Cherishing the moments

Yesterday, we were driving to an appointment when one of my children piped up from the back seat, “Is it okay if I start calling you Mom instead of Mommy?”

The question caught me a little off guard.

It reminded me, yet again, how much my babes are growing up. I told the child that yes, they were more than welcome to start calling me “Mom” if that was what they felt most comfortable with.

Much as I wish I could, I can’t keep them little. As I read in a book recently, “Parenting is one of the few jobs where you work to make yourself obsolete.”

I’m excited to see each of my children growing, maturing, and learning so much. Their excitement about life blesses and inspires me.

And even on the difficult and exhausting days of motherhood, I’m so thankful to be their mommy… er, mom. :)

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    • says

      I *think* it’s from John Ortberg’s book “When the Game is Over It All Goes Back in the Box” — but don’t quote me on that since I sometimes get my books mixed up. :)

      • Brenda says

        It’s brand new. I just took it off maintenance mode yesterday. I haven’t gone too public with it yet. Still need to fix some links and other stuff. But I’m excited about it bc it’s me. Not me trying to blog about busy bags. :) it’s just my place to write the kind of writing that comes naturally.

  1. says

    Aww… My daughter use to call me mama all the time.. and then one day I just noticed it had disappeared. It use to be so cute as she would draw it out especially when she was upset maaaaaamaaaaaa then come run into my lap to cuddle. It does go so fast. Now I can’t see the top of my oldest son’s head unless he bends down for me. My middle child is now looking me straight in the eye and my baby girl!! she is getting her curves and starting to look more and more like me every day.

  2. Susan says

    Sadly, too, the younger children pick up on this sooner. I don’t think my 8th child hardly called me mommy at all .

  3. says

    My kids (ages 15, 12, 10 & 8) all still call me mommy! I keep thinking it will change. Now that it has been so long I will definitely be sad when they quit.

    Mom is better than Mother though. My dad decided one day when he was 12 that he would start calling his mom Mother and it stuck – everyone called her that – even her husband!

  4. Grace says

    My 7 yr old is really intuitive and asks crazy questions. Yesterday he asked me “mom, if you had surgery so you can’t have any more babies why is there a baby in your belly?” I had my tubes tied 2 years ago and yet I’m pregnant. Haha! As much as we want to keep them little they seem to grow up faster and faster :(

  5. Chris says

    My 8th grade son always says, “See ya later, mommy…” as he gets out of the car at school. All other times, I am “mom”. I love that.

  6. says

    Sweet! I love how your child asked for permission. My son just went from mama to mom without consulting me. I was sad. But sometimes he forgets, even at 10, and calls me mama, which I cherish.

    • says

      Wait, how come I didn’t know about your new blog?!? I just went over there and read every post… love you so much and am so happy to discover your new blog!

      Also? I love this: “Embrace the freedom. Embrace the beauty of YOU.”

  7. Robin says

    The picture of your daughter in the pink… she looks SOOO much like you there, Crystal.

  8. andi says

    Oh this just brought tears to my eyes. I remember the day my oldest told me he was only gonna call me momma at home, and “mom” at school. :’( they grow up too fast on us..

  9. says

    While we are in the midst of being the Mama, it is sometimes hard to see the joy and wonderfulness of it. My 3rd child just graduated from high school and started college this summer, so with just one more at home (he is 16) it is a bit quiet. But it is incredible to see how they have grown and that they are doing so well. If I can brag for a moment: #1 graduated college 5/12, 6 month internship at Epcot, now grad school (with assistanceship) in WA; #2 will begin jr year in college in Aug, this summer mission trip to Paraguay- all paid for with scholarships, even mission trip; #3 graduated high school in May, started college 2 weeks before high school graduation- has 3+ years of college already paid for with scholarships. #4 started 1st job as life guard at city pool, and will do all the farm chores this summer, with a little help from mom.

    I am so proud of each of them, and hope that maybe I had a little to do with their success. Can’t wait to see what the next new adventure is. So thankful for frequent flier miles that I can go and visit them..

    Embrace the day, Crystal, and give them each a big hug.

    • Aimee says

      So you’re saying that I won’t be in a fetal position crying all the time when my kids move out? :-). I’m (somewhat) joking here. :-D

      • says

        There are days when the house is way to quiet with most or all the kids gone, but I am enjoying the time too, now that I am getting used to it. But they all call to chat or when they need help or advice. And I am so glad to be able to help, even if it means dropping what I am doing to help them. I will be their Mama forever.

