Read Part 1 of this series here.
3. Get Your Home & Life in Reasonable Order
Once you’ve determined to streamline your life and set some goals, now it’s time to crack the whip and make changes in your life. While you might want to jump in and start clipping coupons or chasing bargains — don’t!
If your home isn’t in reasonable order and you already feel like things are spinning out of control, adding more things to your to-do list is only going to create chaos and frustration.
Take a step back and look around your home: what are the biggest areas you are struggling with? Laundry? Piles of clutter? Lack of organization or a plan? Too much to do?
Take inventory of your current time usage: are your priorities in order? Are you spending time enjoying and loving on your family members? Are you getting enough rest? Do you have margin in your life? Are the unimportant things crowding out the important?
If you feel like you are living in complete chaos, you need to do major cutting from your life. Say “no” to outside commitments and responsibilities. Don’t feel obligated to other people. Don’t start anything new.
Instead, stay home, make a simple plan for your days (my upcoming series on Time Management will hopefully be very beneficial in helping you there!) and stick with it. A plan doesn’t work unless you do!
Your home and life didn’t get out of control in one day and they are not going get back under control in one day, but you can make baby steps in the right direction every single day. So, determine what are your biggest problem areas and begin attacking those one at a time.
(There’s much more I could say on this subject, but I’m going to save it for my Time Management series which I’m beginning on Friday.)
4. Create a Workable Budget
Once your home is beginning to start to get in order (and, in most cases, that will take a few weeks), then it’s time to tackle budgeting.
Yes, I said the “B” word. You gotta make a budget.
You know why? Because if you do nothing else when it comes to finances — if you never clip a coupon, never buy used and never eat leftovers — but you devise a simple zero-based budget and you follow it, you’ll benefit a great deal.
A workable zero-based budget is going to take work. It won’t just happen. But if you commit to making it and then following it, it will very likely change your world — and your financial situation!
For more help with creating a zero-based budget, I highly recommend you check out The Total Money Makeover from your library. You can also read Dave’s article on The Truth About Budgeting. And here are some free downloadable budgeting forms to get you started.
If you’ve never had a budget before, expect it to take at least three months to get a workable budget in place. The first few months you’ll likely overfund some categories and underfund others; it’s a work in progress, so don’t worry if you don’t get it right the first few times. You’ll see headway just by trying, I promise!
I also highly recommend that you use cash envelopes for much of your spending categories. This guarantees that you stay within the budget parameters because, with cash, when it’s gone, it’s gone.
Stay tuned for tomorrow’s post on babysteps towards better financial success!
What would be your top tip or piece of advice for someone who is feeling like their life and home is chaotic and disorderly?
photo by Muffet
Yvonne says
We were eatting out a lot. I sat down with my family and told them we were going to take on a challenge that I saw on, Oprah given by another finacial guru named Suze Orman. We went without eatting out for 21 days, it was really hard the first week and then it just go easier and easier, yes I did have to go grocery shopping and spend enough so that we didn’t run out of food and then I didn’t have an excuse and yes I did have to cook more, but I found that by cooking for my family we spend more time together at home and enjoyed each others company more. The children whined a lot at first, they missed those times I would just run thru a drive thru before or after an activity, but waiting until we got home and fixing meals I had bought purposely for such occassions, made us all appreciate waiting. And Oh My Goodness the money we really saved. Our restaurant bill was $600 per month and that was CRAZY. With that, we were able to pay off outstanding bills that caused lack of sleep and fighting with husband. Now that we are on a sane budget my husband have more time to get along and less to fight about. We know what we can spend on what and save for what we want. No more credit card interest and bills taking out extra money, and spending cash makes you spend a whole lot less. It hurts when you spend cash and really makes you think twice about those implusive purchases. I used to spend a lot of money on-line and just type in my credit card numbers. Now when I am typing in my debit card numbers I know that money will be gone. I was addicted to getting what I considered presents in the mail from all my favorite on-line stores. Now I shop at discount stores and consignment and plan on hitting up the garage sales next spring.
