Comments on: Poll: Who does the finances in your home?

By: Jessica

Jessica — Tue, 28 Oct 2008 09:48:06 +0000

I handle the finances because my husband wanted it that way. It’s just more my forte. He has a hard time remembering to pay things, keeping up with what money we have available, etc. I can be a blessing to him in this way, because it’s one less thing he has to worry about after a hard day at work. However, it IS hard to remember that it’s HIS money too. Lately I’ve been paying everything that’s necessary in our budget then talking to him about what he’d like to do with the extra instead of just divvying it out where I think it’s appropriate. This has helped us have more of a “team” mindset instead of making me the money police. ) I can let him know what my ideas are for what we should do with it, then we discuss what he’d like to do and usually come to some compromise.
I would like to really encourage you to take this on and learn how to do it. I know someone who was recently widowed, and she had NEVER had to handle a budget before, so it has been difficult for her to know what to do. Even though I’m pretty sure she has been well provided for, she’s frequently fearful about running out of money because she just doesn’t know how far her money will go and what to do with it. Your husband is DEFINITELY looking out for your best interests by encouraging you to try this while he’s here to help you figure it all out.

By: Becky @ 4 Days in a Week

Becky @ 4 Days in a Week — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 08:11:17 +0000

After 16 years of marriage and my doing it all, my husband just took it over this summer. He felt very convicted that it is part of his duty and responsibility as the leader of our home. I am so relieved! I was not good at staying within a budget and we overspent dipping in to savings all the time. He has us on a strict budget now which is hard for this shopaholic but, we’ll have our savings built back up soon and have funds for other things that come up!
I am relieved that he ‘stepped up’ to this role! He doesn’t want me stressing over it and I did!

By: Rachel R.

Rachel R. — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 01:11:07 +0000

I knew I was in the minority. The only I’m surprised by is that I am not in MORE of a minority. It seems like every single other woman I know IRL, except my mom, does the finances for her household.

By: ANN KELLY PARKHURST

ANN KELLY PARKHURST — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 08:06:12 +0000

I PAY ALL THE BILLS AND DO ALL SHOPPING FOR ALL HOUSEHOLD ITEMS BUT MY HUBBY DOES ALL THE LONG TERM STUFF, RETIREMENT, COLLEGE SAVINGS, LIFE INS. ETC.

By: Linda

Linda — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 22:15:03 +0000

I understand where your husband is coming from, in wanting you to know what to do incase something happens.

May I suggest that you do it together!!!

My husband in is the miltary so it has fallen my lot to pay bills when he is gone. And I hate it!!! I don’t like the stress of worrying about everything getting paid on time and making sure we stay on budget. I also become very demanding because I start thinking $$ should be spent my way.

Do it together so you can learn, but DON’T take sole responsiblity (sp)

By: Sarah

Sarah — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 18:34:17 +0000

my husband has admitted that he’s a giant spender, and has hadned control of all money over to me, since i have trouble spending anything. i pay all the bills, and keep track of how much is in our various bank accounts. he has only the vaguest idea of how much money we have where, and doesnt WANT to know, because he’s convinced he’d spend it if he knew how much we have in savings. he’d also be likely to pay all the bills in one go and then wonder why we have no money for the next few weeks, instead of spreading them out and paying when we need to. so he’s asked me to do it all.

By: Spreadsheet Queen

Spreadsheet Queen — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 17:44:01 +0000

I’m a nerd. I’m good at it. I like it.

By: Heather

Heather — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 15:11:56 +0000

I love handling the day-to-day bills and making spreadsheets and lists. So I do it. My husband spends about 5 minutes reviewing the monthly budget and always says it looks fine. We each get x amount (depending on how broke we are) of money as an allowance in cash each month. Still, sometimes I feel terrible that I have to tell my husband he can’t buy such and such unplanned thing because we have no money for it. He’s the free spirit and very optimistic about money. We’re the complete opposite of the typical stereotype about women spending lots of money shopping and men trying to reign them in. Funny, that’s also how my parents were growing up – my dad would buy things and my mom would make him return them.

