. It’s great that there are people who still choose to live within their means.
Rock on!
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I will say upfront that I have not read all the comments. However, as an attorney, I must pipe up. NOT ALL ATTORNEYS MAKE A BUNCH OF MONEY!!! I am fortunate enough to make a comfortable–not lavish–living. Attorneys who go into public service (prosecutors, public defenders, legal aid, court clerks, etc.) frequently make very low salaries–and these people often have staggering student loans.
Having said that, bravo to you for refusing to go along w/ the consumerist herd!
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Okay, so I found another expression for ya:
“Mediocrity always attacks Excellence”
Heard that little gem on Oprah. Love It!
“Sometimes when people criticize you, they are on to something.
Sometimes when people criticize you, YOU are on to something.”
I still say keep doing what you are doing. I spent $14 @ CVS yesterday and got $35 worth or products, THANKS TO YOUR TEACHINGS!!!!!!
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Amen, Sista!
It’s your life and I think you’re fully entitled to live it the way YOU choose! Not only that…but if everyone went out and bought a “brand new something” every time something went wrong with their “used something” then we would be an even more wasteful society than we already are! Good luck with the van and good for you for sticking to your goals!
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Amen Sister!
Having been on the side of having credit/loans for cars, house, etc. and then in one fell swoop having a good paying job yanked out from dh’s feet with NO savings was a HUGE wakeup for us. We lost one vehicle, almost lost the other, and most importantly almost lost our home. We ended up in bankruptcy. Not a pretty road to travel down.
It’s was a long 5 years … read as struggling from paycheck to paycheck. We still have our house mortgage to pay but that’s it now. I am going back to the frugality mindset I once had before the loans and such came into effect. We now drive a used 12 passenger van that we paid cash for ($1,500) and hubby has a company truck he drives to work. He has a farm truck that was given to us by a former boss that he usually around the property occasionally.
I’ve always been frugal but I got lax on it for a while honestly and I am determined to stay on track now.
We still don’t have savings but that will change too as we will start doing our best to put money into it as well as stickign to a budget (regardless).
Frugality isn’t always easy but it can be fulfilling to know that you’re not “blowing” money for something just because you can get credit or whatever. (we couldn’t right now if we wanted too… that’s a blessing that we can’t!)
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I am so sorry that this person was rude to you. I am APPLAUDING you for your lifestyle and all of you young people that GET IT! My DH and I retired at 54 and 53 with no debt what so ever- a paid off brand new home and car and plenty of money to get us to the ages of 100 without worry – even in this rough economy right now. We lived on our own terms and didn’t care about what the JONES were doing. Although I often wonder if the JONES are retired early or even now. Bet they aren’t! So Crystal and everyone else who GETS IT, do your own thing and be proud of it!
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First of all I have to say it’s none of the rude posters business how much money you have. Sometimes people speak or type before they think.
Your doing a great job. I commend you.
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amen! and we don’t think you are crazy! you go girl!
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People say ugly things when they are jealous. Hopefully we can all pray for that person that they will find real happiness.
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Good for you guys. Dave would be proud.
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It is unfortunate that the “normal” thinking of people is to go buy new cars, bigger houses, etc. when you get a good raise or have a promising career. I believe that is why our country is in the financial shape it is in. My husband earns a substantial amount; and we could have purchased a house twice as big and replaced his 21 year old car. Instead like you, we have chosen to keep the car, live in a smaller house and SAVE our money. Good for you not letting the rude comments influence you. Those are usually stated by those who are either not content or unsatisfied with their own life. God Bless you & keep up the great work!
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Good for you Crystal!! My husband and I are in a similar situation – he is an engineer and I am a stay at home mom to our little girl with a second blessing on the way. Of my mommy friends, I was the only one who even considered not going back to work as soon as my maternity leave was up (we get one year in Canada). I constantly get comments from everyone on how “lucky” I am to be able to stay home, as they don’t realize that engineers don’t make a boat load of money, either, and that we make use of coupons and deals and frugal habits to allow me to stay home. And we only have one vehicle, which is definitely an anomaly to everyone we know. We find it difficult when even things like going out to dinner come up (when we have not budgeted for the expense). Thanks for the encouragement, and knowing that we’re not alone in the pursuit of serving the Lord first and not looking to others to determine what we “need”.
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Can I just say that it saddens me that you would get ANY mean comments with all the good that you are trying to do here? We also are trying to live like no one else and we make choices that I am sure people might not understand, but that is perfectly ok. We love our life just the way it is and I am proud of you for being so willing to share your heart with us!
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Chin up, my friend. You’re doing just the right thing.
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I agree with you totally! People think we are nuts because we live in a trailer (mobile home), have two used cars, no cable, no cell phone (trac phone for emergencies) and don’t have a lot of credit card debt. But then I laugh at people I work with who HAVE to work overtime (up to 80 hours a week) just to make their MINIMUM payments.
Thanks for being brave! God Bless!
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Thanks for this post. We have always lived finantially responsibly and I admit, it gets old sometimes. There is no major debt hanging over our heads (just the mortgage and some old student loans w/ a low low rate), but there is also no money for much other that the bare basics. It is easy to feel like a “have not” sometimes because we really are living like “no one else.” I just keep reminding myself that I wanted to stay home and raise my son and that is the most imporant luxury of all!
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I can relate to your situation, and I think you made the right choice. I too am an attorney, and people do automatically think we “get paid the big bucks”. Oddly, they never seem to focus on how much it cost me to get to be an attorney. I graduated in 2001 with $97K in student loans, and it was paid off, while working for a low-paying government job, by Sept. 2006!!! Now I am married, have my own solo practice, and we live debt free. We rent (it is half the price of owning) and are saving to buy a home without a mortgage. We are a one car family; my husband commutes via bike year-round (and we live in Madison, Wis). Keep with your plan, but accept that the majority of Americans will be puzzled and possibly hostile. It is worth it though, once the bills are gone and the funds start rising, a calm peace of mind takes over. Best wishes!
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I like your idea of “living like no one else”. I think as parents – we need to be leaders in our homes, and set the standards. We have chosen to live frugally on one income. My husband is a professional. One day I woke up in debt and realized that were weren’t keeping up with the Joneses– we were the Joneses!! I changed that morning. We have taken a radically different path– and I feel so much freer. I don’t really care if someone thinks I should have a new car. My old Saab runs just fine thank you very much. I think that I am more easygoing now and can relax a bit more and really enjoy my kids more. We live frugally now- but better. We eat better quality food, which is cheaper than processed food. We play in the park and go swimming in the river and fly kites & today I picked blueberries. I guess I would just encourage people to take a risk and just follow your heart. Being able to afford staying home to raise my kids has been such a blessing for our family. We sacrificed my income– but we gained so much more.
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