It was 2009. My third baby had just been born. I was beginning “official” homeschooling with my five-year-old, my two-year-old was potty-training, my husband’s law firm was still getting off the ground, I was battling postpartum depression, and this blog had mushroomed into something far beyond what I’d envisioned requiring hours of effort each week to run.
Everything felt out of whack. I was overworked, overwhelmed, and exhausted — and I wasn’t doing a good job of being a wife, mom, homeschooler, homemaker, or a blogger. In addition, my health was suffering a great deal from the strain and fatigue of trying to juggle it all.
I knew something had to give… but what? I kept telling myself that if I just got more organized, pushed harder, and slept less I’d be able to find a way to do it all.
However, a better schedule, more productivity, or shorter nights wasn’t the magical fix. In fact, it was the exact opposite: I desperately needed to do less, have more margin in my schedule, and get more sleep at night.
It took me a few more months — and getting to the end of my rope physically and emotionally — for me to wake up to the fact that I needed to do an extreme paring down of my responsibilities in order to reclaim my health, find breathing room in my day, and start enjoying life more.
Thanks to my husband’s gentle yet persistent prodding, I finally accepted that I’m not superwoman, relinquished many things on my plate, and brought on some help. Since then, I have come to a beautiful place where I am enjoying both motherhood and blogging.
I’m not going to tell you that it’s always easy — because it’s not. In fact, I’ve worked harder and been stretched further in the last few years than I ever envisioned I was capable of. At the same time, though, I’m invigorated and energized by the responsibilities on my plate, instead of being drained and exhausted by them.
What brought about the change? Well, here are four things:
1. I’m Embracing My Callings
Writing is my passion. I can’t not write. It’s how I process things and it’s richly cathartic to me. If you left me on a desert island and I had no laptop, no paper, and no pen, I’m pretty positive I’d find a stick and start writing in the sand. It’s in my blood.
Despite this, for years, I shied away from admitting that God had called me to be both writer and mom. I guess I was scared that I’d be judged or something if I openly made it known that I was both. That someone might think less of me as a mom if mothering wasn’t all I did.
When I finally owned the fact that I’m a writer through and through and a mom through and through, it changed my whole approach to life. I stopped living in fear and shying away from what God has called me to. Instead, I wholeheartedly jumped into this journey and determined to figure out how to do both well.
2. I’ve Changed My Definition of “Healthy Balance”
The longer I do this dance of blogging and motherhood, the more I’ve come to believe that the notion of “perfect balance” is a misnomer. At any given time, something in your life is going to be requiring more time and energy, be it the baby who is teething, the friend who is going through a crisis, the child who is sick, the writing deadline that is looming, or the blog host that is down.
When my husband and I attended one of Dave Ramsey’s EntreLeadership events, Dave confirmed this to me by saying that we should test whether or not we have balance in our lives by viewing how much time we’ve devoted to each area of priority in our life over the course of a year — not the course of a day or week.
There are going to be days when the blog gets shelved for playing in the snow or caring for a sick child or reaching out to a needy friend. In the same way, it’s also okay if your kids occasionally have a PJ & Movie Saturday or you have your husband pick up carryout for dinner because you were holed up finishing a writing project.
When you have a healthy balance, blogging can bless your family and energize you as a mom. When things are out of balance, a pretty good indicator is that your blog will feel like a burden, or conversely, your mothering responsibilities will feel like a burden. When either of these happen, the best thing is to take a step back, reevaluate your responsibilities, and see what needs to change or be let go of altogether.
3. I’ve Delegated and Dumped Dozens of Responsibilities
I believe wholeheartedly that delegation and dumping are the keys to success as a business owner and blogger. Your blog can control you or you can control your blog.
When you make the choice to be the one dictating your blogging schedule and responsibilities, it’s going to mean saying “no”. You can’t be at everyone else’s beck and call. You can’t chase after every new idea. You can’t experiment with every new blogging widget or plugin.