Joyce @ Joyful Creations at Home says
My best advice to conquer a chaotic life is….
Get up before your children do!
I have been doing the Hello Mornings Challenge with Kat@Inspired to Action. I am getting up around 5 am every morning. I do my computer work, quiet time and exercise. Then I jump in the shower as the youngest of my 4 are waking up. My oldest said it best, “Mommy you are always more grouchy when you have to shower in the morning!” She is right….if I have to shower after they are awake that means I did not get up early and I am behind. Then, I am definitely grouchy! BTW…this means I have to go to bed by 10 every night….I have to get off the computer at night and get my sleep or this plan does not work:)
Crystal says
I so agree! I’ll be talking more about this in the Time Management series as it’s one of my keys to efficiency!
Karen says
Soon after my daughter was born, (she’ll be 1 in a couple of weeks)and I felt like I wasn’t ever going to get anything done again, I created a very basic daily schedule. Any spare time that day goes to that activity. It keeps me focused.
Monday: Cooking. I think about what we are going to eat for the week and do prep. If I have extra time or energy I will make something for the freezer. Doing this on Monday is good because I don’t have to think to much about dinner the rest of the week.
Tuesday: Ironing/Mending/Organize clothing. My husband needs dress shirts ironed for work. He has enough so that I can iron ever other week. The other week I will do some organizing in the drawers or closets or mending etc.
Wednesday: Bills. I don’t have bills to pay every week but it helps to look at the budget and checking account weekly to keep things in order. We have worked hard to become debt free and I feel much better when the money is in order.
Thursday: Grocery List. I make my menus, grocery list and clip the coupons from the paper. This takes longer some weeks because I do a larger trip every 2-3 weeks.
Friday: Papers/Clutter or other project. I clean up the paper clutter or work on a different project.
Saturday: This changes weekly because my husband is home. I sometimes grocery shop on Saturday or do errands that are easier if the baby is home with daddy.
Sunday: Rest. This is actually a hard one. I see all the things that still need to be done. But we really need the rest and family time.
I also do 2 loads of laundry each day including diapers. I am very lucky to have a husband that cleans. He folds laundry and loads and unloads the dishwasher each morning. He also does at least half of the house cleaning on the weekends. He is a neat freak and way better at cleaning than I am. Our house would be a disaster if it wasn’t for him. I wouldn’t be able to keep up on my own.
Laurie says
Thanks so much for the excellent posts, Crystal! I just want to comment for those who are having difficulty budgeting with an irregular income. My husband and I are in that situation, and I just love the budgeting program YNAB (You Need A Budget). It isn’t free, but I paid somewhere in the neighborhood of $35 for it several years ago, and it was definitely worth it! I’ve tried several other free budgeting programs and just couldn’t get them to work well with an irregular income. The premise with YNAB is that you get to the point where you’re a month ahead, so whatever we make this month is what we have to budget with in November, etc. I have found it to be very simple to use and so helpful!
Cassie Petersen says
Hello Ladies,
This is the first time I have ever commented on this blog, but I have been a reader for a long time. I greatly enjoy your posts, Crystal- thanks for taking the time to share ways to save money with us!
As for disorganization and chaos in one’s life, I do know a few things about that as I am a mother of 4 young children. As much as I love a tidy house, tidy finances, and tidy children who operate on my tidy schedule, this rarely comes together all at once! So, the most important thing for me is a tidy attitude that is organized and cheerful. If I can keep a positive, sweet spirit that is gracious and kind, then outward disorganization will not shake me. Blessings to all,
Cassie
Alyssa says
@Cassie Petersen,
It is very true what you said about having a cheerful attitude. I often find myself barking orders at my fiance “do this, do that, why don’t you…”. But I think it’s very important to step back and try not to worry about everything that can be done all the time, because then you are forcing stress onto everyone else in the household.