  10. Debbie says

    Your answer to her was perfect. I am so glad you shared that story. It will be easier for you if they don’t wait until they are in their teens. Trust me.

  11. Marie says

    today my two graduated kindergarten! They were so cute! It’s sad how fast they grow up.
    You took great pictures of your kids!

  12. Staci says

    Do not panic too much by this question. I was stunned by the question when my daughter was 7. I answered in much the same way while blinking back tears. But…that same daughter is now 16 and she still calls me Mommy! I asked her recently why since I had told her she could call me whatever and she told me that it just did not seem natural and she just keeps forgetting anyway! :-) Go Mommies everywhere!!!

  13. Ashley says

    My kids have never called me mommy, which hasn’t bothered me a bit. But I certainly understand the point of this post. My kids are growing up so quickly!

    • Brandy says

      Same here! I wanted my kids to call me mama because that’s what I call my mom. Anything else feels strange to my mouth. Ha! Hopefully, they won’t stop calling me mama.

  14. lori says

    This post is so sweet and poignant. They do grow so fast. My son called me a variety of names as he was growing. Mama, Mommy, Muvvers (have no idea were that came from!), by my first name (he is an onl ), and Mom. Now that he is 25 I get “Ma” or “Mother” when he is exasperated with me. ( I think it is the equivalent of calling your child by their first and middle names) I cherished each and every name. I never minded what he called me, just was glad he kept calling me!

  15. Marie says

    For all the Mommy’s, Mama’s, Moms, Mothers and any other term to describe a mom I want to share a set of books that I found when I was pregnant with my boy/girl twins 6 years ago. They are by Ronne Randall and they are called
    Mommy’s Little Boy
    Mommy’s Little Girl
    Daddy’s Little Girl
    They are beautifully illustrated and so sweet. Just tonight my children asked me to read them to them! It couldn’t have been a more perfect way to cap off our celebrating their graduation from kindergarten today!

  16. says

    Oh no! I don’t think I’d be ready for that, but it is a good sign that they are growing and maturing at the appropriate rate. You must be doing a good job. :)

  17. says

    Aww that is so sweet they asked! My just turned 6 year old started calling me mom instead tugs at my heart a little bit, they grow up so fast.

  18. says

    Even though I agree that parenting is a job where you work to make yourself obsolete–you are always needed as a parent. To pray for, to encourage, to give wisdom/advice when asked. I talk to my parents so much and rely on their common sense and wisdom in God’s Word. Again, I totally agree with the point of raising your children to be independent, and to be able to let go–however, they’ll always need us (just in different ways). :)
    My oldest daughter (10 1/2) asks if it’s babyish to call me “mommy” still, as our neighbor told her that. :( I said the same as you said–if she wants to call me mommy, she can as long as she wants to.

    • says

      I completely agree and here’s what I wrote on Facebook to someone else who brought this up:

      I believe it was meaning more that you are working yourself out of a job since the goal of parenting is to raise self-sufficient adults. But you are absolutely right that I think our parents become even more invaluable the older we get — or at least I sure respect and appreciate them a lot more than I think I ever did growing up! :)

  19. Lana says

    All of our kids are adults now and 4 out of 5 of them still call me Mommy. Our oldest started calling me Mom because his wife said he should. My grandmother, all 4 feet 10 inches of her, was called Little Mommy until she died at 93. Being called Mom makes me feel old for some reason but Nana that the grandchildren call me does not :)

  20. Susan says

    Don’t worry Crystal, they may revert back to calling you Mommy. My DD called me Mama, then Mom, and now at 12 often calls me Mommy.

    Enjoy every stage. I have just one child. I miss my baby, my toddler, my preschooler, etc, but I love my 12-year-old, and next month I’ll love my teenager.

  21. Lisa says

    My daughter turned 1 a week ago. She still likes to have a bottle of milk before nap and bedtime. I was snuggling with her on her birthday, giving her a bottle before her morning nap. I started worrying that she would never outgrow this and thinking I should start weaning her away from it. And then I realized, she won’t do this forever and that when she stops, I will miss it. And then I cried ;-)

    Also, I’m looking forward to when she starts calling me Mommy. She can say Mama, though (it was her first word), and I love that when I come home from work and she sees me, she grins and says, “Mama, mama, mama!”