You’ve gotta set your foot down, create boundaries, and just say “no”. That doesn’t always mean you say “no” to everything and that doesn’t always mean that you say “no” every time. But it does mean that you realize that you are the one calling the shots. If an opportunity or idea is going to put extra strain on your home and family, you are the boss and you have the final say.
It’s easy to forget this and start feeling obligated to people and projects. Before committing to something, ask yourself a few hard questions like:
- “When am I going to find the time to do this?”
- “Is this going to take time and effort away from my most important priorities?”
- “Could I delegate this project to someone else?”
- “What is going to be the return on my investment of time?”
Never commit to something without careful consideration. I promise that you won’t regret it.
4. I’m Learning to Give Myself Grace
You might be able to juggle a lot of things and do a good job of it, but you aren’t nor will you ever be superwoman. You need margin and breathing room in your life. If you aren’t intentional about creating space in your schedule, it will become overrun with seeming must-do’s before you know it.
One of the best things I’ve done is to take Sundays completely off from anything blog related. Many weeks, I keep my phone and computer turned off from Saturday night until Monday morning. This weekly 24 hours of unplugging recharges and refreshes me.
In addition, I’m setting the bar lower when it comes to what I expect of myself. It’s wonderful to challenge myself, but it’s also important to realize that I’m never going to get everything done. There will always be another project that needs to be completed.
Instead of beating myself up over how far I have left to go, I’m learning to focus on being excited about the progress I’m making. Because moving forward — even at a microscopic rate — is still moving forward.
Adapted from my foreword to Blog-at-Home Mom; used with permission
K Ann Guinn says
This is wonderful! I’ve definitely been trying to figure out this “balance” thing for so long now. The point that really makes the most impact for me is Dave Ramsey’s idea that we need to have balance in our lives over the long haul; not at every given moment. It’s so easy for us to feel like a failure as a mom or as a blogger or as a wife, or a Christian, or a friend, etc., etc., etc., when really it’s a matter of trying to figure out what we need to be doing or focusing on RIGHT NOW. Thanks for sharing this truth!
Michelle says
Thank you so much for this! I just started blogging for a similar reason as you! It’s nice to see that it works for so many moms! Thank you!
Abigail @ They're Not Our Goats says
Wow, I felt like I could have written this introduction. I’m expecting my third child in August, planning on homeschooling my 5 year old in September, and trying to build my blog, teach voice part time outside of the home, and partially run a homestead too. I’ve been thinking that I just HAVE to restructure my life somehow for this coming year, and I know something has to give- but I don’t know just what yet. Thanks though for the thoughts and inspiration to figure it out and downsize my commitments a bit.
Brenda says
Very good thoughts. I think this is one of the most important reasons for “finding yourself”. If you don’t have a good grasp on your purpose, you’ll be floundering around trying to do everything you think you SHOULD do. Once you know what you cannot live without doing, you’re free to let so many other things go.
I also like what you said about once a certain responsibility starts to feel like a complete burden, you know it’s time to step back a little. I need to keep this in mind, because it’s something that happens in my life about every three months or so. 🙂
Missy Homemaker says
Fabulous post. I’ve felt overwhelmed with my blog, homeschooling and trying to keep my home in order. Some days I don’t write at all, and I miss it. Others it seems that’s all I do.
I so love writing for my blog. For years I kept a journal and have loved to write since I was in school. I was told though that I would never be able to make money doing that, so into science I went. Funny how years later here I am, pounding away at a keyboard now instead of pen to paper, but writing none the less.
Mary says
It is so encouraging to read about your mothering and blogging journey. When I heard you speak at The BEECH Retreat earlier this year I was blessed beyond measure by your words, and this post is like a little refresher course! 😉
I think the standards we set for ourselves can be SO high sometimes. It is ok to let things slide sometimes – having a supportive husband is very helpful, too.
Thanks again for the encouragement, Crystal.
Crystal says
Thanks so much for your kind encouragement, Mary!