Jo says
I started getting rid of just one item a day and it has made such a difference! I call it Purge a Day and it can be something big or something small, it makes no difference as long as one item a day is leaving either via trash, recycle, back to it’s original owner, donation or by selling. A sweater no longer worn, small stack of magazines no longer read, wore out shoes, an outgrown toy, that old throw rug you keep vacuuming around and hate, anything! To keep me motivated, I try to take a pic of the item each day and keep in a folder on my computer…may be weird but it’s funny to go back and look at some of the stuff I hung on to for so long. I promise it won’t take long to feel the difference.
Deanne says
I’m the person who wrote in, and I just want to thank you, Crystal, for this amazing series! It was like a metaphorical deep breath for me–I feel like I can really do this now, one step at a time. Many thanks to your amazing readers for their brilliant suggestions, as well. I read every single comment and took notes!
Crystal says
You are most welcome! The comments have been amazing; I’ve been soaking up the wisdom from my readers, too!
Nony (A Slob Comes Clean) says
I’ve been working for over a year on getting my home in order. I’m a naturally DISorganized person when it comes to stuff. (Give me a group of people or a big project and I’m in my element.)
I started by focusing on one small change at a time. Conquering something that used to baffle me (like keeping my kitchen clean) until it felt natural, became a habit, and made sense to me. Little by little, I added (and am still adding) more tasks. It’s a long process if you’re a natural-born-slob like I am, but it is possible to figure out ways to keep your home in order that will work for you, even though they may be different from they way others do it.
Faith says
My husband and I started a zero based budget with cash envelopes a while back and it is working wonders for us. I came across an awesome website with interactive worksheets that we used for our budget. Here is the link to that website to that worksheet:
http://www.gailvazoxlade.com/resources/interactive_budget_worksheet.html
She also has several other interactive worksheets available here:
http://www.gailvazoxlade.com/resources.html
Jennifer says
@Faith, I love this lady’s show. I get so much out of it!
MamaLaundry says
The best piece of advice here: *Stay home*
It took me until baby #3 to figure that out. But the more we stay home, the less money we spend, the cleaner our house is, the less clutter we bring into our house, and we’re just generally more content! I wish I had only figured it out sooner!
-Lauren
Trina says
My best tip would be to use a timer! A couple of years ago my husband and I found out that setting the timer for a mere 15 minutes can get A LOT done! Whether it be for cleaning, emptying out the car, going through too small kids clothes, organizing finances, or decluttering a certain area…15 minutes is a small enough amount of time to not feel overwhelmed, but a large enough amount of time to made a big difference.
Trina
theresa says
we are just a few months into the dave ramsey budgeting deal (which has overall been a tremendous blessing to our family), and i scoffed at using actual envelopes for my budgeted amount for clothes, groceries, and household supplies – and guess what? – i have spent every penny every month – and i really wanted to have a little extra for all the great seasonal toy and grocery sales in the next two months – my new budget begins on the 1st and i have already got my envelopes labeled!
Jen says
If you want to get your grocery spending under control with very little time for couponing, you could start with this:
begin by basing your menu around the sales at the stores.
I used to decide whatever we wanted to eat for the week and then just go shop. By looking at the flyers FIRST and making a simple menu off of what’s on sale, you can get started saving a bit, and that momentum will inspire you!
Heather@Family Friendly Frugality says
@Jen,
I totally agree! I used to spend $200 plus at the grocery store. Last week I needed a break from couponing and just shopped the store ads. I spent $80 and saved $13. Just from store ads alone!
Might not sound impressive but I came home with just as much stuff as I used to when I would spend $200 a week, except for only $80
LoveToShop says
I have to say the only thing I would say is more difficult than you make it sound is budget, especially for us. My husband is on a commission based automotive pay(he’s a mechanic in other words) and anyone who is married/related to one can tell you in a heartbeat, one check can be great and a budget would be fine, and the next check is TERRIBLE and you struggle to make ends meet. Beyond that I agree whole-heartedly that the house needs to be straight first, get all that done before ever trying to jump on doing deals!
