Ever have weeks when you feel like you’re failing at everything? Here’s hope and practical help!
This past week felt like one fail after another.
I had some pressing deadlines, we’re in the midst of some fairly big business decisions, some things I poured a lot of effort into sort of just fell flat, our child who is usually obedient and cheerful was the exact opposite this week, and, ahem, there’s this thing called PMS rearing it’s ugly head.
So it was kind of the perfect storm this week. And I got sucked right into the vortex and let it bring me down.
I yelled at my kids (I know, I know — I need to read and heed my own advice there), I was irritated at my husband, I was short with some of my team members, and I did a lot of personal beating up of myself.
In fact, one child brought me this oil and kindly suggested I try rubbing some of it on, as they said, “You could really use it.”
I think that was code for, “We’d really like a peaceful and calm mom instead of the grumpy, frustrated mom who has been hanging out at our house a lot this week.”
As I thought back over last week and what I could learn from it, here are six things I’m working on implementing into my life to help me pull out of the “failure slump” and begin this next week with fresh resolve:
1. Ask Forgiveness
I am not and can not be a perfect mother. I will mess up and fail.
When that happens, I have a choice: I can beat myself up over my short-comings and sulk in shame over my inadequacies or I can ask forgiveness of my family and the Lord and ask God for His grace and enabling to have a quiet and loving spirit toward those closest to me.
These opportunities to humble myself and ask forgiveness can be powerful examples to my children — and something I hope they remember when they make mistakes and mess up.
2. Remember Your Blessings
It’s easy to get bogged down and overwhelmed by everything going on around us. Life is full of hard things, tough decisions, and difficult people.
Last week, I let outside stress impact my inner peace. Instead of choosing to focus on all of the amazing blessings in my life, I let a compilation of a lot of small things press in and frustrate me.
As I often say, “You can’t always change your circumstances, but you can always choose your attitude.” This coming week, I want to remind myself often to pay attention to the many blessings in my life and live my days in gratefulness for those.
3. Get Some Fresh Perspective
Sometimes, you just need some fresh perspective on life. Whether that’s doing something to serve someone else, getting out of the house, doing something you’ve never done before, or taking a break from a project or situation that is causing you to feel anxious.
This weekend, I chose to “check out” of a lot of business stuff and move some self-imposed deadlines to later and instead spend a lot of extra time hanging out with my family, serving at church, spending time with friends, grocery shopping, and just soaking up some breathing room. It’s amazing what this little “vacation from the obligations” did for my soul.
I’ve become such a firm believer in getting enough sleep. It makes such a difference in just about every area of our lives.
If you’re feeling uptight or stressed or want to pull your hair out over a hard thing in your life, stop and do a sleep check. Have you been getting adequate sleep most nights this week? If not, do all you can to make it a priority over the next few days — even if it means you have to let some other things in your life slide.
When you are operating on a “full tank of sleep”, you are much more apt to feel calm and peaceful and cheerful — even in the middle of a lot of stressful situations. Sleep is something I’m going to make a high priority this week and I’m guessing that doing so will make a big difference for me.
5. Be Honest About Your Struggles
Don’t try to pretend that you have it all together. When someone asks you how you are, if you’re not doing so well, be honest.
Let them know that it’s been a hard week, that you’re struggling with something, or that you’re feeling discouraged over something. Don’t carry all the weight of these burdens on your shoulders and then just answer “fine” or “good” when someone asks you how you’re doing. Authenticity and vulnerability breeds some of the deepest, most beautiful relationships.
When I posted about my mom fails on Instagram on Friday, I was amazed at how many moms were feeling the same way and how me just being open about it gave them a safe place to share their own struggles, too.
6. Remember That You’re Not Alone
No matter what you’re going through, know this: you’re not alone. You’re not the only one who is struggling or feeling like a failure.
You’re not the only one who has yelled at your kids this week, gotten somewhere incredibly late, looked in the mirror and felt discouraged by what you saw looking back at you, had an argument with your husband, wanted to just go disappear for a few hours and find this thing called peace and quiet, felt out of place, received devastating news… or whatever else it was that happened to you this week.
You aren’t alone. And that’s one reason I love this community here — and the overflow on Facebook and Instagram. It gives us a place to be honest and to share our heartaches and hurts and to hear that others are dealing with some of the same things, too.
Are you struggling right now, too? Tell us about it in the comments. We’re here for you and we’d love to listen, encourage, and pray for you.
And if you’re not struggling right now, maybe you could take a moment to share some words of encouragement in the comments for those here who are struggling? There’s no such thing as too much encouragement!