ShelleyH says
As an older mom (I’m 51) with teens still at home, I can say it doesn’t end. You cannot do it all and once you embrace that, and as you so beautifully stated, give yourself grace you will thrive (and survive). I’ve been a parent for 22 years. When my eldest was in elementary, I tried to be the supermom who baked the cookies, joined PTA, went on every field trip and worked. I was exhausted and of little value to my family and to myself. Once I let some of that go, I was a better mom because I wasn’t a frazzled maniac trying to get “things” done. I focused on quality over quantity.
Jana @ Jana Says says
Your first point hit home for me the most. I, too, have shied away from the fact that I’m a writer for the exact same reasons. It’s as if admitting I’m a writer would make me less of a mom or something else in others’ opinions. But then, one day, I stopped caring and realized that I can no longer deny what I feel called to do and there’s no reason at all I can’t do both of those things.
My life has been exponentially enriched simply by acknowledging what I am. And that’s a writer AND a mom.
Your final bolded point also hit home for me. Because that’s the point I’m trying to get to. Thank you for being such a great, positive example that it is possible!
Lindsay Prifogle says
Thank you so much for this. I have no doubt that God put this post right in front of me today. I have been praying for Him to take control….I suffer from anxiety and I also suffer from not being able to say NO to people. I woke up this morning thinking about my priorities and realizing that I have it all wrong. I quit my job in July and feel like I am still very new to the Stay At Home Mom thing. I quit to stay home with my children and make them my #1 priority….but for some reason I have volunteered for way too many things and I feel like I am more busy than when I actually worked. This really helped me realized how out of balance I really am and I need to fight to get my kids back to the top of my to do list and slow down and enjoy them.
Thank you so much for this!! I enjoy your blog so much and thank you for putting yourself out there to inspire others. 🙂 God Bless You!
Tammy Doiel says
Thank you for this. I feel like I’m still getting my blog off the ground, so of course it is making no money. With my 5 kids, babysitting 3 kids 3-4 days a week, and being an assistant pastor’s wife, I’m still figuring out how to juggle it all. But I really am enjoying blogging more than I thought I would–and I want to keep it up. So I’ll keep trying to figure it out!
Wendelyn Daly says
Crystal,
I love how you have written about the struggles that I face, and given me hope. Reading your encouraging and truthful words are inspiring. Many women will read this and have a brighter tomorrow.
Thank you for your gift and love of writing!
Steph @ From the Burbs to the Boonies says
I’m new to blogging and I am finding it hard to find balance. I’ve always written professionally so it is a natural for me. I also work with my husband running our small business and am mom to a 7-year-old boy. We travel a lot for work too. So it’s hard, but I am doing my best and this is a wonderfully inspiring post. Thank you.
Heather says
Thank you for this!! I work part-time for a nonprofit overseeing 10 foundation websites, own a dessert business from my home and have two younger children. Balance and boundaries are something I struggle with all the time.
Two weeks ago my best friend’s parents lost their home and everything in it to the floods in the Big Thompson Canyon. If you knew you’d need to evacuate in 15 minutes, what would you take with you? Instant perspective on daily investment of time.
Ashley says
Amen to this! This completely lifted my spirits!!
Dezaree says
Once again, you have inspired me to NOT GIVE UP!
I recently gave up the thought that I could do everything (blog, be a mom, wife, student, and have a clean house) and I knew I had to change things.
So, I took charge of my actions and responsibilities!
~ I only do as much as I can and WANT to do on my blog. It will not control my time!
~ I take on one project at a time.
~ I keep notes of projects that I would like to do in the future.
~ I complete one project before starting a new one.
~ I take the weekends off.
~ I don’t do blog work while my husband is home (our time together is limited, so I get the most of it).
~ I ALWAYS put being a mom and wife first.
~ I try not to be so hard on myself.
~ And I read your blog for inspiration! You always seem to come to my rescue when I feel like giving up!