Alysia says
@LoveToShop,
I totally agree! My husband gets a regular paycheck, but as a self-employed hairstylist, my weekly take-home can vary by several hundred dollars! I am at a total loss on how to budget such an irregular income. Basically, my husbands check covers our regular monthly bills and daycare. So my pay is spent on groceries, gas, clothing, and all the extra’s of life with three kids. So if I have a slow week at work, we buy gas and groceries and that’s it. Well if the next week is good, we play “catch-up” on all the things we couln’t buy last week. And then the cycle starts all over again!
Emily says
@Alysia, I think that regardless of a families income (fixed or irregular), budgeting is a challenging thing to do because most families have irregular expenses even if they have fixed income. Yes, we all have those expenses that are static, like our mortgage/rent, cell phone bill, cable bill, student loan payments, car payments, etc. But, we also all have many expenses that vary from month to month, often depending on the time of year (such as electricity, water/sewer, and gas) or depending on situations (car repairs, home repairs, etc). It’s really hard to get a real sense of how much money needs to be spent each month to keep a household going, often because the same amount of money isn’t being spent each month. For those families with irregular incomes, it’s even harder (my husband used to be in sales, so I do know what those irregular paychecks are like).
I didn’t start hardcore budgeting until about a year and a half ago. I had always thought that I had a pretty good idea of our monthly bills, but sitting down and actually figuring things out overwhelmed me (I think because it scared me). I followed in the advice of my favorite financial expert, Suze Orman, and I started tracking every penny we were spending (and I mean every penny) over the course of a year (but actually now, I just continue to track every penny because I like knowing what kinds of things we spend our money on). That way, you can take a whole year’s worth of expenses and figure out how much money you should be setting aside per month for all your expenses, even if they don’t occur regularly. While I was doing that, I started making expense categories to organize things more, and I started to come up with what I thought was a good, reasonable amount of money that needed to be put toward each category per month (again, even if we weren’t necessarily going to spend that money in a particular month). It was and still is hard work and a work in progress, because I’ve come to find out that what I may have thought was the right amount of money for a particular category is really way off, and I’ve had to tweak things quite a bit.
Once I got a handle on what we were actually spending, I followed some great advice that I read in a book (I think called something like “America’s Cheapest Family Gets You Right on the Money”). I set up mini accounts in my checking account (only on paper of course), and I started dividing up our paychecks into these small accounts (basically, I started telling our money where to go as it came in). Now, this would of course be much harder on an irregular income, but if there is any way you can make it work, I highly recommend it. It was (and still is) very freeing and liberating to finally take control of the money, tell it where to go, and then know the “balance” in each of our accounts for all of our expense categories at any given time. Now, if we need something or foresee an expense coming up, I just check the balance in that account and see if we have the money for it. Seems simple, but I wouldn’t have thought of it myself, and it has changed me and the way I budget money forever!
Crystal says
If it makes you feel any better, we’ve not lived fixed income for, well, most of our married life. What we found worked best is to have a budget for the barebones and a budget for the extras. We cover the barebones first and then, if there are leftovers, we set some aside for the leaner months and then use the extra to cover some of the extras (like things we are saving for, etc.). During the leaner months, we can then tap into the extra savings, if need be, to cover the barebones.
Alysia says
@Crystal,
Great advice, THANKS! I was just at such a loss at how to work the budget, so I avoided it alltogether. But doing SOMETHING has got to be better than what we’ve been doing.
Amy says
@Crystal,
One thing that has helped us learn how to budget with my husband commission income has been to make our budget, figure all the bills, cost, extras then go back and figure out how much we need his check to be. By keeping our money going out as low as possible it allows us to make more then we need. So lets say his check is $300 more then what we “need” it to be then that gets transfered right over to savings and the budget goes on. Then on a month that is under what we need we have this pool of money to draw on. Once that gets built up a bit we can move some of it to savings or different goals (like paying off our last credit card!)
