Welcome to my weekly post where we take a break from money-related posts and I share about what I’m loving right now and give you a little peek into our life from the past week.
You guys. I never thought I would be a pet person. Ever. Um, well, Quill has changed all of that.
Earlier this week, I was showing the ladies at my Discipleship Group *pictures of him on my phone.* And then I caught myself and was like, “Who are you anymore?!?” Well, apparently, this little guys has weazled his way into our hearts… including my formerly-non-pet-loving heart. 🙂
I spent all of Saturday at a retreat with the ladies from our Discipleship Group group at church. We had sessions, we had team building exercises (here we were given the challenge of getting 11 ladies onto this platform with no feet touching the ground — we came up with a creative solution!), and some in-depth small group time. It was so good!
I just love how much this boy loves baseball! Their team has struggled to win games this year, so he was so excited that they won two of their three games this week!
I don’t share many pictures or videos of Kathrynne online per her request, but she gave me permission to share this. I just love watching how much this girl loves life. [She had came straight home from Jiu Jitsu in this photo and (still in her GI) started in on her homework. ?]
This year, as I’ve changed the way I’ve parented, my relationship with her has grown so much richer. We used to butt heads a lot; now she’s one of my closest friends.
I used to struggle to get to her to open up. Now she and I have long heart-to-heart conversations multiple times per week.
She tells me often, “Mom, I love when you hang out with my friends. They all think you’re so cool. And I do, too.”
I’m so grateful that God opened up my eyes to how I was micromanaging my kids and helped me to change from parenting for behavioral modification to parenting out of a heart to point my kids to Jesus and the Gospel.
I’m a work in progress, but the fruit of these changes in my relationships with my kids has blown me away.
Last year, I just didn’t know how I was going to survive the teen years. Now, I can say with all honesty, I’m excited about them! Thank You, Jesus!
One of the highlights of this past week: getting to hang out with MacKenzie and her friend, Rebekah, who were in town for a conference.
Links You Should Check Out
- Looking for a filling, delicious, and cost-effective recipe? Try this Southwest Chicken Casserole. It’s so easy to make, it’s a crowd-pleaser, and it’s perfect for a cool fall evening!
- Feeling exhausted and overwhelmed? I’m doing a LIVE webinar on Tuesday afternoon on 3 Strategies to Stop Feeling So Overwhelmed. Sign up for this free webinar here.
- I’m excited because we launched a brand-new blogging course this week all about WordPress! If techie stuff scares you and you’re intimidated by blogging, you’ll want to check out WordPress 101 (and it’s just $27 through Sunday evening).
- Thinking of starting a blog? Sign up for my 3 Steps to Start That Blog You’ve Been Dreaming Of *live* webinar I’ll be teaching on Monday evening. It’s free! Sign up here.
Nicole says
Is there anything you can recommend on this discipleship program? I NEED this kind of perspective on parenting.
Beth says
Have you shared in a post somewhere more specifically the ways you’ve changed your parenting or the details of what you’re doing differently? I want to learn from you! My oldest is 11 and both my husband and I butt heads with her a lot, and I know something drastic needs to change in our relationship. I would love to be able to say she’s one of my closest friends, instead of being irritated by her much of the time, and her being upset with me! I feel like I’m going to lose her to her peers in the next couple of years if something doesn’t change.
Krystal @ Simple Finance Mom says
LOVE your perspective on parenting. We definitely should shepherd their hearts more than modify their behaviors. Such a great lesson. And how sweet that she loves when you hang out with her friends too?!?!?
Crystal Paine says
I know! I LOVE that!!
Jodi says
This really spoke to me. I am a micromanager of my two girls and while it “works” with the younger one, it is putting a great burden on my relationship with my almost 8 year old. I love what you said about “parenting out of a heart to point my kids to Jesus and the Gospel.” That’s what I want and what I’m praying for our family. I’m reading a book called, “The Connected Child” which is actually intended for adoptive parents which we are not. I just picked it up at the library so haven’t gotten too far but it was recommended to me by a counselor. She advised that we can’t just have structure alone. Kids need structure but they also need nurturing. I’m the queen of structure but I forget about nurturing which is the opposite of Jesus. He always was more concerned about the hearts of people and did not demand a religious obedience based on fear. I have a lot of learn so I appreciate your story. It gives me hope!!
Crystal Paine says
Thanks so much for these good words! And I’m grateful that what I shared encouraged you!
Jennifer says
What influenced the change in parenting style? Was there a book that you recommend that you read?
Crystal Paine says
It was going through the Discipleship Program at our church and really truly understanding what the Gospel means for my every day life.
Sam says
Can you please share,any ideas what you are doing differently in parenting.
Crystal Paine says
It was really just understanding what the Gospel truly is (that it is finished! I don’t have to try harder, do more, be better, etc. — I can rest in His finished work on the Cross and parent out of the love He has for me) and how I could stop trying to parent for behavioral modification and instead parent to nurture and love my kids and walk with them and point them to Jesus.
Beth @ Natural Mama Cafe says
Thank you for being real, and sharing your parenting struggles. This post really encouraged me, because I worry about the teen years too. I have three girls, and the oldest is 8. I know I fall into micromanaging sometimes, and I want to get away from it. It is helpful to hear that God has guided you through it. <3
Crystal Paine says
I’m so grateful that this encouraged you!
Emma Burroughs says
Crystal! I need a book recommendation!!
Crystal Paine says
Most of this was from the discipleship program I went through at our church that our pastor put together.