Thank you Crystal <3
Sonja says
Thanks so much…so needed…articulated well…just thinking “why are we doing McD’s drive-thru again”…beating myself up…but once a week eating a restaurant made sandwich won’t kill us! Looking at things over the course of a year VS. the last day or two is an AWESOME way to look at it!!! Thanks for sharing!!!!
Jaime says
As a young(er) sahm mom of 4 who also is trying to navigate this blogging world (and do it all), this seemed to be addressed to me.
I am in a constant conflict of doing too much or not doing enough. Everywhere.
I obsess and then I let other things go. I am trying desperately to find my own common ground, and I think that is something that you can not find on any blog (or real life advise), but rather have to find your happy place, yourself.
You provoke the thoughts and that is what great writers do! Thanks for this post!
Abbie (Five days...5 ways) says
Oh, Crystal, this is SO good!
Giving yourself grace and still working hard…those are the keys. Well, and starting with a reliance on the Lord, of course. I recently started a challenge on my blog called Project Elephant with the idea being to take at least one tiny bite of a bigger project each week. It’s so not about perfection. It’s about progress. And any progress is better than beating yourself up for not getting something accomplished…yet again.
Great post! It’s always good to know others in a similar state (I have 5 littles) struggle with the same things and are finding ways to overcome.
Amanda @ The Desert Homestead says
I’m so there right now.
4 kids, homeschooling the oldest, full time college for myself, running the house, potty training, and more than 30 animals depending on me… and worst of all, not much that can be pared away or delegated… thank you for this.
Erin K says
This was a great post! I almost didn’t read it since I am not a blogger, but really you can removed “blogger” and insert whatever else your calling and passion may be. 🙂 Thanks for the insights this morning.
Jessica says
Thank you for sharing. Your kids are adorable. I’m not a blogger, but I’m in a similar stage of life that you were in 2009. I have a busy husband who is still in school, a 12 mo. old daughter and I work 70 hours a week between my two jobs. I know something has to give, but I’ll be losing my job of 12 years in December, and am trying to press on until then.
Your blog is always a great encouragement to me. I especially enjoyed the note about being a mom through and through, as well as having another gift or passion.
Rachael @ Thriving on Thrifty says
Thanks so much for this post. I’ve found with my new blog that getting a blog off the ground is definitely a challenge and can be quite time demanding. I am a stay at home mom and really enjoy blogging, but it can sometimes be so difficult juggling blogging and taking care of my home, keeping my family on a budget and raising my son. This post has been so inspiring to keep me going. Your blog is what inspired me to start a blog and what continues to inspire me to keep it going even when it gets really tough. I really needed to read this today. THANK YOU!
Kimi @ The Nourishing Gourmet says
This was a beautiful post. I am still figuring out what it means for me personally to embrace my calling and find balance, but I have learned to give myself a lot of grace. What great idea to unplug completely for 24 hours. I love it!
Corene S. says
Thank you for your post. I am currently struggling on entering back into my working routine after my 2nd baby has been born. It has been extremely overwhelming, and exhausting. I have to remind myself that I need to enjoy my babies while they are little, and I am not superwoman. This is just what I needed today.
Raquel Evans says
Even as a full time homemaker without children (yet!) I appreciate the points in this article. I’ve struggled with chronic fatigue from Lyme, food allergies and hypothyroid and still feeling like as a full time homemaker for just two I should have time and energy to, well, to be superwoman.
I’m gradually discovering that time management techniques only help so much when my energy doesn’t last for a full afternoon of work anyway, and that my priorities really have to be pared down past the point I want them to be.
At my husband’s encouragement I’m repeating a simple one week menu plan for all of next month, and spending my couponing/shopping/cooking time that’s saved on finishing a book I tried to start writing at the beginning of the year.
Thanks for the encouragement that I’m not a horrible person for making a temporary priority shift!
Rebecca@Rebecca's Delightful Home says
You were reading my mind again! 😉 I am trying to find balance with blogging, being a mom and wife, and taking care of my health and home. Some days I get so stressed because I can’t get everything accomplished that I set out to do. I just have to take a deep breath and step back from what I am doing sometimes. It is nice to get advice from someone who is successful in those areas – someone who has been there and done that! Thank you!