Deb says
@LoveToShop, My dh was on commission a long time ago. It really stunk as it was third party pay and if someone returned an item (hearing aids), that commission came back out of his paycheck, so they varied greatly. We always paid our fixed bills first and that did not include groceries, just the bills that we HAD to pay and got a statement for.
I know that Dave Ramsey has you put food way ahead of other things and I understand that, you have to eat, but when we were broke college students (under grad and grad), I found that food was really the one thing (besides baby clothes) that people were most likely to share. My parents and inlaws would give us groceries and once our church gave us a basket at Thanksgiving, but no one was going to pay our electric or phone bill. I have also always found that groceries are the easiest to cut back on, whereas you can only reduce your fixed bills so much. I can always eat ramen, but not in the dark! =) I will add that we did not have credit card bills, only student loans when he was on commission, so when we listed out our bills, we didn’t have to deal with that hassle.
We never missed a meal or a bill (and there were times of great concern) and are debt free except our house now. I believe that God blesses when we fulfill our obligations and are good stewards.
LoveToShop says
@Deb, as great as a helping hand every so often sounds, we are the helping hand in our family. We already do the budget thing for food, necessities first(bills in the order of importance, if the checks are bad enough then they just don’t all get taken care of, my kiddos have to eat something!)….couponing has helped us cover a great deal of expense, but I have to say winter scares me. At this point our motto is spend as little as possible and when possible, spend nothing!
Lana says
When I was younger laundry was hit or miss-oh no we will not have any clean socks tomorrow if I don’t do laundry today! For 20 plus years I have had a laundry schedule and the stress of that is gone.
Monday-clothes
Tuesday-towels and cleaning rags
Wednesday-rotating scedule of children’s bedding, shower curtains and washable rugs, etc
Thursday-clothes
Friday-towels
Saturday-parents bedding
This has really helped me. I also have a 4 week rotating list of cleaning chores that breaks it all down and makes sure that I get to everything including the baseboards. Also, that way my house is always presentable for guests and I just don’t have to stress about it because I know every cleaning chore will get done as long as I do my few chores everyday.
Sarah says
Lana,
I love the laundry schedule-and I would LOVE to see your 4 week cleaning chores schedule if you are willing to share!
Lana says
@Sarah, I am going to tell you the chores that I do and how often and you should customize your lists to your house. I only clean the upstairs bathrooms every 2 weeks as they don’t get much use but that wouldn’t work for most people with kids at home-ours are married/away at college.
Weekly-
vaccuum all carpeting
clean all non carpeted floors, mop as needed
Shake all throw rugs
blow the deck, screenporch, sidewalks, and driveway
scrub the kitchen sink
clean the downstairs half bath
clean the stovetop
vaccuum area rugs
empty small trashcans
Bi-weekly
dust furniture, chair rails and window frames
clean master bath
clean kids bath
mop the kitchen floor
wipe kitchen cabinets
clean the car’s interiors
clean the laundry room-wipe down the machines, clean the sink and counter
clean glass-stormdoors, TV screen, etc.
Monthly-
wipe bathroom and laundry room cabinets
dust light fixtures and lamp shades
dust baseboards
dust doorframes and tops of doors
straighten bookshelves
thorough clean of kitchen counters-moving everything in the process
dust down cobwebs
clean out the refrigerator and wipe down the interior
wipe down all kitchen appliances
dust frames of French doors-I have a bunch of them-if you build a house you don’t want the cleaning task of these!!
dust doors and closet doors
dust picture frames
Start by listing your weekly chores on 4 sheets of paper. I do chores Mon-Sat.