By: One Mom, Five Kids

One Mom, Five Kids — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 11:02:30 +0000

My husband and I have our own money, separate accounts. My husband takes care of the household bills, utilities, morgage, car, insurance etc…(all the big bills) I pay for the groceries, clothes and household stuff.

By: carrie @ Heart of a Servant

carrie @ Heart of a Servant — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 10:44:47 +0000

I am primarily the one who takes care of getting bills paid and our bi-weekly budgeting system. I do this because I enjoy it and I’m more gifted in that area than my husband and he says that he’s glad I am so willing to do it! But every financial decision we make is discussed and my husband has the final “say so.” I prefer it this way because I know that these decisions aren’t made alone!!

By: Carol

Carol — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 10:22:32 +0000

I do the bills; but, I would much prefer my husband do them. Unfortunately, as a truck driver, he is gone way too much to be able to do them.

Hopefully, he will take over when he gets off the road is a couple of years.

By: Shani

Shani — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 09:32:41 +0000

My husband and I both have our own accounts, checking and savings. We each have bills we are responsible for and if something extra comes up we discuss how to split the cost or who will pay it. I am considered the breadwinner (I make quite a bit more) so I pay the larger household bills. Its not 50/50 in anyway and its been working for us for 6 years now.

By: Shani

Shani — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 09:30:44 +0000

By: Jenna

Jenna — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 09:20:52 +0000

I actually do all the finances. My husband knows what is going on with our finances but he doesn’t post them into microsoft money or balance the check book, but he is really good at spending the money, lol.

Jenna

http://newlyweds.wordpress.com/

By: Erika

Erika — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 09:07:27 +0000

I handle the money and have since we got married almost 11 years ago. Brian works so much that it is easier if I do it. He is a big picture kind of a guy and I’m detail oriented, so it works well. Usually on Sunday I will give him “the state of the union” address. Since he is paid hourly, he usually knows how many hrs. he will be working so that helps me to know how much is coming in. Then we decide where the money will go for the week. It’s a good system for us.

By: Jennifer B

Jennifer B — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 08:47:08 +0000

DH is in charge of ours. Though I did my own for years before we met, I have never felt comfortable with the long term planning. (I know how to save but he knows how to make the saved money grow.) As for our bills, he receives them and pays them all online.

By: julie-momof4sweetsisters

julie-momof4sweetsisters — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 08:46:24 +0000

When we were first married we did them together. I had banking experience before marriage – my husband had none. When children came along and he was working extra hours he asked me to do it all. I became very “protective” of my budget and felt I was becoming more powerful! I didn’t like that at all and begged him to take over. We tried but work seemed to take over.I would discuss it regualarly with him becuase I hated that feeling! I felt like I was usurping his authority and he is the better saver (he really is). Well to make it short we decided to do our monthly budget together.I make it up, he looks it over and gives approval and make changes were he feels they are needed. I still write out the bills. I like this soooo much(not writing out the bills)! I don’t feel like I’m alone in carrying the burden and he sees where the moola is going and how crazy some of the rates are getting.

By: Lisa

Lisa — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 08:36:41 +0000

I think it is a great idea for both the husband and wife to learn and do the finances. After my father-in-law passed away, my mother-in-law was clueless in how to handle her finances because she never did them. She is still getting help from my sister-in-law.

Try it for a while so you know the ropes at least. If you don’t like it, let your husband take over again.

Lisa

By: Debbie

Debbie — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 08:23:04 +0000

I’ve always handled the bills in our family, even when we were both working and had no children. I don’t know why, it just happened that way. Now that I am at home full time and responsible for the running of the household, it makes sense that I should be responsible for managing the money too.

By: Mary in Ohio

Mary in Ohio — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 08:17:56 +0000

I do the bills n our family only because dh doesn’t want to do them and would rather I do them and just let him know what is going on with everything. For large purchases we decide together on them but I do the bills, the shopping (both household, grocery, kids, etc) he hates to shop for anything and I hate it less so I do it! We need to work harder on putting money away but we are getting there! We made our decisions on who would school the kids, do the bills, etc before we got married and have stuck to it for the last 19 years!!!