Rebecca@Rebecca's Delightful Home says
Once again, you were reading my mind! I am trying to find the balance between blogging, being a mom and wife, and taking care of my health and home. I am loving what I am doing, but some days I get too stressed out and have to take a deep breath, and a step back. Thank y
Ashley says
Thank you for this post, Crystal. I have been at a crossroads of sorts lately–I’m a homeschooling mom of 4 kids, and although I don’t blog, I work from home part time (30 hours per week–so nearly full time). My husband and I have finally decided that we need to step back and look at our priorities so we can figure out how to truly thrive with all of this going on. This has been an encouragement for us to do just that so we can make our family what we want it to be.
Crystal says
Yes!
Katheryn F says
I love this! Thank you for being so honest and sharing. Being new to blogging and really trying to grow it is difficult to find balance and what works for my family. Giving ourselves grace is really what we need and not to compare. I will definitely be printing this out so I can keep it close at hand as a great reminder.
http://www.thehealthyandfithomeschoolmom.com
Crystal says
Grace is such a beautiful thing, isn’t it?!
Debbie L. says
Crystal–I so appreciate what you’re saying here, especially number one. While I don’t run a blog, I started my own business in 2004 and work out of my house. I’ve had 3 children since then. My husband has been extremely supportive since day one as well as our families and we’ve been able to make it work. It’s been a true blessing both financially and because I’ve been able to be here with my kids (2 are now in school and one goes every morning). But like anything it has not come without its challenges and some difficult days. There have been times over the years I’ve felt very alone among my friends who don’t work and sometimes felt like I’ve almost needed to apologize for what I do–as though by working, I’m somehow not being a “real” mom. But I know that is not the truth. God has given me specific gifts and abilities to serve him and others, I’ve met some wonderful, dear people, had a lot of fun, and he has blessed me immensely to be able to do this for going on 10 years.
Crystal says
{Hugs!} Just know that you are not alone!
So grateful to hear how God is blessing your gifts and talents for His glory!
Anonymous says
I think more times we say “NO” to God( the One who gave us our gifts) and fill ourselves with what makes us feel good. We must step back and reevaluate our relationship with Him and all else will fall into place.
Sarah B. says
Thanks for sharing. Far too often I have shouldered myself with guilt for not being able to give 100% to everything. But there is no such thing as a super mom. Thanks for sharing.
a terrible husband... says
Dad blogger here! Great stuff. I have a hard time letting go of things that mean less to me than family time and fiercely defend the family time.
Love this post. A great reminder to all of us.
Crystal says
Thanks for your kind encouragement!
Susan in St. Louis says
I love all the pics of your kids! 🙂
Thanks for sharing this. I feel as if it’s similar to what I’ve been learning the past few years…and for me, it meant that I stopped my public blog. Now that baby #4 is on the way, we’re really starting to homeschool, and we have a move looming in a few months, I’m blessed to have lots of help. Learning my limitations is HUGE in balancing mothering with anything, I believe!
Crystal says
Yes! It’s so important that we know our limitations!
Which is why I don’t stress over decorating my house or installing plugins on my blog. 😉
Meredith says
This post was helpful to me, too! I’m 32 weeks pregnant with our third child, working full-time, my husband has been working crazy overtime (which is a huge blessing financially), and trying to help my older children stay on task with their school work. I feel like the Little Engine That Could. I’m used to being so much more productive, but this pregnancy has been rough since the start. I feel guilty that my other children are getting impatient parents, who are just tired, but it’s not the kids fault. Anyway, I keep reminding myself that this will pass, but in the meantime, I’m just trying to take it day by day…. and finally breaking down and hiring a cleaning lady once or twice a month to help out!
Kelly @ New Leaf Wellness says
What inspires me most about your blog is that you continue to share insight like this, instead of solely focusing on coupons and money-saving tips. I love your posts like this one!