Then add in your biweekly ones and than add in the monthly ones. It took me about 8-12 weeks of fine tuning to get this right for me. It seems like alot to do but I typically do 3 jobs a day and that is not too much. I am much older than most of you!! After I had it the way I wanted it I made 4 charts on small peices of poster board-about 7×10-I punched 2 holes in the top of each and they all hang it a stack on 2 small nails inside a kitchen cabinet door. I put the list to the back after I finish each week. My house stays amazingly clean with not much daily effort. I do not have small children so it is different for me, when the grand kids are here I really see a difference in the amount of daily sweeping and such but I know that under the crumbs the house is clean.
Sonya says
@Lana, Thanks! As you said, I’m sure it will take a little tweeking with an itty-bitty in the house, but it’s great to have a starting point! Oh, and please don’t get the idea that we’re wallowing in filth, lol. I just din’t have any sort of routine.
Lana says
@Sarah, AAArgh! I typed all that in and clicked submit and it is not there. Sorry! I don’t have time today to type it in again.
Lisa Bell says
@Sarah, I would love to see it too! I wish someone would just come and create one for me to follow…if its on paper and i can check it off, it will get done. But if its just floating in my head somewhere, chances are I will forget about it until its to late and I say, “Oh I will just do it tomorrow, then when tomorrow comes I have forgotten all about it.” Partial blame for that goes to my natural air-headedness, but also from a car accident that has left me with some memory issues. So I function best when I can have a list to visually go off of. It would really be great to see how someone else does it. Thanks
Sonya says
@Lana, I would love to see your cleaning schedule! That’s my biggest problem area, and with a baby about to start crawling, my house needs cleaning.
Lana says
@Sonya, Really frustrated!!! I typed all that in and it dissapeared when I clicked submit. Sorry-no time to go it all again today.
Crystal says
It’s there — it got stuck in spam because the comment was so long!
Lana says
@Sonya, It is there in the end, yeah, I didn’t do all that typing for nothing!
Crissy says
@Sonya, I found one to purchase for a calendar year. It is at motivatedmoms.com . It was truly life changing when I ordered it. It is worth the $8 they charge for it! Good luck!
Deb says
I agree totally, when mine were little, (my oldest was not even 4 when we had #3), I rarely went out. It was just too much work and they just didn’t need to go anywhere besides church and the doctor. We had friends over to play and visit, but just the running around (errand) type stuff, I avoided. I would do my running after my husband got home from work or our church had a mother’s morning out once a month that was a lifesaver.
One thing I might do, if I had it to do over, would be to pick one high dollar item like diapers and spend the time to find the best price for those. If you have two in diapers like I did, it can really add up to save money in that area. There were not the online options like there are now when mine were small, so we normally bought them at Sam’s and we were so blessed to have grandparents who would pick them up for us on occasion. =) It is overwhelming to try to cut back in every area at once, but if you start with one, and see some savings, it helps to get the ball rolling.
I will say that staying home in and of itself saves money, not just gas, but the temptation to eat out, and just ‘seeing’ things that you think you need. Somehow if you don’t see them, the temptation is just not there. I can go my whole life without something and give me an hour in Target and I just cannot survive without it! =)
Angel G. says
Start getting rid of things. If you can’t get your house in order, you have too much stuff. Be brutal, and start bailing clutter out. Don’t wait for a garage sale…Take it to charity….If you are not going to be able to get to a charity, give it away or toss it. Get rid of it the day you cut it from your life. It is freeing and if it isn’t there, you don’t have to clean it up!
Jill says
@Angel G., I have trouble getting rid of stuff hence I have a lot stuff. I could use someone to come to my house and help me get rid of it. Who actually gets a certificate for completing there years of wearing braces and actually keeps it. It was over 20 years old but it felt good when I was able to throw it away.
Brie says
When I’m feeling overwhelmed, it’s hard for me to even get up off the couch and do anything, because it just seems so futile. But I’ve found that if I set a timer for 15 minutes and use that time to pick up clutter and put things away, the house begins to look better and it encourages me to tackle another project.