Stacey says
While I don’t have a blog, I can definitely relate to this post in many ways. I am a Scentsy consultant, AND I make bows (for the last 3 years) but I also have a husband who has PTSD, and 2/3 of my children have special needs.
I tend to want to do everything, then add new things onto my plate on top of what I already have going on. I just can’t do it. My husband has been trying to tell me this for years, that I am just overbooking myself.
I am highly considering finding someone to come clean some of my home 1-2 times a week. I’m not sure if it’s in the budget considering we JUST started to budget since your weekly budget meeting post, but we shall see. I could really use the help!
I really enjoy your blog, and I am so glad I found you!
Organize365 says
Crystal-
You are so amazing. I LOVE how you can articulate just what I am thinking.
It is SO true. We can be called to be mothers AND another calling. It think that is the crux of the stay at home vs. work at home mommy debate.
Ultimately when we embrace who WE are in Christ, which is 100% unique, the comparison stops.
I SO love your posts – i am always looking forward to the next one!
🙂
Lisa
Lesley says
Love this. As a new mom and a small business owner this really helped motivate me to learn to say no. Thank you so much!
Victoria says
Great post and super cute pictures of the kids. I got to say some of my favorite photos on the blogs are of your kids you have a great eye for catching their expressions at just the right time. I love the part about looking at balance over the year and not the day or week.
Kathleen says
Crystal, I’m pinning this so I can read it over and over (and over). We appreciate your transparency!
Robin B. says
Wow, is this a timely post for me both personally and professionally! I have been going through a similar sorting out of priorities and how to best use my God-given gifts and talents as a mom and professional organizer without becoming completely overrun and worn down. This post gave me some great perspective and clarity. Thank you so much!
Carrie says
“blogging can bless your family and energize you as a mom”
I’m so glad you said this! I’m very much inspired by stories of writing moms from the past. For example, Harriet Beecher Stowe wrote early in the mornings before her (seven – I can relate!) kids got up. She funneled money from her writing-for-pay projects into some household help so she could write more. What if she hadn’t done this and decided that it was wrong of her write while her kids were young? We wouldn’t have Uncle Tom’s Cabin.
Audrey Borkholder says
These are words of wisdom for juggling any areas in life, not just writing and motherhood. I’m at a very different spot in life than you are, but this blog was encouraging! It’s all about BALANCE. Thank you for hitting the button to put this post out there and best wishes as you (and the rest of us!) continue your journey! 🙂
Brittany says
I’m not anywhere near where I would like to be with my blog which scares me because it already takes up a lot of time. Thank you for this. I was so excited to be a SAHM and now I’m finding that it’s more difficult being a blogger because of the fact that I’m doing it with my children around. It’s harder than working away from home. I appreciate your honesty about finding a healthy balance. 🙂
Joy Anderson says
Crystal,
Beautifully said!!! We are all grateful that you’ve embraced your calling as a writer, because your blog helps us out in our own lives! (Especially… motherhood!)
So glad you found balance,
Joy
Leah H says
Have you secretly stopped by my house the past few months!? 🙂 I’m into real food, chickens, gardening, homeschooling 2 and working from home as a graphic designer on top of homeschool co-op, AHG and the like. I enjoy it all but I’ve found many of the things you talked about hold true for me!
I’m not superwoman and my house won’t be pristine for many years to come, but I have to embrace what I feel God has truly called me to, not just what I “can do”. I heard a lady that was talking about embracing your gifts, not stretching yourself so thin for things you aren’t gifted in. I’ve learned to let others step up (including my hubby) and that it’s okay to say “No. I can’t commit to that right now.” I completely agree with a “Healthy Balance”. The days where I don’t see that balance are enough to get me back to it! The whole family suffers!
Thanks so much for reminding me that it’s about the progress, not how far I have to go. I have so many goals for so many things, but moving forward, even slowly is GOOD ENOUGH! 😉
Liz Ann says
This is one of the most encouraging posts you’ve written! We all need to know that our heroes struggle and have to muddle through until they find a healthy balance. Thank you for being honest. 🙂
Keren Threlfall says
Like the first comment, “Or really, how to balance motherhood and any other pursuit. Excellent thoughts! I’ve had to learn similar lessons the hard way as well.”
Thanks for sharing, Crystal. I’ve found myself coming to many of these conclusions myself, though a bit more gradually. I have three young children (all under 5) and no family or nearby to help out with house or child care. My kids aren’t in preschool or any outside-of-the home care, so if they’re not with me, they’re with my husband. In the mean time, I’ve been pursuing some of my passions that can be pursued at this season of life. I work from home part-time, and the work-life balance can get interesting and sometimes stressful!
I’m realizing now that my conscience of what I “was allowed to pursue” was bound by opinions, not moral doctrine, which would fall under your #1, of “I’m Learning to Embrace My Callings.” But I’m also learning that I need to figure out which calling to pursue during which season(s) of life. (“The Renaissance Soul: Life Design for People with Too Many Passions to Pick Just One” was helpful to that end.)
I’ve learned to dump a lot of things, but delegating is super hard for me right now, especially when it means probably having someone else to come in/pay to help with some of my other life upkeep. We’ll see. 🙂 I definitely see the need…
Rebekah says
I really appreciate this post. It came at a good time for me. I really struggle to find the balance between my jobs (I primarily work from home) and family. I have been having similar thoughts about trying to balance everything. Your post was confirmation that I am heading the right direction. Thank you.
Kelly Wiggains says
Thanks for your words of encouragement, Crystal. Your posts seem to resonate with me when I need encouragement more than anything.
On a different note, I love these pictures of your kids. Great shots!
Jim says
Thanks for this Crystal! “When there is a balance, things don’t feel like a burden.” So so so encouraging and good for fathers too!
jennifer says
Nice post! It’s so freeing to finally realize and accept who and what you are.
Katie says
I love this! Your perspective on balance is so true! I definitely admire that you take 24 hours to recharge. That’s hard to do, but it is so important. Thanks for this post, and I am officially adopting you as my online mentor :).
Katie says
I completely put that reply in the wrong place and can’t figure out how to edit it :). Thanks for all you do, Crystal!
Crystal says
🙂 Thank you so much for your kind encouragement!
Mel says
Encouraging words, Crystal. I’m not a Mom, but finding that balance to build the life I want is an ongoing process. The “saying no” part is what I struggle with the most, but just last week I turned down a little side job that seemed like it would only require a few hours a week, but on closer examination, I could see it disrupting so many parts of my life.
My major epiphany so far this year is that working as far ahead as possible helps enormously. I’ve been applying that to my websites with measurable success; next up, freezer cooking and buckling down to work on Christmas presents.
deborah says
This kind of post is always encouraging! We all have struggles and juggles.
I always envision this perfect scenario and everything falling in place. But that’s simply not real life. I struggle sometimes with choosing the best thing I need to be doing or direction I need to be going.
Love the pics of your kiddos! Children always are so enthusiastic and add such fun to life.
Crystal says
I’ve started to plan for interruptions and worst case scenarios… then, if it doesn’t happen or there are only half as many disruptions, I feel like I’ve been given a gift. 🙂
Thanks for your kind encouragement!
Kristen says
Thank you so much for sharing this. I’m finding myself in a somewhat similar situation to what yours looked like in ’09. I found your words inspiring, freeing, and encouraging. Thank you for sharing from your heart to speak to mine. God used this article to give me perspective. 🙂
Crystal says
{hugs!} I am so grateful that this post was a blessing to you!
Lisa says
Thank you for always being do real with your struggles Crystal. I love your honesty, for it has inspired me in so many ways: to continued time with God, help me grow in my relationships with my kids, and continue to show my husband how much I appreciate him. You are truly a superwoman in every sense 🙂
Crystal says
Not superwoman, but I am grateful that God can use broken vessels for His glory! And thank you for your kind encouragement!