Christine M. says
You are spot on when you talk about first getting your house in order . I’ve tried to plunge into being a coupon guru but it doesn’t work if your house is disorganized it actually makes it a much bigger chore and you end up pushing it off . Thanks for your words of wisdom . My biggest problem is laundry . It seem like I tackle it one day and I feel accomplished and feel like I have room to breathe but then I abuse that room to breathe and I end up in the same situation that I started with (mountains of laundry again) !
Marie says
@Christine M., me too!
Amber says
@Christine M., Me three!
CityFlips says
I’m a grad student and even though I can’t relate to the kids part, I can totally relate to the lack of time part! Regarding the budget…the 3 month work in progress is so true. I’ve been at it for 3 whole months and still don’t have it perfected. On the up-side I haven’t used a credit card the entire 3 months, so there’s no harm done! I need to work on organizing the home life and saying no to outside obligations that keep me from making progress towards peace.
Dana @ Budget Dietitian says
I also LOVE this post. Something I am working on. Who cares of I get the greatest deals but haven’t spend good time with my kids and the house is a disaster?!?!?!
http://lindyandjeanne.blogspot.com/ says
I have just started to join Crystal in leading a more simple life. I started off with getting rid of toys (you have a 4 month old so probably don’t need to do that yet). Then I moved into the medicine cabinet, almost everything was expired. Yesterday, I cleaned out almost all of my kitchen cabinets, got rid of some pots and pans that I haven’t used in six years, it was hard because they were expensive, but crowding my cabinets. Now, I just open the cabinets to marvel at how organized they are…I’m weird like that. Just the small amount of organization has reduced the stress in my life significantly, I feel I have more patients with my kids because my environment is orderly. Too much stuff doesn’t bring joy, it takes it away!
Jill says
@http://lindyandjeanne.blogspot.com/, I agree and am trying to lead a more simpler life with less clutter. I have a husband though that stops me from getting rid of things. I am taking it day by day and doing a little at a time since I have a lot of stuff. My goal is to declutter my house which will intern help me declutter my life. My problem is that I start projects but a diffult time in seeing then through. It is with post like this that help motivate me to continue on. Thanks!!
http://lindyandjeanne.blogspot.com/ says
Just the small amount of decluttering I have accomplished so far has reduced the amount of stress in my life. I’m yelling less at my kids and feeling less overwhelmed!
Sarah says
@Jill,
My husband was resistant to all the decluttering I was doing at first, too. I’ve tried to never, ever get rid of anything that belonged to him. I started with my own stuff (plenty to declutter there!) and he’s grown to appreciate how much the effort is worth. He even has gotten rid of a lot of stuff on his own, without me having to push him.
As to motivation, this is a big challenge 🙂
Raleigh Mommy says
Aaah, yes, priorities! SO important to remember “first things first”. Something that’s been rumbling around in my head lately is that my husband doesn’t work full time so that I can stay home and spend time on the computer all day (or whatever else is distracting me at the moment). I have responsibilities and those need to come first.
Amber says
@Raleigh Mommy, So true! I say something like that to myself sometimes. “Is my husband killing himself at work so that we can go to McDonald’s when I don’t feel like cooking? I don’t think so!”
Sharon says
I think you are so very right about removing clutter from your life. It is just an energy-killer…. you spend too much time looking at the piles of “stuff” and worrying about when you are ever going to get through it all! I think the key to tackling it- is to try to do one small step per day. Start with the room where you spend the most time- usually the kitchen. My method for cleaning and de-cluttering here (when I have let it get out of control), is what I can a “left to right clean up”. I start with whatever pile is furthest on the left, and I start cleaning it up, and putting things away. Maybe set a timer for 15 minutes, and when the timer goes off, stop. Tackle 15 more minutes later in the day or the next, until you work through the entire kitchen.
I would also like to comment on the “big picture” goal setting. I did a post a few weeks ago that I called “Begin with the End in Mind”, after Stephen Covey’s 2nd habit (from 7 Habits of Highly Effective People):
http://momof6.com/2010/09/24/my-game-plans/plans-to-manage-your-time-schedule-and-goals/begin-with-the-end-in-mind/
It speaks to the idea of creating a long term vision for your family- so you will know what you are working towards!
Warmly,
Sharon
http://www.momof6.com
Ashley Godoy says
Wow, what great posts with such wonderful practical suggestions! It was really encouraging to read this today, considering I have felt like I haven’t had enough time in a day. When really I am just afraid to not have time for certain things, therefore turn everything down ‘outside the house’. I think the stay at home thing is important but I might take it to extreme due to fear of losing all my time. I started a simple inventory of time usage, like you suggested, and wow! It destresses everything! It gives you perspective. I do have time to work with, I just need to be purposeful with it. I would encourage taking a simple INVENTORY of time like posted with the purpose of weeding out the unneccessary and faith-FULL-y adding the needed activities. Thanks!
Val says
Excellent post Crystal – you hit the nail on the head in #3! Such truth – thanks for reminding me of my goal… getting my home back in order. 🙂
Jenni@Life from the Roof says
My advice would be to emphasize the “Stay at home” part of a stay-at-home mom. I’m all for getting together with friends and their kids, or taking the kids out if you have to run errands or you go on an occasional outing, but for me at least, my life runs a lot more smoothly on the days that I stay at home more. I’m there to cook dinner, pick up things/clean when the kids get occupied with something else, and get more done in general. But I think that this can also be applied in terms of computer time and how we use it. I think the overall idea would be to be as present as possible in the life you have.
zena says
@Jenni@Life from the Roof, I agree with this 100 percent. Also, I allot myself computer times throughout the day, b/c as everyone knows, if you say you’re going for ‘just 5 minutes’ it usually turns into 45!
Brandy says
@Jenni@Life from the Roof, Just to add to this, if you are going to be gone one day doing things with other SAHM or running errands or a special outing, plan ahead for it. Take the time to pack every thing up in the car and get everything ready the night before. Have your bag full of extra clothes, wipes, diapers, or whatever it is you need when your family goes out and put it in the car. Pack any lunches that need packing and place in the fridge so it can be a grab and go. Pick out clothes and iron anything that needs it. If you’re going to need browned ground beef for the next night’s dinner, go ahead and brown it. Straighten up the house and get chores like laundry and dishes done. Bathe all of the children the night before. Some of these can be done during nap time or even when the kids are awake…they can help! (except infants of course!) Then when the next day comes, you will enjoy your day so much more because everything is done and when you come you won’t have a load of stuff hanging over your head.
Jenni@Life from the Roof says
@Brandy, Yes, I still am working on this part, but realizing the benefits of it. I don’t know why it takes so long for it to click sometimes that doing things the day before, or at least a bit in advance, is helping me more than anyone else. I like the idea of doing some of the next day’s chores the night before – that’s usually the part I hate most about going out – when I come home, everything seems to be in disarray because I don’t feel like I’ve gotten that much done.
WilliamB says
@Jenni@Life from the Roof, I’ve come to realize that time has different value depending on when I use it. Time on weekday mornings is very expensive. Time on weekend afternoons is cheap. Time on weekday evenings is middling.
It’s sometimes hard for me to get motivated to lay my clothes out the night before when all I want to do is veg out, even thought I know better.
Then I have mornings such as today’s: I overslept dramatically and if I didn’t have my lunch packed, my clothes laid out, my bag emptied & restocked, I would have been late – for a meeting I organized. Ooops.
Melissa says
@Brandy, this is great advice!
Rhiannon says
I am loving these posts! Although I can say that I coupon and search out deals, I feel as though I am missing the mark on all the other areas.
I am working on getting my home under control with FLY Lady (http://flylady.com) and I could not be more pleased, and at least when it comes to my home I am not living in CHAOS! But as I stated before, I am missing the mark in the other areas. I am so thankful for your new series!
I know that I have some down time at work tomorrow and I will be working on my budget and creating my envelopes! Thank you for the advice, information, encouragement and inspiration!
Rhiannon