BrownThumbMama says
Amen! So very, very true.
Sometimes I think I’ll lose my “frugal blogger cred” if I buy something instead of making it. But there are days when all the other things in the world take precedence.
Fast food for dinner on the way to visit Grandpa in the care home? You bet.
Hiring someone to prune the neighbor’s overgrown trees? Much safer than doing it myself.
Thank you for writing this and sharing it with all of us!
Tiffany says
Adapted from my foreword to Blog-at-Home Mom; “used with permission” LOL! And a sense of humor to go with it!
Crystal says
I don’t own the book, so I wanted to clarify that I’d asked permission to share this foreword on my blog. 🙂
lexi says
This post blessed me incredibly tonight. I am not so much into writing but often feel the burden of so many things pulling for my attention as wife and mom. I can get so discouraged as I always find myself feeling that as soon as I finish one task there WILL be another task waiting. I often feel bad for wanting to head to the garage to work on painting or re-finishing furniture and even though I enjoy it I also use it as a second income. Anyhow, I NEEDED to read this tonight. I have been blessed by your Godly advice many times Crystal!
Crystal says
I’m so, so thankful that this post encouraged you!
Krissy @ Just Take Two Bites says
Finding the time to blog the way I want to while still being a mother has been the biggest struggle for me recently. I have the opposite problem in that my blog has not yet grown to what I’d like it to be, thus requiring more of my attention. It goes both ways, I suppose. It is really important to find balance–I’m afraid I’m still a work in progress.
Crystal says
I think we *all* are works in progress, so be encouraged! 🙂
Rachael @ Thriving on Thrifty says
Krissy, I just wanted to let you know that I checked out your blog, and I really like your posts!
MK Jorgenson says
Yes. Just yes.
Charlotte says
I couldn’t agree more and I am daily struggling to find the right balance for our family. I appreciate you sharing and also sharing what has worked for you!
Christy says
Just wanted to say that I have followed your blog for many years! I HAD to learn to save money because I had 3 children in diapers and we were slowly sinking as a 1 income family! You offered so much Godly encouragement along with deal scenarios and REALLY helped me get excited about couponing and getting deals! Thank you for all your hard work and help! BUT i am very thankful for this post, because it shows you aren’t superwoman, you are REAL! It has helped me realize we all get stressed and overwhelmed at times thinking well maybe I need to do more, but yet it is less that we need!! Thanks again, and I have sent MANY people to your blog, not only for deals, but for a lil spiritual feeding too! Thank you!! 🙂
Crystal says
Thank you so much for sticking around here for so long — and for passing the word along, as well. Your comment blessed me a great deal tonight!
Denise says
I love it when you write posts like this one! So open and honest with us! Thank you for that!
Crystal says
Thank you so much for your encouragement and for reading here!
Melanie says
Thanks so much for this. I keep feeling that God is calling me to write. I keep hearing it at every turn. I keep saying no, not right now. How will I ever have a clean house if I try to blog? How will I ever have time to feed my family real food if I sit down and take time to write and edit?
I think the biggest encouragement for me in this post is how you said “In fact, I’ve worked harder and been stretched further in the last few years than I ever envisioned I was capable of. At the same time, though, I’m invigorated and energized by the responsibilities on my plate, instead of being drained and exhausted by them.” I am so scared I’m going to be exhausted, get my feelings hurt, and want to give up, but that paragraph just sticks out to me. Thank you.
Crystal says
You are so welcome! I’m grateful this post was a blessing!
Mackenzie says
Love, love, love this post Crystal! I can’t tell you how timely this is for me right now. Sometimes as a mom, you definitely get pulled in different directions.
Crystal says
Thank you so much for your kind encouragement!
Sarah D. says
Or really, how to balance motherhood and any other pursuit. Excellent thoughts! I’ve had to learn similar lessons the hard way as well.
Crystal says
You are so right that these principles could be applied to other situations, as well!